u/_Aperture-Scientist_

My mother was beautiful, but she died. Ever since then, I like to get stabbed on Mother's Day because it makes me feel something, and because I'm a feral magpie who is easily amused by shiny things.

Now I will have doubles of the earlobes, actually, wait no, I have triples. Triples of the earlobes. Yeah. And doubles of the helixes, on both ears so that's kind of quadruples of the helixes.

To my fellow shirt brothers who don't have their shirt mothers today - for whatever reason - I extend my condolences. plate smash Now, go get something shiny for yourself, and make sure you laugh a lot today. That way, when you look back on your life, and remember all the motherless mother's days, you just see yourself having a good time. You deserve it.