u/Zealousideal-Bag5991

Hi there. I'm not sure if anyone has experience with this, but I can't seem to find much online. I'm playing in sandbox as admin and we have a new non-posting book set up for this, but it doesn't appear that we can associate a non-primary book to an asset type. If anyone has knowledge or can point me in the right direction, it would be greatly appreciated. Also, love that we are trying to tackle this at quarter close LOL. 🤯

My husband and I have been married for just over four years. We get along pretty well, and none of our pain points have ever actually been a big deal. It's where do we want to eat, how much do we want to spend on this trip, things like that. We do not have kids, so I feel like we don't have a lot of challenges. We really haven't had difficult conversations, so I'm in foreign territory here. I need to make my concerns known, but I really don't want to point fingers or blame because I know I'm human too. I don't think my husband even knows that he's hurting me, so I really just want to air this out so we can move forward.

My little issues are compounding into me feeling like I'm not being seen or heard in the relationship. I think I set myself up for it over the years saying I don't have a preference between x or y, this trip or that. I try to be easy going unless something actually matters. Recently, however, it feels like my preferences are being totally dismissed and now that I've noticed, it feels like I'm being crushed.

Are few examples: on a recent trip to Hawaii I had a preference to go to Oahu and my husband wanted to go to Kauai. When he booked, he booked his preference. I said it was fine since that trip was over his birthday. No big deal. Twice this year I've needed to drop my car off for and oil change or other work and, despite us living about a mile away, I had to have my mom give me a ride once, and today I walked back home. He's not too busy, he just seemed very put out be me trying to have him help, so I said I'd handle it myself. Again, not a big deal. Whenever I say I am craving this one place to eat, he said it doesn't sound like something he wants, so we have not gone. Still not a big deal, but one more chronic instance of this. It's me subconsciously feeling like my preference or opinion is stupid.

There are two more to make my point. We take a trip each fall for fall colors. This year he wanted to go during a week where I have some fun work events and an out-of-state coworker/friend will be here for said events. I asked if we could do a week earlier, later, or leave mid-week so I could be involved in some of the work events. No, no, no. Fall colors do have a small window, but we do this every year and it's never exactly predictable. That was hurtful.

Lastly, I just finished my degree and he doesn't seem to care in the slightest. I had to ask him to congratulate me. He's not an emotional guy, but I graduated with a second degree at 40 with summa cum laude. I was hoping he'd share some excitement. Sunday I told him I applied for a graduate program. I'd mentioned wanting to before, and he never really said anything. This time he said No. There was no discussion really. I said I'd be paying myself, and I might take out a small loan so I can also stay on track with other financial goals. He got a little nasty and said he didn't want me to do that, he already pays $500 extra a trip (twice a year). First of all, he'd never told me that. And I pay thousands more in taxes. Aren't we a team? IDK, that felt like a massive slap in the face, so now I'm festering. This feels like not only does my person not care about my dreams and aspirations, but also I'm upset that it was a hard no as though he can dictate my life.

I'm starting to feel unseen and unloved in my marriage. I am not going to leave him, that's not the right call here. I suspect that when I talk to him, all of this will be a bit surprising to him. Does anyone have ideas how I can be productive here. I don't want him to feel like I'm attacking him or blindsiding him.

TL;DR several small situations over the years have reiterated to my husband that my preferences do not matter. Situations mentioned are generally the small stuff that builds over time. Last week I mentioned applying to grad school and instead of a discussion he just said no (even though I'd be paying 100% by myself). I am feeling small and unsupported and part of that is because I've just let it happen. I feel like I'm starting to be slightly depressed about it, so I need to have a meaningful conversation to course correct. I really don't want to point fingers, but I do need to stand up for myself.

