FMLA: if I have 100 hours of sick time and use FMLA the agency will use my sick time first, then vacation pay. So FMLA doesn’t mean not getting paid if I have saved sick and vacation time right?
Also it’s non of there business why I’m sick, what’s the most minimal thing I could say?
Im old, ive dated many males. Some which were respectful of my need for alone time but still wanted more and one that disrespected and disregarded my alone time to the point I couldn’t even get him to leave MY HOUSE (no need to victim blame me, if you were me you’d understand this struggle).
I tell guys on the onset of dating my needs but there is always that one that will manipulate me into thinking I am the problem that they lack respect for my needs.
99% of me has given up just to not risk another ahole trying to suck the life out of me.
I had a doctors appointment at 2 o’clock (a new doctor I never seen).
I get there and wait in the waiting room with a desk and no employees there.
The doctor called me back and said did you not get my text (that they sent at 1:20) that stated to text when arriving at office today?
I go I don’t know I’m autistic and can’t do 2 things at once so my phone notifications aren’t even on EVER. She responds, well you responded to my message last night confirming the appointment moment.
Me: I happened to check my messages then, this isn’t typical. What I thought inside my head…. Is I show up to appointments just fine and on time, however my phone is not an appendages and will never be, I will go without a phone before having a phone that disrupts me throughout the day.
I’m NOT sorry I don’t follow standard protocol that people LIVE ON THEIR PHONES AND AT ANY MOMENT THEY WILL DROP WHAT THEY DO TO TEND TO OTHERS NEEDS.
Anyone else despise the expectations that phones should be appendages or that hate when it rings or vibrates or notifies.
Not asking for medical help, just venting and seeing if anyone has similar experience. First of all it’s a struggle for me to even describe my pain, then when I do it’s ignored by a “professional”.
3 months ago
Me: Hey doctor, I got an injury and it’s causing pain… I’ve done xyz and it still hurts.
Doctor: sounds like nothing is going to help
Me: ya, it’s annoying
<nothing done>
3 days ago
Me: hey doctor, I still have pain from that injury, no one seems to know the fix
Doctor: you’re getting old, you’ll have pain
Me: I’m here to get help
Doctor: I don’t know what else to say <as she is literally getting closer to the door like she doesn’t have time to help me… which I pay for>
Me: I’m tired of being in pain
Doctor: okay, let’s try xyz
So the moral of this story is my doctor won’t help unless I’m tell her multiple times and not take no for an answer. Makes me wonder how many people go without help for a long time because they let the doctor ignore their pleas for help.
I invited someone to do something 3 times, we did the thing 3 times, we both had an enjoyable time. She never made initial contact or invitation, ever.
I saw her at the store, she said multiple times we should go take a bike ride. I said yes let’s do it, this will be fun.
1 year later not a word from her. I stopped contracting her because I felt like I was doing all the coordinating.
I saw her out in public. She goes “what is happening, are you mad at me? you stopped contacting me”. Me “i did stop contacting you, you never contacted me. Am I missing something, how many times have you contacted me”. Her <shocked expression>
I feel like I’m usually to pin cushion… like I’m the blame. Yes, I didn’t contact her but she NEVER contacted me…. even before I stopped contacting her. I REFUSE to be isolated in the blame anymore.
Am I alone?
What am I doing wrong no. Updated iPhone systems. AirPods charged. AirPods reset. Case open. Charged. WiFi on. Airdrop on. Turned on off phone. Bluetooth turned on off.
My jbl speaker also isn’t being located by my iPhone.
My I watch is paired
There is this guy on social media platforms that claims to be an autism expert and doctor, and is dating (or married I’m not sure) to a lady with autism.
Anyhow he posts some things that I read the comments and am shocked no one calls out his BS.
Recently he posted about how there “should be training for people with autism on how to understand other people hidden intentions”.
All the comments were like “great idea”.
But for me I think “why the %#~*^£ isn’t there training for NT to STOP HIDDING THEIR TRUE INTENSIONS”.
It’s so annoying, people with autism are always expected to be trained, learned….
someone will ask me a question or we will just be talking and I’ll share more than I later realize that I want to or “should”.
I don’t know if it’s because I have no one to talk to generally, outside of counseling, or what but I just go on and on and on.
I made 3 orders all last Monday (7 days ago).
1 shipped immediately and I already have the items.
The other 2 haven’t even shipped… as in they haven’t even put them in the mail.
I will never be using Poshmark again.
Example: i use to work at a place where we would go out for lunch every so often, we were kind of a mostly functioning team (which seems rare at work but anyhow…), and we do these team building exercises as such.
There was this one girl that we would walk together to and from lunches sometimes and just BS. We talk about vacations and such. She also loved to paint.
She’d paint coworkers pets (dogs cats rodents etc) just for fun. On numerous occasions she painted peoples pets after the pets passed. I had a cat. Never once did she offer to paint my cat. My cat died. I was heart broken but I got better and continued to work the for a year later with that girl, we’d still do the same stuff. Still no offer to paint my cat though. Mind you, in that last year she’d probably painted 10 or so other peoples pets (she’d show us pictures).
