r/TransRepressors

After my long period of questioning, I can finally accept that I am not a trans woman. However the mere acceptance doesn't solve the issues I had been attributing to my "transness". I still hate hairloss, and I hate that I am still losing hair on meds. My libido is fked, and I either feel asexual or jerk off 2 times a day. I am depressed and anxious often, with a touch of OCD too.

Hairloss meds I've been using do come with possible chance to cause all these mental side effects. Since I am still losing hair and am not a trans woman, I wonder would if it not be better to just stop using these meds? On one hand I'll go bald at 21 and struggle with all the issues coming with that, on the other hand there's a chance I'll get cured of these side effects and end up doing much better than now.

Ngl a huge part of why the idea of being trans appealed to me was cuz I believed estrogen would stop my balding, and fix my mental issues too. But maybe the truth is I need to accept my maleness fully, baldness and all.

Why are you repping? Is repping temporary or a permanent thing for you? What made you decide to repress?

How do I stop? I know I’m faking I just know it. There’s no way someone just develops GD at 21. It‘s clearly just a lifestyle choice for me motivated by AGP and trauma. What do I do?

\*\*Note:\*\* This post was translated from Japanese into English using a translation tool.

About a week ago, on a whim, I conducted a Button Test poll in a Japanese-language casual discussion community on Reddit, restricting participation to people who identify as cisgender and heterosexual.

https://www.reddit.com/r/lowlevelaware/s/o3VJnnSVek

The results showed that roughly half of both men and women voted that they would press the button.

Of course, some people may have voted out of mere curiosity, and my wording may have been flawed. Even so, isn't that an unusually high proportion?

Also, four days ago, a Japanese-language post went viral on X. It described a certain type of socially disadvantaged man who, when thinking about the kind of girl he likes, feels not that he "wanted to date her," but that he "wanted to be her."

https://x.com/yunisub25/status/2106884558251839726?s=46

There were many replies and quote posts expressing agreement with this sentiment. However, from what I could tell, very few of those people identified as transgender.

These examples make me wonder: Is the desire to change one's sex actually much more universal than we tend to think?

In Japan, there is a strong stereotype that MtFs are people who are attracted to men, have had feminine interests and mannerisms since childhood, and experienced clear social and physical gender dysphoria before puberty. This raises the possibility that there are many people in Japan who are unconscious repressors and have yet to recognize their own desires.

If they really are unconscious repressors, I'm incredibly envious of them.

I could have been like them, too. But by chance, I came across Blanchard's typology online and came to recognize that I was MtF myself. Is there any way to return to the state I was in before I became aware of it?

I’m done trying to cope.

I’d rather live in ignorance imagining what could have been as opposed to facing the harsh reality of what will never be.

Hrt makes physical dysphoria 10x worse. At least this way I have a greater chance at not becoming a 41. Transition is delusional.

Edit: Transition is delusional for me. * Some can make it.

I will probably repress till i ctb.
I am 5’2, mostly attracted to men, 21.
It is already too late for start. And i know transition not gonna give me my ideal-dreamed self, i still stuck in this sex, body, existence and their limitations. I watch some right wing how elliot page ruined his life videos, they dont lie. I dont want to exist as a quasimodo, i dont have a fixable body with gym, diet, i dont have a traditionally attractive face for both gender. I suppose I don’t even need to say just how much cis gay men hate gay trans men. But i know i cant stay like that, already as a repressor female my life is shitty, so i know it just gonna end up soon. So yeah, i just born all wrong. Living, existing like this just a fuckin torture

I'm talking about naming yourself on what name you would want if you were the opposite sex, Or did you have a phase where you were so deluded that you could transition that you picked a name for yourself?

I work on a call center, despite this I have completely disasociated from my own voice. My worksona being a woman is perfectly fine. I get "ma'am" all the time, but it's ok because that's not me.

I entered one of those tiktok live things to make a joke and completely forgot what I sound like. Reading the chat refering to me as a girl and saying I "sounded like a child" absolutely destroyed my self esteem rn.

I'm 20 years old this shit isn't cute anymore somebody end me. Why can't I be a man I can't do anything I just sound like a little girl oh my fucking god kill me. Please.

Anyone watch the movie obssesion? I can't stop thinking about the scene where nikki wakes up and starts screaming "it's not me". I really feel like sometimes I just "wake up" and realize this is not me. Nobody knows me. I am not me.

This is a weekly thread for people to discuss how their week has gone so far, socially and emotionally.

Users are expected to share updates in their lives, relating to the mundane to the significant.