u/certainclown

There is NOTHING you can do about being 6'2. And when you're this extremely tall, it's very, very common, even as a feminine cis woman, to be accused of being trans. Anyone claiming otherwise has no idea what they're talking about. Go on r/TallGirls and read some of the posts there. Many there consider themselves tall when they're 5'7. But I'm 6'2. 6'2!!!!!!!

I can't get rid of my gender dysphoria without stealth passing. I can't. But I can't stealth pass due to being 6'2. So what do I even do? I can't do anything but suffer, literally just because I BADLY lost the genetic lottery for transitioning.

It's really great that you're not depressed, that you stopped being depressed. It's good that you have a partner, loved ones, you're doing well financially.

But I'm not happy for you. Not even a little bit. Seeing people do well in life compared to me only makes me jealous and angry that it's not me, but someone else who is doing fine. I legitimately can't be happy for someone else.

I know this is a bad mindset. Maybe I should change it. But I feel like then I'll just be weak and pathetic that I allow others to be happier than me.

In my eyes, if you're actually feminine or at least not very masculine, if you're short you automatically have nothing to complain about. Even if your face was very masculine (it likely isn't), you can get FFS. You can't get anything for height at all. You can't do anything. I'm always much, much taller than women and almost always taller than men. You can't do anything even in principle. It's possible that in the future, you'll be able to make your ribcage smaller, your shoulders more narrow. But to be shorter, you'd have to literally shrink your skull, also your brain, which is just impossible.

The fact is that tall MTFs are more, not less, likely to be more masculine. Even apart from the obvious fact that being tall = masculine, if you're tall, you had low estrogen levels during puberty. Testosterone doesn't solidify growth plates, but estrogen does. That's one of the reasons why women tend to be shorter. Also, if you're tall in general, you had high HGH (human growth hormone), which tends to make you look more ogre-ish in general. Big, masculine jaw, long midface, etc.

I feel like I'm living in literal hell. Not only am I very masculine in general (I have NEVER malefailed even after nearly 3 years of HRT), but I'm tall and you can't fix that ever. EVER. Do you know what that feels like? Repressing/manmoding to you might be a LARP that's fun to do as a mentally ill or sociopathic passoid, but for some people it's actually permanent. I have a few specific people in mind here too. QUIT LARPING. You're not a manmoder. You're not actually masculine. If you're repressing and you actually look feminine, cut the LARP bullshit and just transition or at least HRT rep.

I feel like I can only take FTMs seriously hrere, because if you see an FTM here, they will always be logical and rational, not manipulating people with dumb LARPs and instead complaining about actual, real problems (like being 4'11).

I'm stuck like this FOREVER. I am literally a subhuman, ogre-looking high HGH low estrogen (during puberty) man. Transition is physically impossible for me. Losing weight and being more skinny did much more for me than HRT. Losing some fat (but zero muscle apparently! lol!) made me feel smaller and overall less like a monster. My goal is to get to the lowest BMI I can possibly get to. I don't care if it's unhealthy.

I'm sorry to invade your space, but I don't really know where else to ask.

Summer is coming, so I decided to buy a new binder since my old ones don't look so great.

So, I'm a manmoder (if you don't know what that means, Google it) and after some time on HRT wearing a binder became necessary. All of the binders I've bought (from several different companies) haven't really worked well for binding. I recently bought a new one and the size was even very slightly too small but it binds pretty poorly. For one, the binder doesn't really seem to hold my breast tissue in place very well and the way it compresses it makes it have a sort of big disk shape, if that makes sense. Given the nature of binders, because this doesn't (for me) give a flat or nearly flat chest and both sides are connected by a sort of bridge, meaning that my breast tissue, if noticed, doesn't look like normal gynecomastia, but like I'm wearing a poorly made bra or something similar.

Getting a flat chest is absolutely necessary for me, because I absolutely cannot pass as female (I'm 6'2, I have a masculine body and face) and I'd like to not have any issues with people. My breast tissue is large enough to be very noticeable though not 'large' in general, but that's irrelevant. Binding with only a t-shirt on seems completely impossible, as well as with a sweater or hoodie. Some people say that you can hide your breasts through layering, but that never works at all for me. Sports bras obviously don't either, because they're not even meant to hide your breasts. Plus, they give a very obvious outline of a bra worn under clothing which is completely unacceptable for me.

The only thing that seems to work is wearing a binder, then on top some kind of oversized thick jacket. Anything else gives away my chest instantly, especially if using something useless like a hoodie (all it takes is a gust of wind against your chest). This isn't much of a problem in winter, fall or spring, but in summer it is.

Again, I'm sorry to invade your space, as I know it isn't meant for me. Ideally, I would never manmode and never bind, but the alternative was to repress and never get HRT, so I'm just doing what I can do. I haven't noticed any damage to my breast tissue (which, due to how deformed it is and how masculine I am, I don't feel like calling breasts) or my ribcage. Mostly binding is just annoying and uncomfortable.