u/Thin-Peak1462

So this is a bit random or maybe it’s not very important but to be honest I want to get people’s opinion because what the heck was that?

So I added this guy on Snapchat he was on live on TikTok and to be honest I was very bored .. I felt interested because he is fit and I’m a muscle mommy so I was like you know what let me just text people who are like me,
They have the same interest why not.

so obviously he added me back. I texted him first cause why not? And he snapped me. I snapped him back. He saw my bicep and he was like crazy and he just disappeared and then he was like you’re low-key bigger than me and then I said i wouldn’t say so. then he snapped me. I snapped him again showing my face for the first time and this guy just left it on open and then he posted a story saying this girl thinks she’s mogging she thinks she’s a 10 out of 10 but she’s a 6 out of 10

I’m so confused because I never actually talked about my looks. He’s snapping me. I’m snapping him why he got so bothered to the point where he just left it on open and posted the story?

Any advice

I love neck kisses, but i realised most guys i asked them to.. didn’t like it or would ignore that i want neck kisses. I realised most of them complained abt the perfume taste. Should i stop spraying perfume? Or thats a normal thing they’re using it as an excuse.

That time i literally s his dih and it smells bad and it tasted salty. But i didnt say anything its normal i think.. he was complaining abt the perfume🙄

Any advice?

Share ur opinions

So i did cut off most people. I was genuine and open , i allowed people to show me the real them. I couldn’t tolerate it. This year i experienced alot of chaos. Cheating,abuse,lying,backstabbing. By all means.

I didn’t do anything i just left. Even with no explanation some dont know that i found out what they did. I literally just left.

Now im left alone. The ones i deeply loved are gone.
Everytime i reach for connection its like someone slaps me.
Now i feel defeated.

I got good grades, all distinctions my family are good to me ( strict asf) but i still appreciate them . Doing a voluntary role in a professional field. Ive been going gym for a year and i improved alot.

I still feel like you will never be the winner. It sounds corny but i feel exactly like this song “the winner takes it all” by Abba

I feel in everyone’s story. You will be the loser in ur own story . no matter what you do there isn’t such a thing as the winner in life. You see someone who has the best relationship with everyone but then in a professional field they were defeated and they’re fighting to get money and if it’s not about money and social life it’s their mental health and if it’s not it’s their mental health its their physical health and if it’s not all of that at the end we all will be gone.

I was a girl that had morals and not in way like oh i should be untouchable blah blah. I actually cared about most people and i dont judge so i wanted to experience smth meaningful and real and thats why i had standards .

I was alone for long and i was trying to improve myself. I started goinf gym and focusing on myself, in my head i knew i will be with someone whos worth it and worth trying everything with for the first time.

I met a guy at the gym was helping me with my form he said its bad . And just to make it short.. he ended up helping me with everything and he left his friend. From that we started talking. This guy was so excited about me he was talking about everything , he was flirting , and just gave attention.

We kept texting and texting and he was respectful and just wanted to take me out and spend time with me . So we went on dates. Hes interesting. So then we got together. I wanted him to open up , cz whats the point of being together if i dont know u. Gradually he was asking me to go to his place or send stuff for valentine (tiktok vids ) which was a month ahead. So i was making it clear like i wont do something if he didnt open up.

When we went out we were talking abt smth deep
And i was asking a question cz i wanted to know him better ( i was inexperienced) he suddenly kissed me . I was serious i was talking asking questions but boom someone grabbed my head and kissed me .
I moved and he was staring at me awkwardly he was disappointed. And he kept texting like oh we need to do this again blah blah.
I took it as a funny thing I wasn’t embarrassed but he was acting all cringey.

After that he started ghosting me or ignoring me
And it was his birthday 2 days after . So i wanted to see him , he acting like he was confused like “ what do u want to see me for “ or “ i dont have time”
So i kissed him and he turned his head like kot even looking at my eyes.

After that he kept asking me to go to his place but i refused.

In the relationship this guy was paranoid telling me abt how he wasted his money with his ex and how he didn’t want to do this again.

I only wanted connection with him .

He then told me he cant be with me hes working on himself and he needs time and then hell be ready for me.

No contact…. For 6 months
He was my first .. he left cz i didn’t want to go to his place and he didn’t want to open up , but i already fell for him and i realised all the morals i had are meaningless.

He came back until eventually i went to his place. I was 1 of 200 that he had.

I ghosted him till tdy.

I realised nth matters and no one cares.

So basically i added a guy on insta. He had a gym pfp and i was like “i f with that” . Then i posted a gym story and he replied asking questions abt gym and stuff. We had a small convo and he said icl ur cute why dont we go for a gym session. So i agreed cz lowkey i was like why not atleast we share same interests maybe we can be friends or i will find out.

Tbh i didnt have expectations or anything in my head its just ill have some fun time. So then he suggested like why dont we just go somewhere before gym. So i agreed cz why not. So after that we had good deep convos . Tbh i was enjoying it but not in a romantic way or like i wanted him. Its more that i finally found someone to share my thoughts with.

So he kept giving me eye contact, lowkey i wasn’t attracted like i didn’t like his looks, and i didn’t feel the vibe i was repulsed. Then the next day we also went out. He started talking abt relationships and out of nowhere he was like “ how many times u gave a head” i said im not comfortable answering it and i wanna keep it private .

