u/TropaeolumNasturtium

The prognosis is not good for my grandfather. I was awake for 36 hours because there were no interpreters on staff at that hour. He's now getting palliative care and I feel so guilty because I needed to shower and sleep and eat. I'm anxious to go back and wait. Is it normal to wait 24/7 do people leave to care for themselves?

Hey so I have a friend in Shanghai that makes custom furniture she said he can have it designed and made but I'd have to figure out the logistics of how to get it to Canada.

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I'm not even sure where to begin to look because I'm guessing I'll need it shipped by sea but then I'd need a local company to deliver to my condo.

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Any advice or information on where to look? I saw on IG there's logistics brokers but I don't know if thats a ripoff.

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Thanks!

This is going to be a hot take. But anyone think Sarah somewhat sus? Don't get me wrong, I wish Bear could see Sarah is a great person and they get together and happily ever after... but there was this feeling while watching the movie where it seemed, like Bear, she also didn't have the guts to confess to Bear. And when Bear got with Nikki, Sarah seemed to squeeze in small jabs about Nikki.

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The scene before the "sandwich" where Sarah leans her head on Bears shoulder... I dunno, seems weird knowing your friend had a gf. And texting Bear late at night to meet up for something "important" that could have waited in the morning. Again don't get me wrong Bear is the one that caved in, too, and met up with Sarah. I think it kinda hinted he was gonna cheat on Nikki. And to me it seemed like Sarah was also maybe trying to capitalise on their volatile relationship. (Also.. I would NOT be within 100ft of Bear after what happened at the house party, just saying.)

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What do you guys think?

Background: i have a friend group of 10 people in their 30s but its split down the middle of introverts and extroverts. I tend to hang out with the extroverted because they really like trying new things and going out, while with my introverted friends we usually game or have lowkey house parties. One of the extroverted friends, Cindy, met said "friend", Amber (43F) at one of those drop in dance classes and hit it off. Amber is someone with a lot of allergies, overall health problems, and physical disabilities so it's hard for her to makes friends so Cindy wanted to introduce her to the extroverted group. Right off the bat I did not like her, she's someone that has to insert sex jokes all the time, her pride and joy is that she calls herself "wasian" because her great grandmother was asian, she started changing the dynamic of the extroverted group.

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First, because I have an SUV i'm the only person that can fit her electric wheelchair in my vehicle so I'm tasked with giving her rides. She lives 30-45mins from me (i live near city centre), so every outing we have, I spend 2hrs driving minimum. We all try and hang out every sunday for brunch or an activity so its a lot of driving. I asked if maybe her husband can do drop offs and then I have no problems driving her home. But she said "no I don't want to bother him on his day off because he works hard"....Okay?? My friend Cindy, tells me to let it go because her husband works a lot since Amber is on disability.

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Second, the usual hangouts we usually do: camping, hiking, biking, try fancy restaurants cannot happen because Amber physically cannot do those things. With trying new foods, because amber is severely allergic to a lot things, we are limited to restaurants that are willing to accomodate which ends up being vegan restaurants and we dont have a lot of those so we re-hash the same restaurants all the time. With camping, we offered to do a big group (intro/extroverts) cabin trip so we wouldn't have to sacrifice enjoying outdoors. But Amber cannot afford regular cabin trips and she also does not want to stay back with the introverts because the extroverts have more fun.

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Third, I tried to compromise by doing some activities without her and some with her and she said "i dont want that because my last 2 group of friends started doing things without me and thats how i ended up with no friends." And she said we should be doing everything together. Cindy again said to just pity her because she's 40 and basically doesn't get out much and doesn't have friends..etc. I ended up just hanging out with 2 other friends without Cindy and Amber. We did happy hour or cancelled some sunday brunches to go camping. Cindy confronted us about that, I said "if i invited you, then i'd have to invite Amber, and if I invite amber then we'd have to change our whole plans to accomodate Amber."

