u/artemis17121985

I had an Occupational Health/capability meeting with work yesterday (I’m a UPS1 primary school teacher) regarding my ME/CFS (fluctuates between mild and moderate, started with myocarditis in 2020 possibly caused by covid)
The meeting actually went much better than I expected. They acknowledged how much I’d been carrying over the last few years as well as the ME diagnosis (bereavements, fertility issues, miscarriages, hypothyroidism and endometriosis, my husband and stepchildren are neurodiverse and their own challenges, managing PTSD from an abusive relationship I left 11 years ago) discussed the possibility of a non-classroom-based role rather than pushing me straight back into teaching full-time.
What surprised me afterwards was a conversation with my mum.
I was talking about being nervous about using mobility aids at work and being visibly disabled. Her immediate response wasn’t about the aids or the ME/CFS. It was about my weight.
She said she knows it’s because of my thyroid issues, ME/CFS, medications, inability to exercise etc., but that “other people can be judgemental.”
It really threw me because I wasn’t thinking about my weight at all until she mentioned it.
The thing is, this isn’t new. She’s always been very focused on weight, food, and body size. When I was younger she’d comment if I gained weight, what I was eating, snacking on cheese, salt intake, and so on. She does the same with my dad.
Since becoming ill I’ve gone from being someone who climbed, swam, strength trained and walked miles every day to someone managing ME/CFS, hypothyroidism, chronic pain and mobility issues. My body has changed. Of course it has.
What I’m struggling with is that I feel like I’m grieving disability, loss of function and loss of independence, while some people around me seem to focus on my appearance.
Has anyone else experienced this?
Did family members fixate on your weight or appearance when the bigger issue was actually chronic illness and disability? How did you deal with it? (That goes for the other way as well, those of you who have lost a lot of weight and have muscle wastage)

Hello I’m newly diagnosed (last week) and I have developed sensory issues. Multiple sounds all going on at once really hurt me, loud noise. I also get buzzy, full ears.
Has anyone used Loops to help them (my neuro diverse friends use them) and which model would you recommend?