u/Unhappy-Scheme3582

Naka 50+ na ako application from indeed, jobstreet and website ng mga ibang jobs. nasa 15-20 na nagreply and all rejected. i am 30 years old and isa lang job experience ko as an admin assistant and less than a year lang job experience ko don. kaya siguru di ako natatanggap due to gap year ng last job ko. 2 years na ako nakabante due to health and personal reasons. and i'm losing hope na di makakita ng work. at my age pa, it's so pressure.

i wanna say something here

my doctor prescribed me this to feel happier. i am diagnosed with mdd and cptsd, since it's for bipolar meds (i searched it) i am too shy to ask my doctor if possible i have bipolar since she prescribed me this. but it's kinda helping me for my depression. it actually cleared my mind. my thoughts of suicidal and impulsive behaviours have lessen.

yung psychiatrist ko wanted me to admit into psych ward and have an ECT. kaso i have thoughts na maging worst ako if i get admitted.

i did it again a while ago, but it failed again.

i'm so tired naaaa.

my parents will never understand me, i don't trust anyone anymore even my family. i don't feel safe being at home. so much emotional abused.

Sino na na-admit sa jbl psych ward dito? kamusta po don? At may mga activities po ba ginagawa?

marami din ba ang nasa 30 na nbsb dito? Minsan parang nang ccrave ako magka jowa pero the same time parang tinatamad. Random thoughts lang to guys. Haha.