u/birdieponderinglife

He had a huge settlement coming. Why did he risk it by doing a serious crime? I don’t understand how he got exonerated which is rare but wound up throwing his life away anyways. It doesn’t make any sense to me. I guess I’m missing the common thread. He wasn’t a good person but from what we know, wasn’t a murderer. So what happened? Is this just always who he was going to be and had he never gone to prison wrongfully maybe it would have happened sooner? I don’t think he’s innocent I’m just trying to make sense of it.

My dog is a nearly 7 y/o French bulldog. He’s got allergies, a history with a probable severe IBD episode, he’s had BOAS surgery and he’s been neutered.

Last year he went in for a cleaning and removal of a cracked tooth under anesthesia and they found significant issues with many teeth. I ended up having 4 extracted and the plan was to do another procedure after he healed to get another batch of teeth before coming back for his yearly cleaning and doing another round of extractions for the remaining ones that weren’t urgent. I asked her to take a close look at his airway while he was under just to confirm that for a frenchie he was as optimized as possible. She said his airway looked great, and was one of the best she’s seen in her patients so I feel ok about the extra rounds of anesthesia for dental work from an airway perspective.

Within a week of the procedure he developed cervical ivdd. I do not think anyone was negligent or overly rough with him. I do think that his breed, the lack of muscle tone to protect his spine while under anesthesia, the neck positioning required for intubation and the manipulation of his head and jaw for cleaning and extractions definitely did contribute if not outright cause the ivdd. But I see this as a complication and don’t have any concerns about his vet team because of it.

I never took him back for that inbetween procedure to have the teeth extracted as ivdd recovery is a long process and at this point he’s thankfully fully recovered. I know he needs to go back and get his teeth taken care of though. I don’t want him to be in pain and they feel like a ticking time bomb in his mouth.

I asked the vet about it and they agreed it was a risk for him but there wasn’t much of a way around it. They said they’d do their best to minimally manipulate his neck but I know some of it there won’t be any work arounds or avoiding it. I do trust they will do their best with him I’m just really scared and worried getting his teeth cleaned could wind up leading to the end of his life or suffering through another round of severe intense pain from ivdd. It was so miserable to watch him be in pain like that.

They suggested a referral to a specialty center and evaluation by a neurology team for a cleaning and extraction. I have insurance for him but dental is not covered so all of it would likely be oop expenses and I’m already struggling to cover the costs of the cleanings and extractions. With all of them in one round it would have been about $4000. I think he needed 9 teeth removed and down the road he’ll probably need more. I’ve never had a dog that required such extensive dental work so this caught me by surprise. The vet said this is common for the breed due to their short snout which causes all kinds of crowding and mayhem with their teeth.

My plan due to the risks associated with his neck is to wait for his next yearly cleaning and have the rest of the needed extractions done then. Anything that can wait will need to for financial reasons. After that I need a plan for managing his teeth that won’t paralyze him. Letting them fall out of his head with no intervention doesn’t interest me but I don’t know what the balance is for this.

I love him so much and now that I know how awful these dogs are bred I will never get another or encourage anyone to get one. That said, he’s here and he deserves the best life possible and I want to give him that. What should I do? Is there anything else I should consider?

I’ve been searching pretty much every William Wylie I can find in the Ontario census records from 1871 and I’ve mostly come up with no one that seems to match my G0’s parents names. Today I found an entry for a William and Agnes where the ages lined up, mostly. He was listed as age 22 but if his marriage age was correct he would have been 24ish. Hers was correct— 18. They were living 6 hrs (today’s roads) away from where the rest of their family was, which is odd. The entry also had a baby, 9mos old. Listed as being born in July. I think that means the census was in April and the birth year would be 1870. Her name was Amma Wylie but it’s the only listing I see for her anywhere. If these are my G0’s parents then he was born in December 1871 so entirely possible his mom was pregnant at the time of the census.

Could her name have been Emma instead? She never appears in any subsequent documents so that makes me wonder if it was them then did she pass away? I’ve never heard the name Amma so I looked it up and it’s a Nordic name or a word that means grandma or born on Saturday. No one has attached this record to any family trees. Any ideas as to what this could mean? If it’s their census entry this would be a useful supporting document and perhaps help point me to find my G0’s birth or baptism record if he was born in another part of Ontario.

Edit: I found a death record for a farmer in Huron named William Wylie for 1876. The ages line up so if that’s him on the death certificate then it’s probably them on this census. >!Suicide by poison.!< Wasn’t expecting that. Would the death certificate list family or next of kin? There a record number but the database seemed to be down.

I’m not finding much.

What I have:

A name: Thomas Henry Wylie

A location: Hawkesbury Ontario

Birthdate: Dec 1871

US Naturalization documents:
-petition from 1881 upon arrival to US with mom and stepdad
-naturalization in 1915 with 2nd wife’s (my gg grandma) family as witnesses

Supporting documents:
-death certificate for first wife listing Thos H. Wiley as the spouse
- marriage doc for his second marriage to Josephine
-us census docs from 1900 onwards that record he’s from Canada and arrived in 1881
-obituary from 1919 when he died

Parents names: William Wylie and Mary Agnes Smith(?)

