u/SuperDog3888

I (early 20s, female) moved to a city for work about a year and a half ago that just so happens to be a party city after graduating from college. The main activities of this city seem to be drinking, partying, and smoking, which are all activities I have tried and am not into. The other people who don't do those sort of activities seem to be married with kids and looking for parent friends.

With that being said, I've tried making friends but I'm still socially isolated from everyone. I've joined group activites/clubs, gone out on my own, and have also approached people on my own but nothing has really stuck since there is no common interest between me and the people in this area. The friendships I do have are with people across the country (and globe!) so I know I'm capable of making friends. This is the only area I've ever struggled.

I've tried inviting people out to do things that I'm comfortable with, like dinners or activities, but I haven't had much luck. It's making me depressed because I feel like my friends across the country have other friends and I'm becoming socially isolated.

Being alone doesn't stop me from doing anything, but it IS incredibly lonely. I'm an extrovert and really need social connection, and doing things alone just isn't fulfilling for me. I often have fun at the event but wish I had someone to share the experience with or talk about it with, and I feel myself becoming increasingly more depressed. With all that being said... how do I keep the depression at bay and regain happiness in my life? I've already tried exercising and mindfulness, they haven't helped.

Repost since the adoption sub told me to post here instead.

I was adopted (international country to the US) by white people. I am a POC. I grew up in a predominantly white area but my parents tried to force me into learning about "my" culture and socializing with other adoptees from my region of the world. When I wasn't acting in the way my adoptive parents wanted me to like doing the hobbies they wanted me to do, I felt like I was never good enough. They wanted me to be their perfect little POC adoptee kid.

Now that I'm an adult living on my own I'm beginning to realize that my adoptive parents only loved the idea of me, and not actually who I was. I hate my birth parents and have no desire to meet them, and it's making me come to terms with the fact that people have only loved the idea of me, not me for who I really am.

I'm starting to resent my adopted parents just like I resent my birth parents. I feel like my adopted parents wanted the perfect little child, and if it was not me, another body double would be fine as long as the child behaved in the way that they wanted it to. As cliche as it sounds I feel like other people don't understand, or they don't want to take the time and listen to me. And I've tried 5+ therapists and after seeing unethical behavior, like pushing religion on me, so I quit therapy. It wasted my time and money.

Is this anyone else's experience? Or is it just me?

I was adopted (international country to the US) by white people. I am a POC. I grew up in a predominantly white area but my parents tried to force me into learning about "my" culture and socializing with other adoptees from my region of the world. When I wasn't acting in the way my adoptive parents wanted me to like doing the hobbies they wanted me to do, I felt like I was never good enough. They wanted me to be their perfect little POC adoptee kid.

Now that I'm an adult living on my own I'm beginning to realize that my adoptive parents only loved the idea of me, and not actually who I was. I hate my birth parents and have no desire to meet them, and it's making me come to terms with the fact that people have only loved the idea of me, not me for who I really am.

I'm starting to resent my adopted parents just like I resent my birth parents. I feel like my adopted parents wanted the perfect little child, and if it was not me, another body double would be fine as long as the child behaved in the way that they wanted it to. As cliche as it sounds I feel like other people don't understand, or they don't want to take the time and listen to me. And I've tried 5+ therapists and after seeing unethical behavior, like pushing religion on me, so I quit therapy. It wasted my time and money.

Is this anyone else's experience? Or is it just me?

I am adopted from a country in Asia and have lived in multiple states, some with high Asian populations and some with nonexistent ones. Literally everywhere I go I get asked by both Asians and non-Asians alike where I'm from. Male and female. All ages. Since I was adopted as a baby, I answer with the U.S. state that I grew up with and most people will ask something along the lines of "where are you REALLY from" or "what kind of Asian are you"?

It's gotten to a point where I can expect it for ~50% of conversations. It usually gets asked early on, like before I know someone's last name or occupation. I do not really consider myself Asian beyond the fact that I was literally born in an Asian country. I do not speak any of the languages or practice any of the cultural traditions. When people learn that, Asian askers tend to be offended, and non-Asian askers tend to be surprised and ask why.

I've never tried searching for my birth parents because frankly, I don't care about those people at all. I'm getting really sick of people only seeing me for my skin color but they keep asking about my ethnicity and heritage. If you get asked these sorts of racist questions what's your answer? How do you handle it?

My body is broken. My vision is not correctable to 20/20, my ankles do not bend properly, and I have some food intolerances - all of these are strictly medical and not even appearance based. My body has prevented me from my dream job because said medical issues. I can't eat foods that I enjoy eating because of how my body reacts to them. I often need special meals at catered events and it's so embarrassing. Plus people aren't accommodating...

I genuinely hate this broken body so much, but it's also ugly. I still move and am active but the proportions and fat distribution aren't changing. I'm a POC and all people see is my skin color and they like to ask me questions about it which I hate.

I'm thinking about spending the rest of my life in this broken, useless, and ugly body and it's honestly so depressing. I'm in my early 20s. Why was I cursed with such a terrible vessel of existence?