u/babygirl_He

I fucking I hate this world. I feel like there is a big deep hole in my heart.

I read many novels, but I'm still too sensitive and I hate it 😭 So I was reading Wine and Gun 92th chapter, and Herstal gave up and said that he lost and fell in love...

He gently kissed Al (bruh he was so shocked...) 😭

That ex pedophile priest makes me sick....

Herstal took Al's blood to make it look like he killed him.. He already planned everything.. Fuckk I'm scared

What do you think about it?? Pls no spoilers🙏🏻🙏🏻

Recently I started to read Wine and Gun (plot takes place in USA, but author is Chinese). So first of all it's very interesthing, but fandom is very small, and the second I feel so smart when I'm reading it lol

I'd like people to tell me their opinion about this novel. How is it?

I just watched Lost and Found (1996, Hong Kong) and on the scene where Worm and Lam were singing karaoke or something they sang such a wonderful song (about heaven) so I tried to Shazam it. It didn't work, but I'm searching for the name. Please help🙏🏻

(maybe spoiler?)

Ahahahha I'm on 80th chapter of Kaleidoscope of death and it's Lin Qiushi's first door without Ruan Nanzhu. Qiushi's client supposed to be a high school girl, but suddenly he sees not a cute girl, but 180+ height masculine man with huge tits which is wearing crop top and super mini skirt. It's too small that poor Qiushi's able to see his dih😭 hahaha it's so funny.

P. S I'm waiting for Nanzhu's reaction (will he be jealous??)

Recently I shared a post about my childhood memory. I was suspecting that it was SA, but I wasn't sure so I asked people on reddit. Someone answered that it was definitely SA but... Idk maybe I'm just overthinking (again) but I feel like my problem isn't big as yours.

Yk it's just feels strange to me.... What should I do?

Was it SA?

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To be honest, I really don't want to talk about it, and I feel really disgusted. I feel sick of myself and often find myself hating myself. The thing is, I've been "doing this" to myself from time to time since I was 6 or 7 (I don't remember the exact age). I do it about once a week or every two weeks. Over time, as I grew up, I realized how inappropriate and wrong this behavior is. I never talked about it to anyone because I'm a lowkey an introvert and generally don't want to talk about such things. Lately, I've been thinking about this for a long time and remembered something from childhood. I remembered how I used to play spin the bottle with my sister and cousins ​​(my oldest brother would tell us different things and we would do them), and suddenly I realized that the things he asked us to do were pretty strange, like "lick each other down there," "kiss," and so on. He didn't force me to do it, but he forced my brother and sister, and they had fun. Overall, no one took it seriously; it was just a game for them (I was the youngest one). One day, my brother told us to touch his penis, including me. I don't remember if I was against it; apparently, when I was little, it seemed normal to me because my brother and sister laughed and touched it. It looked like mastrubating gestures. We all played, and then forgot about it. I think we never talked about this "game" in the presence of adults, etc. After that, I started searching for very disturbing and strange things like "naked people," "naked people at sea orgies," and then it all dawned on me that I started watching porn at age 7, and then lesbian sex (I'm straight). As a child, when I first started masturbating, I found it terribly pleasurable, and it happened almost daily. I became very hypersexual. As a child, I often had nightmares and often felt uncomfortable. I'm afraid of people and try to avoid crowded and loud places. I'm embarrassed to think about 18+ things in front of others because I think they'll read my mind. I'm somehow controlling it now, but I want to stop masturbating completely. I'm ashamed and disgusted. I don't like it, but this childhood habit won't go away. Me and my cousin talking very normal now and no one even remembers it (ig). Everyone just acts like nothing ever happened. I think (and I'm almost sure) that I have some mental issues and sometimes İ think that may be nothing even happened and I just Imagined everything :/ but I think that it's unlikely.

​

Anyway, was I SA?...

Recently I started to read Kaleidoscope of death and it's freaking interesting! But there's one thing. Unfortunatly I saw a spoiler. It said that Ruang Nanzhu is a 12nd door.... And soo umhhh. Does it mean that he's not a human? Please explain...

To be honest, I really don't want to talk about it, and I feel really disgusted. I feel sick of myself and often find myself hating myself. The thing is, I've been "doing this" to myself from time to time since I was 6 or 7 (I don't remember the exact age). I do it about once a week or every two weeks. Over time, as I grew up, I realized how inappropriate and wrong this behavior is. I never talked about it to anyone because I'm a lowkey an introvert and generally don't want to talk about such things. Lately, I've been thinking about this for a long time and remembered something from childhood. I remembered how I used to play spin the bottle with my sister and cousins ​​(my oldest brother would tell us different things and we would do them), and suddenly I realized that the things he asked us to do were pretty strange, like "lick each other down there," "kiss," and so on. He didn't force me to do it, but he forced my brother and sister, and they had fun. Overall, no one took it seriously; it was just a game for them (I was the youngest one). One day, my brother told us to touch his penis, including me. I don't remember if I was against it; apparently, when I was little, it seemed normal to me because my brother and sister laughed and touched it. It looked like mastrubating gestures. We all played, and then forgot about it. I think we never talked about this "game" in the presence of adults, etc. After that, I started searching for very disturbing and strange things like "naked people," "naked people at sea orgies," and then it all dawned on me that I started watching porn at age 7, and then lesbian sex (I'm straight). As a child, when I first started masturbating, I found it terribly pleasurable, and it happened almost daily. I became very hypersexual. As a child, I often had nightmares and often felt uncomfortable. I'm afraid of people and try to avoid crowded and loud places. I'm embarrassed to think about 18+ things in front of others because I think they'll read my mind. I'm somehow controlling it now, but I want to stop masturbating completely. I'm ashamed and disgusted. I don't like it, but this childhood habit won't go away. Me and my cousin talking very normal now and no one even remembers it (ig). Everyone just acts like nothing ever happened. I think (and I'm almost sure) that I have some mental issues and sometimes İ think that may be nothing even happened and I just Imagined everything :/ but I think that it's unlikely.

Anyway, was I SA?...