His aliases: Thomas Wiley, Thomas H Wiley, Thos Wiley

He lived the rest of his life in Wisconsin near eau claire.

His kids and wives names: I have all of these but not handy atm (ask if needed). His 2nd wife was Josephine Pearl Elliott and their son Thomas Elliott Wiley was my g-grandfather (G1). It seems he sometimes went by Elliott Wiley and was recorded in some census docs this way. I think that’s pretty common for father and son with the same first name. He was married a couple of times as well. His first wife Margaret is my g-gma. Their daughter Kathleen is my GMA (G2).

What I don’t have:
Any record of G0 or his parents existing in Canada— no census records for them, no marriage records for his parents, no baptism record, no death record for his dad, nothing.

I’ve searched ancestry and family search pretty thoroughly for him and his parents. I tried some of the official databases for Ontario but I’m still figuring out how to use them. Seems like there’s a bit of a learning curve to this and I’m not getting anywhere.

Any help would be very much appreciated!

I’m in Seattle. Seattle has specific allowances for breaking a lease without penalty. One of them is repairs not being done in a timely manner. For major stuff like a water leak or heating issue it’s 24 hrs. For urgent stuff it’s 72hours and for everything else it’s 10 days. I moved in 4/5/25 and just renewed my lease for another year. I can’t go month to month.

I’ve dealt with a few things that I would consider harassment and interference with me enjoying this place such as:

* refusing to return a pet deposit that was never enforceable,

* playing games about sending the money like saying they were going to tack on an extra amount to the remaining pet deposit and not return a portion in order to keep the maximum (not adhering to the lease terms),

* sending the money as credits instead of giving the money back (this way they wouldn’t have to return as much because they were also trying to increase my deposit and last months rent which is also against renting code) and then finally,

* pretending that they sent the check and claiming it was cashed fraudulently. They said they would need to open a fraud investigation so I’d need to wait for that before they could send another. Once I asked for proof like a copy of the deposited check they said it was all a mistake and the money had been mistakenly sent back to their bank.

* They also tried to take an increase on my deposit and my last months rent at renewal even though that’s unenforceable.

This is a property mgmt company that has been in business a long while, representing many properties so claiming ignorance of the laws is not a reasonable defense.

My PM is quite rude to me when I reach out now and was over the course of me inquiring about the pet deposit and additional last months rent and deposit top off at renewal, to the point that the other folks have often stepped in and responded.

I’ve had repeated issues with the heat where the heaters and thermostats repeatedly break. There is one in each room. They only responded to my maintenance requests about the heater once in the proper time frame.

Now, the fridge/freezer. The day I moved in the freezer had full on icicles on the ceiling of it but I just thought it was from being empty for so long. In November of 2025 I decided that no, my food almost instantly becoming frostbitten and constant ice formations were not normal at all so I made a maintenance request. They never responded to it and after about a month or so I went to take a look and they had just straight up closed it. I reopened a request and stated in it that they had closed my last one without fixing anything and asked them to send someone out to take a look. The seal was leaking. I could feel cold air. I don’t know the response time on that but they said a seal needed to be ordered. They asked me to measure. I did. The seal arrived, the guy brought it out and it didn’t fit. They put the old one back on and for a short amount of time it seemed to be not leaking and ice wasn’t building up.

Then it started again but because I said the seal seemed to be working I just assumed the previous request was closed so I opened a new one. My rude PM immediately reached out and chewed me out about making another request when one was open still. Then she made up a bunch of stuff about me never being available for the repair guy to come put the seal on so this was an issue because of me (?!). I responded against that because it felt like she was trying to make me out to be an unreliable tenant when in fact, the new seal had already been tried. The guy took a picture of the size difference and said he was going to send them a picture that it didn’t fit so I have no clue what she’s even talking about.

So they ordered another seal. This time the guy came and measured for it. I didn’t want to be responsible for it being wrong and giving them ammunition. It still didn’t fit but he kinda like poked it in and was like “let’s give it a try.” After a day it was evident that it was even worse than the old one. I sent a message to them to let them know but there hasn’t been any response. Meanwhile, my freezer looks like there was a blizzard in there and I can see where the ice formations have melted some so I’m not even sure my frozen foods are safe to eat at this point. The thermometer I have in the freezer recorded temps up to about 23 degrees. It’s been far longer than 72 hrs at this point.

I’m so sick of them and their games and dealing with this freezer that has never worked right. If I leave without grounds to break the lease I’m responsible for rent until they are able to rent it plus some ridiculous relisting fee of about $2200. Given I have about 9 months left on this lease I can’t afford to take that gamble and have no faith they will get a tenant in with any urgency. But at the end of the day I wouldn’t want to leave at all if they were just not being shady and terrible to me. A working freezer should not take 7+ months to accomplish.

What are my rights? Do I have grounds to break this lease legally?

