u/WittyJelly6409

And does anyone else commute from that area?

I haven’t been going as often lately. I just don’t feel great with it. It’s sad stories. I do kinda feel like an outsider because everyone like connects the book to different parts and like have stuff memorized.

I went to college and now I’m working and trying to figure out university and I just feel kinda alone with it. A lot of people are in their 30s and I just got in my mid 20s.

I just feel alone in the rooms, the stories are sad and I know I’ll always be an alcoholic but I don’t want to think about drinking anymore. I just wish I could be normal and not have to hear sad stories and idk. I’m venting.

I have decided I don’t want to do what I originally applied for. I already got accepted for it but I was wondering if I could add a second program now and accept that instead and still start in Fall 2026.

Or is it too late?

I noticed I don’t feel confident writing the ABC data that I need to. There’s so much happening in a session that I don’t even know which behaviour to be writing. There was an incident where a kid reached in the toilet and tossed out water then touched there face, later on in the washroom they hadn’t left but wouldn’t put on clothes and was avoiding putting on their clothes. I didn’t even know what the write for the antecedent or consequence. Or even how to word the Behaviour. This is something I really need practice with. I think it didn’t help that I felt a bit rushed. All that happened and then someone came to cover since it was my lunch break and my supervisor told me to write the ABC data while I was rushing out for my lunch break. Still if I had practice it wouldn’t take as much thought to figure out how to write it all correctly.

What do you do when it feels like so much happened before the behaviour? And just how can I get better at writing ABC data in general?

Any advice is appreciated!!

I need it for nostalgia purposes

It wasn’t like a full cry, just tearing up. I had a rough session. The kid hit a lot, pulled my hair and was dysregulated for a LONG period of time. It’s a 4 hour session and I’m only a month into the job. Anyways this is my first full week of working as well. (Was working 3 days before).

Anyways I was writing the notes and was my supervisor walk by and just asked like hey this was hard and I’m feeling emotional, is that normal? And she talked with me and I teared up. She said next time to call for help and I will. I’m hard on myself when I make mistakes and feeling embarrassed for getting emotional. It was just a lot and I’m on lunch now just cooling down. I feel better but I feel ashamed for not calling for help sooner and for getting emotional. I don’t want them to think I’m not cut out for this. It was just a rough morning. I’m glad I got to learn from this though.

This was kind of just a vent but has anyone else gotten emotional during this work? Especially in their first bit of time working?

My sponsor who has 29 years told me to wait until 5 years (she waited 13 because she was still really sick when she came in), my other friend with 15 years said the same thing. Then there’s another town near me where my buddy goes to meetings and their sponsor that has 3 years and their grand sponsor who I think has like 5-6 years says if you don’t sponsor you’ll relapse. Like the reason people go back out is that they’re not sponsoring.

Anyways when I said I wasn’t going to sponsor for 5 years to my friend they said, you might not make 5 years then. We both have 1.5 years.

Anyways what do you think about it? Do people that don’t sponsor relapse or is there other ways to be of service? I’m confused.

I feel like I don’t know how to have a conversation. I end up talking about myself or making an embarrassing loud joke (my dad does stupid shit and it rubbed off on me but he doesn’t get embarrassed/anxious), just all the things I do make me anxious. I only feel calm when I’ve been at home for like 2 weeks. Being sick can be a blessing at times. Now I just omg plus my worry about how males think I’m weird doesn’t help or even just girls too (24f). So much worry and anxiety all the time.

It was better for a while but it’s back to this everyday again. It’s like this or I’m irritated. I get happy but then I get loud or excited and do something that draws attention to me and I end up with the anxiety again. I have no in between. I’m struggling.

I’ll be nervous or intimated or uncomfortable and end up oversharing and then that’ll cause more anxiety because I overshared. Then I worry about the consequences of me oversharing. I feel annoying and weird. It’s just a spiral. It’s not as bad as it used to be but new situations like I have a new job and I had my first review at it today ends up triggering it.

So stressed out…

I’m new to this field. I got hired after doing my placement at this centre and after a month of actually working I had my first review and.. just I know it went bad. I’m new to doing natural environment teaching as well. It’s so nerve racking. I was placing demands when the kid was no longer paying attention which wasn’t great and I realized it after. This kid I got my review with is new for me. I had another staff member model some stuff for me to help me learn. I’m dedicated to learning but it’s still scary. I want to do the best I can and keep learning but I still am nervous that I’m not cut out for this.

Did anyone get a bad first review but able to improve? Can I ask for a copy of the review they’ll be using to “mark me” so I can see myself what I need to work on?

could go into a whole thing about how I’ve been working on my fear of authority but that’s for another sub Reddit.. I understand it’s part of the job and I am definitely better at taking feedback then I would’ve been a few years back but I still want to hear from people in the field.

My supervisor who was doing the review was awesome. She kept reminding me it was my first review and that she was in my position once. I work with really great people. After my review I was yapping to her how how I understand it’s a big responsibility working with kids with autism and I just want to do the best I can because there’s parents at home who are trusting me with their child and although I’m not their whole treatment, I am a part of it and I want to be giving the best care that I can.

(Sorry some of this was just rambling)