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The main story: fast forward 3 years, turns out one of the extroverted friends, Kevin, is an alleged pdf file. Kevin, Amber, Cindy all 3 got along quite well, while Cindy was always fighting for Amber, Kevin kept it neutral but still formed a friendship with Amber. So Kevin is a youth pastor (?) or some kind of mentor at the church he goes to... and I started sensing something was off a year ago but couldn't pinpoint it. Kevin annouces he's dating a 19 year old that was apart of his sunday school/bible group! We put 2 and 2 together and we think something has been going on for years because he has group photos with his group and the first time she was in Kevin's group she would have been 16/17. Kevin is 35! And he says they "just started dating". Ya effing right. I reported him to police and I have no idea if an investigation even happened. But I basically cut him off and cut everyone who is willing to stay friends with him. And.. well Amber wants to be friends with Kevin. Her excuse was well **IF** they met at 16 then its the age of consent. And i rebuttal that's not how age of consent works here... she would only be able to sleep with someone 5 years older and it cannot but of someone who had a position of power (ie, pastor). Then she tried to argue "what if they did started liking each other now at 19, she's an adult". I was so done with her, i didnt even like her all that much to be begin with so I cut off and blocked her. And I would not be inviting her to anything anymore and I will not show up to anything shes invited to.

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I did not tell people they couldn't be friends with Amber or not talk to her. I'm ONLY cutting off people who remain friends with Kevin. But I don't think anyone was that close to Amber to begin with aside from Cindy and Kevin. So now Amber is crying and says I can't make her cut off Kevin, Cindy is saying I should pity her because she doesn't have a lot of friends and she was close to Kevin and just give an exception to Amber. And she insinuated that because the "defacto leader" of the friends (i am not, and i've never called myself that and my friends dont think that, I just tend to do all the planning and coordinating) that the others will listen to me if I give Amber a chance. I'm not stopping anyone from being friends with Amber I just don't want to be a part of that.

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Now the whole group (introverted and extroverted) are starting to feel bad and have asked me to just let it go and clearly its obvious I never liked her and I'm using this situation to push her out of the group.

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This is my inner thought: Yes, I do not like Amber for many reasons whether its justifiable or not. And i'll admit it some of it stems from her being disabled but wanting to wedge her way into our group of active people and making us accomodate her 100% of time. Her hobbies and things she finds fun fits better with the introverted group (she loves gaming, chill hobbies...etc). And I think my friends are pressuring me because I've been her "life line". I'm the only one with a big enough car, I do all the planning and researching for places that will be safe for Amber, and deep down I think the friend group knows they wouldn't really do that for Amber once I cut her out.

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I want to ask how do I navigate this situation without having to make an exception to my boundaries?

I've been at said gym for 3 years but my new job has a fully equipped gym so I cancelled this membership. There's 2 month waiting period from the next billing date. March should have been my last billing date. After I signed the cancellation paper, I was told I'd be getting a a confirmation that it's been processed, which I didn't, I e-mailed again and they said end January I should get a confirmation... again I didnt and I e-mail again. This time no one replies. Also the process of even cancelling was difficult because you had to do it in person (even though it's a docusign) but they are only staffed 9-2 weekdays, and they are suppose to be staffed 10-2 on weekends but no one is ever at the front desk.

I had a day off on a random weekday so I spoke to someone at the gym about my cancellation and if it got processed because I didn't receive a confirmation e-mail. And the gym app itself says I have an open ended membership. The worker made some calls and they said "yup should be all good but I'll get them to e-mail you". They did not. I've asked 2 more times but they reassured that it's done, and Mar would be my last billing date.

Well I was billed April. I called my bank, they said try contacting the gym first, they ignored my e-mails but active on instagram, I made a comment there, they deleted my comment and replied to my e-mail ASAP and said "sorry about that it should be fixed now". May comes along and same thing. I go through the same thing but this time i'm blocked from IG. Bank reverses the charges but they tell me they can only stop 1 payment and not reoccuring payments (which i don't know if thats true?).

I don't want to close my debit account if I don't have to. I appreciate any advice i can get.