I’ve been trying to get this seal fixed since November. The PM sent their repair guy on Monday to replace the seal. It is visibly thinner than the old one and there was a large gap on the bottom where cold air was obviously escaping. He was aware of this. My freezer is filling with ice by the minute it seems. I’ve been keeping a thermometer in there and it registered a high of 23 degrees. There is now ice on the outside of the seal as of this morning.

I sent a message telling them the seal was not working. The repair guy left the old seal here just in case. I’m thinking their next move is to tell me to put the old seal back on. It leaked less so it would be an improvement but is it unreasonable that I don’t want to be responsible for this? It doesn’t require any tools. The issue is that they are absolute d-bags who will definitely be attempting to charge me for every last thing in this place when I move out (I always get my full deposit back I’m a good tenant) so the last thing I want to do is assume any responsibility for work done to their appliance.

Is this a fair play? It looks like I could pull the seal out and put the other one back by pushing it into the channel. But what if it rips or I put it on wrong or they are just a-holes who invent something saying I caused damage to the fridge? If they weren’t the way that they are then I would do it but for them, not so sure. Thoughts?

I’ve got a remote job with no possibility of being returned to office (there’s no office, there never was) and when my lease is up I’ve been thinking of doing some wandering. I need to stick to the United States as international will get me fired. We have company policies about how much time you can spend away from home and I believe it’s three months in the span of a year.

My thinking is choose a short term rental somewhere and stay for about a month. Then come back to where my home address (friends place) is for a little bit and leave again. Or, I could stay gone the whole three months and visit various places, then come back, rent somewhere in the same city for awhile then leave again. The three months resets at the end of the year and they have policies around combining it so I’d be back in this area for a period of time then I could leave again. I can probably fudge on the amount of time slightly.

I’m planning to work during this time but I can still take vacations with my PTO. To do this I need a stable place to stay with good WiFi and I’m thinking about room rentals or sublets rather than airbnbs.

Has anyone traveled like this before? Is there a factor I’m not considering? It seems like as long as I can maintain an address locally then I don’t think they will question this at all.

I’m in gatewood so I’ve been considering Safeway or QFC. Wondering if anyone has feedback on one over the other. I’m currently at Nguyen on rainier because I used to live closer and I prefer supporting independent pharmacies when possible.

I take adderall so whichever one tends to have 5mg XR in stock the most is what I’m looking for. Nguyen flat out told me they won’t fill it anymore. It’s not because it’s out of stock. They lose money on it so they refuse to fill it.

I’ve had ongoing service requests to repair my freezer as the door seal is leaking. The repair request was initially created last November. They quietly closed the request without notifying me and when I noticed I reopened one and stated it was closed without my knowledge and no repair was made. In March they asked me to measure the seal so a third party replacement could be ordered. No further guidance about exactly what parts needed the measurements. I measured the seal as requested and sent them images of it so they could see where I took the measurements and calculate the measurement from the pictures on their own because I felt unsure about what was needed.

Replacement arrived and it’s the wrong size. The maintenance guy took some pictures to send them as an update then put the old one back on. For a short period of time it seemed to stop building up ice in the freezer. I responded to the maintenance guy via text with this update and assumed he would manage any updates to the service request and update the PM.

After about 6 weeks the ice has begun building up significantly. I can feel cold air escaping from the corner of the freezer. I opened a new request for this and the PM made a hostile response to me claiming they’ve had a seal available but I’ve been uncooperative about allowing the maintenance guy access to install it, which is completely false. She was also angry that I opened a new request since there was already an open one. I mean, I guess that’s on me for not checking but there was also no communication about their plan for the request and they have a history of being quick and inappropriate about closing so I just assumed they closed it.

Another PM messaged me in the request with a diagram of the door and asked for precise measurements to 1/16” for the replacement seal. I told him I thought it would be best if their maintenance guy took the measurements. His response was to mock me and act like this was an unreasonable request.

Y’all, this freezer has not worked properly since I moved in over a year ago. I’ve been waiting 6 months for a resolution. I feel like some frustration on my end is warranted but I’ve done my best to respond professionally despite the way they respond to me. Is it unreasonable that I do not want to accept the responsibility of taking precise measurements for this part? I already did once and got it wrong so I’m not feeling confident. And they are so hostile towards me I don’t feel like if I were to get it wrong they would be ok accepting the cost for the seal based on my measurements a second time.

I just want my food to be safe from thawing and getting frost bitten.

My frenchie has a deep tail pocket on one side and it’s looking red and irritated. I put some topical antimicrobial stuff on there but I’m wondering if putting a piece of gauze in there so the skin isn’t touching might help. Has anyone done this? I don’t want to tightly pack it just slide the gauze in like a barrier. I would change it daily/as needed. It’s just a little irritated and if it gets worse rest assured I will take him to the vet.

Are there good secondhand resources I can check out for my initial tool outlay?

Also, buying leather. I want to get some cheap stuff just to practice. What type should I get? Seems like the belly pieces are cheapest but also thin and stretchy. Are there places I can buy scraps?

My goal is to make chest harnesses but maybe I start with making other strappy things that don’t require so many body measurements?

To make harnesses what sort of tools will I need?

Any other advice or resources I should check out?

Thank you!