Hope I’m not too ranty here, but I’m at a loss. My husband and I have been married for 4 years, and we align on a lot of values. I work in accounting and I found myself in this space when I was 30 through unconventional means. 6 months after wed, I was challenged at work with something that sparked a greater interest in accounting. I enrolled in classes for a certificate. I do have a ln undergraduate degree in an unrelated field but I wanted to know more. 3.5 years later I just finished a second degree on my own dime. Hubs and I are very aligned financially usually. I make slightly more than him, but I try to equitably split everything. I’m now looking into graduate programs, which will also be on my dime, and he got upset. Not by the time suck or drain in quality time. His concern is that the two times a year he spends $500 more than me on trips. Which I don’t think is accurate because I throw my card at everything since he drives on trips. Even if that were true, two years of that would be $2k for him. We are financially pretty stable so it’s not like we are giving up anything for a couple hundred here and there. We aren’t rich, but not struggling so him shutting me down felt weird. Also, we don’t have kids and will not so we don’t need to consider that here. He’s in arts and I’m in accounting. He asked about pay raises and while I don’t expect wild changes because I love my work and boss, it IS an insurance policy. I cannot understand why he’s pushing back when we aren’t struggling and I contribute a lot. Most bills are 50/50. I do Costco, he does miscellaneous grocery. I do our taxes and generally overpay, but we split refunds. Anyone have insight? Maybe I’m biased, but I think of education as an investment.

TLDR: hubs and I equitably split, I just paid for my education and want a masters, but he’s kind of against it. No kids, not broke.

Hey all. I wanna try something new, and I don't know a ton about skincare despite spending a fair amount on it. I've generally loved Allies of Skin the past few years, but I have recently switched to Marini (I have a friend in the company who gifted a few months' supply). For a long time I've heard excellent things about Skinmedica TNS Advanced serum as well as the Calecim line (serum, multi action cream, and the recovery night complex) and I have no idea which to try. I'm 40 but get asked if I'm 30, I have pretty decent skin with light wrinkling when I smile, but other than some redness I don't have any major concerns. My skin is pretty well hydrated and plump, but I know as I age I will begin to lose elasticity. Anyone with experience with either line (or both), I'd love your feedback.

Hi all. I'm unfamiliar with this record type as I do not work with prepaids. The accounting manager booked an entry which resulted in an amortization schedule from a long term prepaid asset account (very weird because when we make a copy of that, it reverts to the correct account, but I digress). She has now booked an entry to reclass the error, but since this item is on a schedule, I'm not sure what to do. I'm looking at the amortization schedule and I was hoping to see the GL impact or an equivalent on said schedule. It reflects the correct expense account (which makes sense since that part was booked correctly), but I don't see which prepaid account it will bring in. I'm not sure if this is viewable and perhaps my role can't see something, or what else might be going on here. I worked with FAM and I know those all have a schedule and then underlying records, but I don't see tabs to drill down on. I went into Create Amortization Journal Entries, but it only gives high level detail and I'd run through sandbox, but SB is SO SLOW. If anyone has dealt with this, I'd love some feedback. It's on a short schedule so if it's that convoluted then it may not be worth the time, but I thought it might be good to know. Thanks!

Hey all… not sure whether I can find helpful feedback here or if I just need some validation, but here I am. I need help with my husband… we have been together for almost 8 years and married for 4 and while I know I love him, appreciate him, am very fortunate to have found someone who does not emotionally hurt me and with whom I share so many values with… I find myself getting really mad and snowballing. I don’t say any of these things to him because I know it’s a bit unfair to just hold all this in and then unleash. I am a logical person so I can see both sides, but I am emotional so I know anything will come out wrong.

He’s a good guy overall, but I’m his first real relationship, his first “roommate” since he lived with mom and dad until we were married (I’m a few years older). He does all of the big stuff right. I am safe, we are responsible and employed, when I tell him I am struggling and need support, he will hold me. So this is a situation where I do want/need to work it out. However, since I’m his first in so many ways, he is a bit immature or incompatible on a few emotional levels.

