u/daystar-daydreamer

The way her hips were swaying all sensually as she walked away with It4mi makes me want to scream. She turned 13 the day that video was posted, so she was TWELVE throughout the whole storyboarding and animation process. Yes yes we all know he's a creep and worse but... Jesus this one in particular just really sticks in my craw for no reason at all.

Maybe it's 'cause he roped some poor unsuspecting animator into DRAWING his fantasy for him, which takes more time, effort, and investment than lying still on a bed in a bloody dress.

^(as instructed I made sure to watch on yt where he's demonetized)

This campaign started at level 3 over Discord. I should have taken a firmer stance earlier, but I didn’t because I managed to look past the red flags and thought “no harm, no foul” until it blew up in our faces. I also know next to nothing about mental health and it’s really going to show. The cast is as follows:

• Me (20f), mentally sound and playing Cassius, a 13-year-old eladrin bardlock; a kid by Eladrin standards.
• Watermelon (17-18), who often talked about their mental health struggles in the server’s venting channel and played Wizard the 13-year-old shifter. Shifters reach adulthood at 10.
• Raspberry, who played Rogue
• Papaya, who played Paladin 
• Clementine, who played Cleruid
• And the dungeon master

In this server, every campaign gets its own channel for OOC discussion, and we liked to show off art of our characters. Watermelon gushed over the pictures I sent of Cass (who looks like a doll for backstory reasons).

As flattered as I was, I also found it a little excessive. But maybe Watermelon was just super invested in Cassius; there’s been a couple times where I’d also gotten more invested in a character than their own creator did. 

Besides, I’m not going to tell someone to stop complimenting my character. 

Come the first session, and Wizard immediately glommed onto Cass. They always talked to him first when RP happened and tried to butt into every conversation he had with Paladin, Rogue, or Cleruid, so I stopped initiating RP with Wizard because they more than made up for it themself. 

Rogue loved having a kid around to mentor (re: be a terrible influence on) and Cass, for his part, found him unbearably cool. Raspberry wanted to teach Cass to use thieves’ tools, so he, the dungeon master, and I came up with a mechanic to make that happen. Over the next several sessions, Cass drifted closer to Rogue than any of the others. Clementine and Papaya didn’t seem to mind. Watermelon, on the other hand… One day, Wizard told Cleruid to heal Cass before Rogue, and Watermelon started begging when Clementine pointed out that Rogue was getting walloped in the middle of melee while Cassius was buffing/debuffing from the sidelines and wasn’t getting hit as much. 

Raspberry called a timeout and revealed that he felt Watermelon had been being passive-aggressive towards him through their characters for no discernible reason and even unfriended him (wed all agreed to friend each other for the duration of the campaign), so the dungeon master dragged Watermelon and Raspberry into a private voice call. They came back several minutes later after supposedly having made peace, Cleruid healed Rogue, and Rogue ended the fight rolling death saves anyway. The dungeon master called session and the party would deal with the aftermath next week. 

Come next week, Wizard hugged Cassius like they were trying to get the last of the toothpaste out. There was a back-and-forth with Cass trying to wiggle away and Wizard trying to hang on. Then they tried to kiss him. I had a WTF moment at that, but I’d found this comedic up to this point and assumed it was just escalating the bit, so I laughed along and Cass smacked Wizard, and Watermelon PMed me to ask what that was for. It was such a stupid question that I couldn’t think of how to answer, so I didn’t and promptly forgot about it.

A few sessions later, the party had to get each other’s backstories, and Cass guards his like nuclear launch codes and tried to tell a version that left out everything he didn’t want to talk about, but the party wasn't having it. I said OOC that I wouldn't mind if they cast Zone of Truth or something on him. Right as Cleruid was gearing up to do just that, Paladin pulled Cass aside, got him to cast Zone of Truth on her, and swore up and down that she wouldn’t use a word he said against him. So he opened up. 

