u/aliveonly

Hi everyone, looking for some objective feedback on our current nanny situation to see if we’re overreacting or if these are clear signs we should move on.

Our nanny started a late last year in November. When we hired her, she highlighted extensive experience with early childhood development, structured activities, and major developmental milestones (potty training, transitioning off pacifier, teaching art/skills, etc.). We live in New York City and pay her a premium rate well above the local average, along with a very generous benefits package.

We also felt an initial sense of ease because we are an LGBTQ+ family and our nanny is also part of the LGBTQ+ community and our age. We hoped this shared background would make communication easy and comfortable. However, in hindsight, I worry this shared affinity made the dynamic a bit too casual from the start and made her more likely to take advantage of things.

Even during the hiring process, communication was lagging, it would often take days to hear back from her via email. Overall, she positions herself as an authority on childhood development, but in practice, we aren't really seeing much of her influence or impact.

The Issues:

1. Punctuality: For the first few months, she was late every morning (5–10 minutes, occasionally up to 30 minutes). Because I work from home with a flexible schedule and we only use part-time care, I felt like our flexibility was being taken advantage of. Hand-offs take a while in the morning because I WFH and want my toddler to feel secure before I step away, so lateness throws off the morning routine. Even now, I am generally pretty much always worried whether she will be on time.
2. Value vs. Engagement: Things stabilized a bit, but my partner is increasingly feeling like we are overpaying for the level of engagement. Rather than introducing new developmental activities or milestone support, their days are fairly repetitive (walks, parks, picnics). For instance, we’ve wanted to transition away from bottles, but she hasn't taken much initiative or provided helpful support in driving that transition. Are we expecting too much here?
3. Communication & Call-Outs: Today was her third time calling in sick. What made it particularly frustrating was that she emailed us just 30 minutes before her start time. She just called in sick two weeks ago, so it feels unlikely that she's genuinely sick again so soon. Additionally, our child had a slight fever last week (we suspect from teething, as there were no other symptoms), which makes the timing of her call-out feel questionable to us. Also we used to get more regular updates/pics, but not at all now.
   My partner feels these are mounting signs of unreliability and a lack of professionalism, and that we're being taken advantage of given the high rate we pay. I agree with his concerns, but I also want to make sure we aren't overreacting or misjudging the situation.

Are we expecting too much? How would you handle this? Is it time to set strict boundaries/performance expectations, or would you start looking for a replacement? We pride ourselves on trying to be really accommodating.

Hi all,

Feel like my Oura ring records temperatures at random times of the day or when I manually open the NC app. I used to use the NC thermometer (I sucked at staying consistent) and remember you’re supposed to take your temp right when you wake up. Does the Oura ring do that as well?? I feel like my temp readings aren’t as accurate.

Any insights on this TV? My living room is extremely bright with full wall to ceiling windows on the walls directly across from (running parallel) and perpendicular to screen making our previous tv unusable during the day. I think we are almost set on this TV because I have a significant discount through a friend.

We’re also considering HiSense UR9. Both 75”. I’d poked around some subs and seen that the Sony Bravia 7 ii is also comparable. Any insights would be helpful!! Thanks in advance.

Hi!

Hoping that anyone might be able to share their experience with the Bugaboo Butterfly 2? Or possibly recommend any other travel stroller you love.

We’ve had a crazy summer of travel already and have a few more flights left this summer. We already have the Nuna Triv Next, which we like since we live in a major city and don’t have a ton of space to store an every day stroller. I kind of wish we would’ve gotten a bigger full size stroller with larger wheels given how much mileage we put on it but that’s another story.

Does anyone have the Bugaboo Butterfly 2? We’d primary need to stow overhead on flights and rental cars, so looking for something compact. We have been traveling with our Triv but it’s been getting banged up in stowage and I’ll be damned if that stroller breaks. I can’t help but feel like the two strollers are similar in specs, so not sure what to do.

I am drawn to this brand because I really like their larger models and think I’d buy one of those if we were to have another little one. Also open to other recs!