u/YeOldeToledo

Moving to Chatham-Kent soon and wondering if any writing groups?

Just frustrated right now.

Spouse and me just had an argument about their behaviour when dealing with our finances.

We are on baby step 2 and it doesn’t seem like how much we talk about the plan, the budget, our financial future my spouse keeps spending in secret.

Today, my spouse went out to do some shopping. Last night we spoke about what needed to be bought and not to deviate from that list.

Well, when getting home from work I asked how the shop went. To make a long story, they opened another credit card because of a “deal”. That was it.

This isn’t the only time something like this has happened. It seems every time I’m asked what we should do they go out and do the exact opposite.

I told them that I cannot financially trust them. It’s that simple. It’s hard that we are already trying to swim against a current with our debt and then my spouse decides to do something that puts us back by months.

I’m more venting than anything but I also just don’t know what to do anymore.

😮‍💨

Just wanting to know if any other men are out there that are similar.

It wasn’t until a mental breakdown and diagnosis of PTSD at 25 that I was told my life experience was not normal.

Sexual abuse, homelessness, violence, abusive partners, and too much more. I’ll joke that life became “normal” at 27 because that was the first time in my life that I was able to get away from everything and truly start over. Alone but safe.

As a survival mechanism I’m detached from the world, the people, and the events that happen in my life. It’s not that I’m emotionless, I’ve experienced a lot of emotion but have no empathy for things.

On paper life is good. Married, children, a home, went from being a high school drop-out to having a Masters, very steady employment. It’s just that even the “milestone” events were lost on me.

I don’t think I’ll ever adjust to being a “normal” person, emotionally. It’s not a numbing but a lack of caring about things.

It’s been almost 20 years since I’ve been told that my emotional baseline was not the norm and I don’t believe at this point I’ll ever adjust.

Men that have been through similar how did you either reach a place of emotional normality or at least cope with a lack of…importance…for life.

Just wondering what "strange" things you've done since entering the Church.

Myself...I talk to the animals about God and the Creation. Wife was wondering what I was saying to a turkey today.