u/Tough-History7518

Hot take: As someone who's been part of and also rejected by Toronto's "cool" gen z gay groups, I find the dynamic pretty toxic at times. These "in" circles tend to be cliquey and quick to judge people's belief systems, appearance, or fitness level. I get that you can't force anyone to be friends with you, but it stings a bit because I always looked up to the older gay community as being welcoming and inclusive and not another version of high school.

I'm fairly fit and outgoing, and I genuinely enjoy being friends with anyone, regardless of where they fall on those unspoken social scales, whether they're straight, more introverted or don't fit a certain physical standard. But the second I bring around friends who don't fit the standard these "cool" gays expect, both they and I get side eyed or straight-up excluded for it. I've even caught myself abandoning my own beliefs just to fit in, which I know is on me.

In a community that's supposed to be about acceptance, I hate that part of my generation of gays. Anyway, this is just a rant, please don't come at me too hard for it.

Hey everyone!

I'm trying to create a proper foyer/entryway in my apartment to stop dirt from getting tracked into the living area, but the layout is awkward.

When you walk in, the front door opens into a narrow hallway. The guest bathroom is immediately on the left side of the entrance (right of the photo). The kitchen is also on the left of entrance and the living room starts right after the hallway.

My goal is to create a "shoes off" zone so dirt stays near the front door instead of being tracked through the apartment, but I'm struggling to define the foyer area because of the bathroom location.

Has anyone dealt with a similar layout? Looking for ideas on:

• Where to place a shoe rack or shoe tray (right now its in the closet on the right of the entrance)
• How to visually define a foyer in a small apartment
• Ways to keep dirt contained without blocking the bathroom door

https://preview.redd.it/xx5tro84t89h1.png?width=1080&format=png&auto=webp&s=9b7b7eda24fb7b6edfa00bebd37f3ffe79818e9f

For those who have done both, is the train worth paying double for the extra comfort? I’m traveling solo and don’t mind spending more if the experience is noticeably better (comfort, Wi-Fi, ability to work, reliability, overall stress level). The bus would save me about $90.
If you’ve taken both, which would you choose and why?

It started when I saw my... someone I had a complicated history with, where things ended horrifically. It involved me getting blast out drunk and trying to kiss him, he said no, and I crashed out on him and went to random people next to him, telling them how horrible he is and that he wont kiss me. I also crashed out on my bestfriend, his friends and some randoms, from what I was told.

Fast forward six months of blocking each other on social media and random run-ins where small arguments or stares would arise. Everything unraveled this weekend, where we had another run in at a party. Unfortunately, this time the vodka sodas were telling me to let loose, and then he approached me and was kinda flirty, I flirted back, and we kissed and more, unfortunately.

He came back to mine, and at first it was fun. We were doing oral, and I made it clear I didn’t want to fuck. But after fingering me, he kind of just put it in anyway. It felt good for maybe a second, and then after the second thrust he asked, “Is this okay?” I said, “No,” and lightly pushed him off. As if everything hadn’t already fallen apart, he kissed my best friend at the party too.

Over the next two days, he called me and apologized for crossing the boundary I had clearly set during sex. At first, I brushed it off and thanked him for apologizing. After his second call, I sent him a long message calling him out for everything: the half assed apologies, trying to make me jealous by bringing up his “boyfriend,” saying he still loved me, and kissing my best friend (this happened in our random run ins). He basically blamed my best friend, said my best friend had always been into him, denied trying to make me jealous , and said he would keep his distance because this can’t keep happening.

I then confronted my best friend. We had a long call where I told him how hurt I was, especially because he is such a big part of my life right now and hes heard so much about how this man has hurt me. He seemed genuinely sorry. He said he had never had a fully platonic relationship like ours before, that he values me deeply, and that he understands he jeopardized our friendship. He took full responsibility and said there were no excuses.

I really want to forgive him, but I still feel so much pain and anger from that night. I don’t know how to just go back to normal like nothing happened. Do you think I should forgive my best friend and let it go, or is it okay that I need more time?

TL;DR ran into someone I have a complicated history with, we hooked up, he crossed a boundary I had clearly set, and he kissed my best friend at the same party. He half ass apologized, my best friend apologized too, but I still feel hurt and angry. I want to forgive my best friend, but I don’t know if I’m ready to move on like nothing happened.