Prior to us marrying, his parents somewhat pulled me aside and acknowledged his lack of compassion. I forget the whole conversation, but it’s been at the back of my mind. I’ve been through a lot more (lots of losses and some really, really poor choices), so I don’t want to project my internal dialogue onto him. We are good in so many ways. We have a few issues from my perspective and some are small like he doesn’t ever compliment me. I don’t feel really self-conscious these days but on the day I DO put in effort I have to give him a certain LOOK to elicit a response. Obviously he likes me, we are married, but I do like to hear something nice from time to time. Likewise, if I give him a compliment (ooh, arms looking juicy, why are you so handsome, look at that butt) he just doesn’t really register it or say thanks.

I suppose I am rambling. My husband seems to mostly prioritize his agenda and desires over anything I might need. It’s a laundry list of events, but based on a recent trip… he doesn’t listen to direction when I’m familiar with a place so we missed out on the sunset that he wanted to photograph (doesn’t listen), we got on a really bad one-way road which was super scary (after I told him my brother advised against that route; bro was not specific about WHY, but he did say don’t do it and the outcome was me walking ¼ mile up a one way rode directing my husband how to reverse while I was literally bleeding through my jeans because I’d asked to stop for “supplies” but that was second to taking a 1.5 hour one way plus the backout and return time). (Also, we do a lot of travel photography and I have low expectations, but if we can get a restroom with water, I will always opt for that. Since we travel with dudes, even though he is driving and knows my preferences, I generally have to pee in the woods or outhouses because that’s “faster”.) We were visiting my brother and using his OLD rusted out truck and I asked repeatedly that he not hit speed bumps/humps/tables at 30+ because I was worried about ruining the truck. He continued to do so throughout the trip (oh, and while I had a migraine, it was not my best trip health wise). A lot of my grievances are about his driving. He’s fast, sometimes mad, always tailgates… I’ve expressed so much concern before in the vein of “if you get me killed our dog/my mom will be SO sad” and “why are we in a hurry”.

I don’t want to be a buzzkill, but I hate feeling like when he drives, I’m going to die. I do have this weird fear that I’m going to get killed in an accident anyway (we live in a major city and people are absolutely bonkers), and I do drive responsibly, but I cannot ever persuade him to just calm down a little. On our last trip I kind of (internally) lost it. I have told him before that if he can’t make me feel safe, I will not go on road trips with him. On this recent trip I was thinking of telling him I’m done with road trips entirely because it’s not fair that the person I love most in the world is okay with me actively being scared when he drives. Then I was thinking of positing a “we cannot do road trips together, but I can follow you, what a waste of gas” situation, but that seems lackluster. He gets motion sickness so I cannot just take over the driving for the most part unless I want to pull over for him to vomit. It seems like such a stupid thing to be driving such a wedge for me, but I have a very real fear and I cannot find an effective way to resolve this. I cannot just “get over” my fear. Honestly, it’s turning into a lack of respect issue that really cuts deep.

I don’t want to attack him with this, but I truly feel that he prioritizes what he wants over his care for my sense of well-being. There must be a balance. There are other safety related things pretty much adjacent to this that just make me feel like he considers himself first and my care of my safety second. We went on a helicopter tour last week and while I was fine with it, it turns out that there was a fatal crash within the last week and he didn’t bother to tell/warn me. I only found out because he joked about it when we went to dinner with my brother [crickets]. I’d like to be able to weigh my own risks and not rely on his discernment for that at this point. I jokingly told him that I’m taking out a huge life insurance policy on him when he does that next and he seemingly didn’t register the comment.

I’m aware my tone is probably a bit that I dislike him, but I do not, I’m just finally frustrated enough to bring it to a bunch of strangers because I don’t want to unload on friends or family yet. I’m kind of paranoid about my safety in ways that do not register to him and I need to find a productive conversation forward because attacking him is going to do us no good. Please give helpful advice if you have been in anything similar. He’s great, but we have this glaring blind spot and I don’t want to have an eventual meltdown on him. Also, he’s not a drunk or on any substances that would impair his judgment, he’s just perhaps oblivious and not very emotionally developed… he's a very good man that needs some nudges and I don't want to approach this in the wrong way.

Thanks in advance!