u/Terrible-Dot-3929

After a huge fight when I found out my mother went into my apartment and threw all of my ADHD medication away (i live in UK where it’s not easily prescribed), I asked for my passports and money she had put in the safe. She wouldn’t return them, so I tried to guess thé code and, when I couldn’t, tried to see if the keys I found worked. They didn’t. So, I called the police and she returned them acting innocent like I was being unreasonable. I block her and go to a hotel. Fast forward to my appointment with my therapist where she informed me my mother had called her saying she couldn’t contact me, I was a danger to myself and others (which is why my therapist had to listen to her), that I was trying to get the gun out of the safe, and that she had called a welfare check on me (she did not). She’s now cut me off financially after promising she would help me pay for my apartment if I came home for a while (and thus had to resign from my job — I kind of hated it anyway, but now hâve no income). Anyway, just needed to vent.

i need advice. i am 37, for context. sorry so long.

i recently went to contact with my mother after a huge fight about her throwing out my medication and calling both my psychiatrist and therapist behind my back. During the fight she started telling me my grandparents and everyone found me miserable and hated me. they all know i’m currently going through trauma therapy which has made me emotional and angry about a lot of things. police were involved because i wanted to get back my funds and passport which she kept in a safe and i’m very embarrassed.

i have since left and gone to my stepfathers which is cross country. previous to this, i had a miscarriage and very difficult situation where i lived abroad. i’ve been living in this country and supporting myself for the past three years. my mother flew over and took me to the hospital and said i needed to come home for a while for my own well-being. i relunctantly agreed because i was feeling vulnerable, alone, and confused.

at this time my father and mother who hadn’t talked in 30 years reconnected, which seemed nice at the time but now that i’m going through trauma therapy, i’m bringing up a lot of things they did throughout my childhood and they’re both siding against me that i just ‘need to get over it’ and ‘let the past go’. my grandparents also told me i was ungrateful since my mom has always taken care of me when i reached out to apologise if she found me miserable it was just i’ve been finding some aspects of my mother difficult.

i have two months of rent saved but after that i am out of money. my mother had said previously she would cover my rent but now i don’t feel like i can ask her to do that. i just don’t want to lose my apartment with all my belongings in it.

i plan to get a job where my stepfather lives but then i feel like i would be stuck here and i want to go back to where i live abroad even if i am alone there as it’s the only place i feel like is ’mine’.

my stepfather doesn’t seem to understand why i want to go back even though i’ve tried to explain to him. i feel like all my family (except him and maybe my dad’s mom who i haven’t reached out to yet) hates me and i have no support. i did say some harsh things to both my mom and my dad at the time i guess, but i felt like my autonomy had been stripped from me because of their actions. i also have since lost my job in there because of being gone so long. I am trying to apply for jobs there as well as jobs here.