Anyhow, it seems like usually I can’t see the forest thru the trees, or whatever the saying is. Like during the moment I’m like “well she’s still kind to my face so who cares” but later, like months later, I think “I wonder why she never offered to paint my cat”.
In not saying she was obligated too, just seems odd.
On a scale from 0-10 with 0 being miserable and 10 being super happy I’m always a 5-7 when I’m single.
I can’t justify why I would ever be with someone that makes me below 5, EVEN if sometimes being with that person makes me above 7.
I always hear people say in relationships there are good times and bad but the good outweigh the bad. I absolutely don’t see it that way.
I will never again be with someone that makes me a 0-4, even if it’s for a minute. I’m not talking about like if your partner is sick and in the hospital you are sad for a few days, I’m talking about just emergencies aside, they put you in a 0-4.
Am I alone in this thought process?
So I posted some things online for free, items left outside and put my address and said “no appointment needed, come and take what you want. here my number if you want to confirm availability “.
I got a text at 2pm “is it still available” (I didn’t see it, I don’t live on my phone plus have jobs and responsibilities).
The guy called 12 minutes later I get a voicemail “We are in the neighborhood I believe across from the house but it appears nobodys home So I guess well go elsewhere Thank you byebye”.
So he called to tell me he’s not getting the stuff (cause he can’t follow directions or have a little more patience than 12 minutes). Then play some passive aggressive game like he wants me to call him back and beg him to take the stuff. I don’t get the point in calling and telling me he’s leaving and getting free stuff elsewhere.
I don’t understand people! I feel like 90%+ of my communications are with aliens. Am I alone?
I was in this group (about 20 females) I thought the people were kind of friends…. we all had each others phone numbers, we do group activities (there was a schedule, you’d just show up if you wanted to participate).
I’d invite them to do things outside the schedule event, I coordinated it etc, and sometimes they came and they seemed to enjoy themselves “this was fun…”.
They rarely invited me to do things (Ive since made a rule I’ll invite people to do things and give them time to invite me to do things… if they don’t I don’t invite them anymore).
I left this group for about 2 years (I escaped attempted murder… the group knew a little about my problems).
I ran into one of the members and she goes “we worried about you, we tried calling you”. That’s a lie. No one called me. I called the BS “I didn’t get a single call from anyone”… I think she was shocked.
They didn’t call (nor did I call them so fair game)… I accepted that BUT lying about it is BS. I’ll say “yes, I never called you”…. but they will lie to feel better.
I so hate liars, am I alone?
I was at the store today (a small dog friendly place). There was a line of people behind me while I was checking out. I could feel people staring at my back. I wanted to get out of there.
When I was done I turned around and had to walk past these people to leave. My dog was healing (extremely well behaved). Some little kid asked to pet my dog and I said “no not now”.
I felt rude but I’ve learned in life I’ve spent too much time doing things for others that make me uncomfortable. I just wanted to get out of there.
I can be more comfortable with a small group of people I know (that aren’t evil)… but some situations are hell for me. I also have PTSD from an abusive relationship (not sure if that’s related).
Also do some people wear headphones just so people don’t talk to them? I feel like I can’t be distracted to function at my highest capacity.
Online dating (multiple conversations with multiple males):
Me: are those your children in that photo
Them: it’s a cute photo isn’t it
Me: it sounds like you’re a busy person, like on average how many hours a week
Them: I keep busy
Me: that sounds great, I’m free at 6pm. would you like to meet then
Them: it should be a great day for a walk
Me: so are you interested in a long term relationship or a short term relationship
Them: I’m looking for someone to connect with
Me: sorry to hear about that, so you are divorced right
Them: it was a painful struggle
DO YOU JUST BLOCK THESE PEOPLE THAT CANT ANSWER QUESTIONS DIRECTLY OR DO YOU ASK THEM AGAIN? I feel like no one answers questions anymore… it’s all gray. How do people operate like this.
EDIT: these are examples of multiple conversations with multiple males… it’s not one single male
So I hear that sometimes people with autism don’t understand social cues or behaviors.
Maybe I’m understanding this wrong but I think I understand what the world/society expects from me.
Like at work I’m suppose to be fake, kiss the leaders butts, act busy if I’m not… dating I’m suppose to be impressed my people careers or wealth and feed the fragile male ego… neighbors I’m suppose to say hi to them even if they know I know that they allow their dogs to poop in my yard….
It’s like I know what is expected, I just refuse to play the game.
I do, when I’m in public it feels like I’m a NPC, or in a movie and I’m the only one without a script.
NPC (non-player character) is any video game or tabletop character not controlled by a player, acting as a supporting element with pre-programmed behaviors, such as shopkeepers, quest-givers, or background character… acting as props to enhance the protagonist's experience