u/Tiredof304s

I need the input of the ladies for this one.

I work in an office environment and there's this guy who is very well dressed, easy going, friendly and cordial. He is fairly young, fit and married. He is also clearly, the office's eye candy for the ladies. I constantly catch them looking at him wether he is passing by or just on his desk and they are the ones passing by (his desk is away from halls/pathways. These ladies literally walk straight while turning their heads 90 degrees to stare at this dude throughout their walk for SECONDS as in 10 seconds). Nothing crazy or creepy, right?

Here's the part I'm not getting. When he is interacting with the female coworkers, they either have this blank (sort of RBF) expression or they literally have a disgust expression (might as well have "EWWW" written on their forehead). And no, he is not a dork. He is very smooth even when talking to guys.

Any insight on this? Are they repulsed by this guy? They dont smile when they look at him. Are they trying some weird hard to get? I doubt it since they don't actually approach him. What is going on?

It's seems everyone knows we have to manage upwards, yet not many admit their reports are actively doing this too. Do you try to find out? Do you take action? (i.e. talk to them, try to change so they don't have too, or do you lean on it?).

Once you're aware of it, how do you react?

What's the right way to communicate more resources are needed? It seems to me executives don't take these sort of comments positively. Instead they take it as people complaining rather than an actual observation. We've lost 4 leaders this las month from different departments (2 we're in the same). This last leader kept saying we needed more resources (more internal people) to handle all the sourcing of our med device components and purchases. Now they are gone. All these leaders left, no one was fired.

So I'd like to know how do people successfully escalate and communicate these type of issues. What kind of message or tone gets the results?

I think my leadership is just blind or deliberately ignoring all these leader churn.

If there's 2 candidates and one is an ideal candidate but has multiple offers should I try to compete with the other offer or just pass and hire the mediocre candidate?

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I'd like to know what's the best move here. Candidates that already have a job, are highly paid or excel in their fields (even at a young age) tend to ask for a lot and are very particular. Does that make them less desirable to hiring managers? How can I get them for cheaper? Or should I just go with average candidates and save myself the hassle?

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Even from a candidate's perspective, it seems being too good is actually a negative.

I'm trying to navigate managers that don't know my field (EE) and want to convince me that everything electrical should be handled by me (from digital to analog, cybersecurity, firmware, software, power electronics, EMC, layout). It seems to me they are just dumping all they work he doesn't understand on me (he is a MechE). My problem is, hypothetically speaking, if I could handle all these tasks how much more would I be paid? I'd imagine he would have to understand them to know how valuable I would be. But if he understood them, he wouldn't ask it from just one person.

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So how do you handle ignorant managers? And as a manager, how do you differentiate a technically impressive engineer vs an average one when you don't know the field?

How did the manager handle it? Was the manager your report? What input did you give them? What happened to the high performer?

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I'm trying to understand the dynamic between manager and their tech leads and or high performers. What does a good relationship between these two look like. What can the manager do to improve this dynamic?

I've noticed my manager (VP) keeps asking/expecting me (mid level engineer) to own more and coordinate projects that don't fall under my role. I've been an engineering manager before, so I know how to handle this and influence others. I'm also capable in presenting, directing, soft skills and technical. But it just got me thinking, my pay is the same as other mid level engineers, heck I do more than senior engineers.

What would be the benefit of taking these responsibilities in your eyes? Do executives do this just to get free labor out of you?

Objectively speaking, why would I take on more if I keep having the salary/growth conversation and keep being told I'm too young to promote or that i have to "prove myself" but when it comes to responsibilities I should do more than what he asks of others?

I work in engineering R&D. My boss is asking me work related question on a work holiday (memorial day). Maybe I'm not understanding something. But, why would a manager do this?

I want to understand this concept more. I've had occasions where I avoided all possibilities of being sabotaged by my current employer when changing jobs. They have all asked me where I'm going next and I either lie or don't tell. But really, what could they do? I've had managers that CLEARLY dislike me and when they found out about me accepting another offer, they tried to keep me. I don't get it. In your experience, what have your managers/ coworkers done to prevent you from moving. Also, why would they want to keep you if they dislike you (or behave like they dislike you)?

I'm (28M) an Electrical engineer with 4ish YOE and a masters. I've been in 3 companies, in the first one I got a raise of 20% within the first 6 months, left at 10 months for 50% increased salary. In the second job I got promoted to manager after a year and 15% raise. Left after 2.5 years (company was going down) took another role a week after for a 15% increase in total comp. I've been 6 month here and since month 1 I've been pushing for a promotion/salary adjustment as I'm in an individual contributor role but there's a clear leadership gap that no one wants or can fill.

I've spoken to my manager about it but he doesn't seem like he wants to help me get the position. He even told me to "grow some gray hair" and "wait for 18 months" yet he keeps asking for my advice on political and technical matters (he is a VP). He's recently pushing for me to do his job responsibilities and for me to lead the product development, so I asked for a career matrix or a written plan of my growth (I don't want to work extra for free or for an empty promise). The man just keeps dodging the conversation and never says anything concrete. I just received an offer from another company as a lead for 10% increase in total comp. I would like to stay with the current company but this manager is difficult, lazy, lacks communication skills and actively gets between me and my career growth (at least that's how I see it).

What can I say to him that will increase my chances of getting a higher salary/position? I have a lot of leverage and I want to use it.

I believe im a high performer as my results and promotions show. I'm in very good terms with my key coworkers and other leaders/directors and stakeholders (they have invited me individually to dinners/lunches and vent to me). I think my manager just dislikes that i dont suck up to him and that I call him out (privately) when he is wrong. Are my expectations too high?

Hi managers,

Like the title says. Do you have stories of dealing with what you labeled as underperformed? But when they moved on they went to FANG or a higher title. Did it ever make you reevaluate how you read people? What did you learn?

I (M28) have a female coworker (F26) whom I talk to here and there from time to time. No crazy chemistry or anything. Yesterday she invited me to rock climbing near our job for our lunch break. I like being active so I said yes and also she is very relaxed so it just sounded like a way to destress halfway through work for me.

We carpooled to the gym and during the ride she told me her husband was gone for a month due to his job. Now I might not be the best at reading cues, but everytime I said I liked something she would say she liked it too. She was very supportive when I vented about some irritating situations at work (we are in different departments) and normally I wouldn't think too much into it but during the climbing (bouldering) she seemed a bit over showing of her... attributes. Now, it's a gym and you're climbing... so it's hard not to show anything. Maybe I'm reading too much into it? She wants to keep taking me with her now, she even offered to use guess passes for me (boldering isnt cheap). Girls... am I reading too much into this?

This is why I didn't want to address the guys XD

I WILL NOT OR WILL NOT TRY TO FUCK HER. I would like the perspective of girls because I know all guys will immediately go to "she wants you" but honestly I don't trust guys on how girls communicate interest unless it's blatant. And I also KNOW FOR A FACT I'm not THAT attractive to have younger girls pay for me to try to get in my pants, specially not married ones.