u/Vivid-Plum1240

When I (22) was 17, I was going through a really hard time in my life because of many factors. I was attending counselling sessions which never really helped me, and I was prescribed anti anxiety medication.

After my first month of taking them and getting a new box, I decided one afternoon to just take all of them. In my mind it was almost a game to me, like I just remember thinking to myself "oh, I could take another, and then another", and so on.

I just sat on my sofa for about half an hour just thinking about what I had done, and at some point my cat sat on my lap and I just didn't even know what to think. I eventually ended up calling an ambulance on myself and I was taken to hospital where they called my parents and flushed my system and had a metal health team speak to me. Following this day I began to self harm and that really gave me a rush that I hadn't felt before, and it continued on for a few months before I eventually stopped because it stopped giving me that feeling.

But this day just haunts me because I cannot figure out if I genuinely wanted to die or if I was just attention seeking because I was a teenager. I just can't believe I called an ambulance on myself, like who does that after they've just tried to overdose?

I feel so much shame and embarrassment when I think back to this and I just want to erase it from my memory so badly.

I still struggle with suicidal thoughts now, and I do have moments where I relapse with my self harming because I get that same sick feeling of happiness seeing it on me.

I just really needed to get this out there I've never spoken to anyone about this because I feel so disgusting.

I find life so hard. I always have and I think I always will. I've never been a particularly happy or cheerful person no matter how hard I try.

I'm constantly in a cycle of feeling like I'm doing really good and working on myself before absolutely crashing and burning into a depressive episode that completely consumes me. And without fail, I constantly think about how often I want to everything to end.

I've tried to express this to my parents before, but my dad shuts off when things get too hard and my mom has been telling me she doesn't want to hear it because she's also not doing great because she hates her job and my dad is lazy.

I really think it would be better for everyone if I weren't around anymore. I cause too much stress for my parents because I have so many health issues and personality issues, and I never have any genuine friends because I have such an ugly personality and I'm too needy and sensitive.

I've tried to speak to my friends about how I'm feeling but constantly I was ignored or never taken seriously, despite all the times that I had been there for them when they were struggling. A situation happened between me and my closest friends about a month ago and we haven't really spoken since.

I have some things in life that I'm passionate about, but everything requires money and I don't think I'll ever be at a point of financial success. And what is the point if I'm always going to be ugly and alone?

I find life so hard. I always have and I think I always will. I've never been a particularly happy or cheerful person no matter how hard I try.

I'm constantly in a cycle of feeling like I'm doing really good and working on myself before absolutely crashing and burning into a depressive episode that completely consumes me. And without fail, I constantly think about how often I want to die.

I've tried to express this to my parents before, but my dad shuts off when things get too hard and my mom has been telling me she doesn't want to hear it because she's also not doing great because she hates her job and my dad is lazy.

I really think it would be better for everyone if I weren't around anymore. I cause too much stress for my parents because I have so many health issues and personality issues, and I never have any genuine friends because I have such an ugly personality and I'm too needy and sensitive.

I tried to speak to my friends about how I'm feeling but constantly I was ignored or never taken seriously, despite all the times that I had been there for them when they were struggling.

I have some things in life that I'm passionate about, but everything requires money and I don't think I'll ever be at a point of financial success. And what is the point if I'm always going to be ugly and alone?

If there were no repercussions, I don't think I would even hesitate.

I find life so hard. I always have and I think I always will. I've never been a particularly happy or cheerful person no matter how hard I try.

I'm constantly in a cycle of feeling like I'm doing really good and working on myself before absolutely crashing and burning into a depressive episode that completely consumes me. And without fail, I constantly think about how often I want to die.

I've tried to express this to my parents before, but my dad shuts off when things get too hard and my mom has been telling me she doesn't want to hear it because she's also not doing great because she hates her job and my dad is lazy.

I really think it would be better for everyone if I weren't around anymore. I cause too much stress for my parents because I have so many health issues and personality issues, and I never have any genuine friends because I have such an ugly personality and I'm too needy and sensitive.

I tried to speak to my friends about how I'm feeling but constantly I was ignored or never taken seriously, despite all the times that I had been there for them when they were struggling.

I have some things in life that I'm passionate about, but everything requires money and I don't think I'll ever be at a point of financial success.

If there were no repercussions, I don't think I would even hesitate.

PLEASE please help me 🙏🙏 if anyone has any success stories please. I'm so desperate

I've always wanted this, but I want it more than ever now. I wish my stomach was flat and my thighs were toned. I look at girls around me with so much envy because how are their legs so tiny? Where are their organs? I hate being fat so much. I just wish I was skinny.

Hi everyone! I was just wanting some tips on how to manifest good grades, however, I benefit greatly from having things clearly explained to me. I thought it could be worth putting this out there for any potential tips rather than overloading & overwhelming myself with so many different posts. Thank you!