So then i wanted to pay for myself cz tbh im not interested like i like him but not in way that i want to be in a relationship. So i told him mid convo that i dont want to be in a relationship ( i was generally speaking obv)
So then he acted normal. Went to the gym he became abit weird . I also acted weird like i was dissociating and i felt numb like i couldn’t think or talk or anything . So i started being sarcastic 99% of the time and i was jk i was like my name isn’t(_) its that (_) and because i was saying it so casually and i was numb he believed it and he became very uncomfortable and he was like wdym
I was like im being sarcastic. And he was just concerned i can see it in his eyes cz he doesn’t know if most stuff was sarcastic or not.

Then i asked him for help with the machine i said “ can u help me my guy” he said “ dont ever say my guy” i was like wdym he said “ im not ur guy” i was like “ my friend “ he was like im not ur friend i was like what do u want me to say . He said nth just ask for the help already.

And this guy had some beliefs abt women should do this and that men should do that blah blah. I dont like this shi. Im more like a 50 50 person.

But yh after this we just snap but nth to serious and he still asked me to go out again. Then he reposts stuff abt him not believing woman and men can be friends.

So like do u think im weird? Or do u advise

Its worth it read it so you learn abt how people are professional liars

So i met a guy at the train station.before me continuing just wanted to tell u abit about my current situation, ive been single for about 6 months and with almost no friends or talking stages . So im 99% alone , still peaceful and im focused, but i keep thinking about past relationships and people or situations that already ended. So i wanted smth “for the plot” or just smth to break the pattern like how cheat meals does to ur body… but also i dont mind getting to know someone in a serious way.

So suddenly at the train station a very handsome guy game to me and gave me a compliment, he was the same age as me, and was good looking. He spoke to me while i was waiting for my train. Turns out we were from the same country and it was surprising. After the talk (it was for abt 15 min) he said id like to take you out . Obv i didn’t give an answer so he said “ hey i cant force u to like me if u dont like me then u dont” i was like its not that its just just met you.

Long story short, we texted for 4 hours at night talking about everything, he related to me abt so many stuff even before me giving my opinions what he said was relatable. I felt attracted. Tbh we did flirt and kindda gave the vibe that we wanted to makeout. I knew that its not serious but also I didn’t have bad intentions, in my head its a mutual thing were looking for the same thing.

The next day we went out. The plan was me and him going for a walk after uni. His house was very close to my uni, he was lazy and he said just for lunch time can u come for couple of mins and i will change u wait then we leave. So in my head i thought hes not that crazy to do smth maybe he actually wants to change. The second i got there he started kissing, i paused i was like “what immediately?” And he was offended. We eventually made out …. On his bed .

I went back for my last lesson. I felt like wow he said he wants to take me out for a date but this guy just wants this. I wasn’t really mad cz i already wanted smth for the plot. But he lied .. but i blame myself for going anyways.

Then when we met again after my last lesson, he realised my energy shift. He wanted to get me coffee so we can talk… i didn’t let him pay . I was repulsed like dont even pay man. So we sat he kept asking me questions like “ whats wrong” “ idont want u to leave me” “stay”
Looking at my eyes, kissing my hand. He said he wants to take me out on a real date and he didn’t want to lose me and it wasn’t his intention.

I didn’t believe any of it so i was “ did u lie abt anything in the chat” cz the day before i asked him if he was in any relationship or talking stages and all his responses was “no” and that hes celibate. So he said no i didnt lie abt anything and started kissing my forehead . I was like dont take in personal but u seem like ur the type of guy that goes from girl to girl.

Anyways we spent 10 hours together, made out again.

When i went back home i saw a girls pic that he reposted, i checked her profile boom… 3 days ago highlights her and him kissing, she wrote “all mine”
You dont know what i felt when i saw it its like wow im not surprised but how can u lie about everything?

I texted him and i said so i proved myself right , he acted like he doesn’t know what im talking about i was like “ its the end of the performance no need to lie” i sent the pic. Out of nowhere he stared deleting every single message he went crazy… i called he didn’t answer. Then he was like its all bcz of my friends they said she doesn’t like me blah blah. I said i dont wanna hear this bullshit ur f up i lowkey dont care , it was just for fun just dont tell me abt ur bullshit. He said i understand and deleted me like nth happened.

Everytime i remember how i didnt lie abt anything and how i was genuine and the whole time he had a gf and he was kissing my hand saying “ i didnt lie abt anything i want smth serious “ i go crazy.

What did i do wrong? Why he did this

Tbh this post is abit random its 2 am and im thinking.
I realised everytime i date someone or just by my last relationships that i never actually enjoyed lip kisses . I almost dont feel anything its like there isnt any sensation.

I only enjoyed and felt extremely satisfied and relaxed by neck kisses .. but also most guys ive been with didn’t like kissing my neck .. they never said this to me but i sensed it . I dont know if its because i told them that i love neck kisses and they just want me to ask more.. or smth is wrong. Also when i directly ask them they dont really tell me why they dont want to kiss my neck .. but sometimes they say they can taste the perfume

Just wanted to ask for opinions …