u/_crackingfire

I've been through (and am lowkey still going through) an extremely stressful era in my life and have thus gained a relatively significant amount of weight. My friends are the sweetest people on Earth and I love them so so dearly, however they're all skinny and greek god looking that I feel like a morbid entity especially compared to them. I feel like I'm a punishment to look at and I a) don't want to cause even the slightest amount of discomfort to my friends and b) don't want them to potentially worry about me and tbh c) I don't even want them to physically perceive me in any way shape or form. I feel so miserable right now and am also ashamed of what has become of me.

(this might be a lot, sorry :( )

Is this familiar to anyone else? My thoughts are all ober the place but not clear enough to make sense of them and music can't seem to satisfy nor silence them, like it usually would. My solution therefore is, to just chat the living shit out of me till my mind is in a place to lock in finally. Sooo how are you doing? What have you been up to recently? Any nice stories to tell? Or a question to ask?

I know the title might sound strange at first, but it fits my quite specific situation.

So, my native language is Hungarian which is written in latin and has been for a millenia. This, however, wasn't always the case. Up until the adoption of Christianity (1000 ad) a unique runic script was used. This said script is quite well documented today, and I took a class that taught it.

However, I don't really take use of this skill and I've been becoming less and less practiced in it. And this is something I'd like to change, on which I need some advice.

I thought I'd integrate it into my daily routine (mostly by writing, since there's basically zero material in it to read), but quickly realized I wasn't sure how to. Sooo I'm open to suggestions.

A few notes though: I don't study in Hungarian, am not into journaling and am quite terrible at writing stories and such.

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Ich erhalte in ein paar Wochen (wenn alles nach Plan läuft) meinen Realschulabschluss. Ab September soll es weiter in die Oberstufe gehen. Als ängstlichster Mensch auf Erden muss ich mich jetzt schon auf alles Mögliche vorbereiten. Mir ist aber aufgefallen, dass ich das Wissen dafür noch nicht besitze. Bitte helft mir, was erwartet mich? Was wird mal ganz anders oder eher bekannt? Es geht um Baden-Württemberg btw

I internally tie my worth to my appearance. Especially to my weight. I don't think I can ever be happy while possessing a body. My existence in physical space is becoming more and more suffocating every day. (Sorry for incoherence)

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Give me your most unhinged ways and methods to learning a new language's pronunciation. I mean unique stuff noone ever would think about - except for you.

Hi there! Recently I've been feeling completely alone in this world, which planted the thought of seeking connection online. I'm looking for someone who is ready to listen and engage in conversations of rather deeper kinds. I also offer the same. Everyone is welcomed and accepted by me, bonding is the name of the game, so to speak.

My intro:

Luca

18f

She/her

Queer

INTP-T

Hungarian

I love listening to music, especially to Sleep Token. Love love love a good show or movie. I yearn for art and strive to see it in literally anything - also enjoy divining into it as well as practicing it. I generally enjoy spending time with animals more than humans, because I believe they're nature's haunting beauty of purity. Absolutely love going down rabbit holes and endeavor to collect as much knowledge as humanly possible. Sometimes I'm a little too harsh on humanity, but I primarily see myself as a socialist and broadly agree with marxism.

If any of this clicks with you, please feel free to slide into my dms!!🫰🏻