In the campaign channels a few days later, Watermelon said they wanted Zone of Truth, and lamented when Clementine pointed out that wizards couldn’t cast that. I said I wanted Life Transference too, but bardlocks can’t have it. Clementine admitted he wanted Prestidigitation. I asked the dungeon master if the party could teach each other spells like Rogue taught Cass to use thieves’ tools. He agreed as long as we didn’t get any more spell slots than RAW allowed and both the character teaching the spell and the one learning it both had IC justification to want to do so. Watermelon suggested that Wizard would do it because they were in love with Cass and I shot it down. 

Then I remembered the kiss and PMed Watermelon about it. 

Me: Hey so that kiss. Were u joking or was it sincere?

Watermelon: Sincere

Me: Well that’s creepy af

Me: Cass is 13, I’m 20, and you’re almost 18. I don’t want to have him get involved in a relationship with Wizard, especially not with our ages.

Watermelon: Wizard is also 13.

Me: That’s an adult for Shifters. Even if u homebrewed Wizard to age at the same rate as Cass, I’d feel weird RPing romance with a 17yo, and a 17yo wanting to RP romance between a pair of 13yos is creepy imo. One of them being an adult makes it worse. 

Me: No more of that, ok?

Watermelon never replied to that, but I figured a message that clear didn’t need follow-up, so I turned my attention back to the call. Next week, once the awkwardness had passed (or so I thought), Watermelon and I (mostly I, because Watermelon just nodded along to whatever I suggested) decided that Cassius would pester his patron every once in a while to get spell scrolls for Wizard in exchange for the lessons, and on Cassius’s end, he’d teach Wizard spells because he needs them to think he’s useful.

One day, Rogue asked to pull Cass aside to talk away from everyone else. Wizard tried to follow. Raspberry said the conversation’s supposed to be private (At least IC), but Wizard insisted on staying because they need to protect Cass. From Rogue? So Raspberry and I grilled Watermelon about why they thought Rogue was bad news, and they couldn’t come up with anything, so they backed off, asked us to forget that happened, and didn’t say a word the rest of the session.

Cass is illiterate and suuuper insecure about it, and Wizard is super bookish. One day, Cleruid asked why Cassius always gave the spell scrolls he got from his patron to Wizard to teach him, instead of learning them himself, then rolled insight, passed, and realized Cass can’t read. Wizard tried to comfort Cass and tell him it’s nothing to be ashamed of. 

Cassius doesn’t take coddling well, so he tried to deflect and insist doesn’t care that he can’t read (liar liar toga on fire). Watermelon wouldn't let it go and brought it up at every bit of downtime. Eventually, I asked Watermelon for Wizard’s passive insight, which was high enough for them to tell that Cassius really, really didn’t want to talk about it and was barely managing to hide red-hot rage behind saccharine politeness. Watermelon didn't ask again. 

The morning after the session, they PMed me. 

Watermelon: hey

Watermelon: I’m feeling really down rn 

Me: Oh no

Watermelon: I can’t stop thinking abt the fight with Cass 

Me: What fight? It was just an insight check

Watermelon: I’m scared I’ll cut

Me: wat

Me: You’re going to cut over the fight or am I misreading?

Watermelon: Yeah that’s right

Me: Over DnD? 

Me: It’s just a game bro. Idk what to tell u except don’t ig 

With that, I snapped my laptop shut and went to do the dishes. In hindsight, I should have told the mods, but I didn’t because I figured that Watermelon must’ve been pulling my leg (A valid reason to go to the mods in and of itself, now that I think about it). Surely there was no goddamn way in the nine hells any sane person would actually go so far as to cut themself over a GAME!

Fast forward several sessions. Mid-week, Watermelon replied to my “I don’t want to RP romance with a 17yo” PM to tell me it was their 18th birthday, which didn’t change my stance at all so I ignored it. Probably shouldn’t have. Cass, Wizard, and Cleruid had traded some spells, including Life Transference. 

During the session, Paladin went down in the middle of a fight, so Cassius cast Life Transference on her. After the fight, Paladin was equal parts proud of Cassius for doing that, horrified that he’d nearly sacrificed himself, furious at him, and at Wizard for teaching him such a self-destructive spell. Wizard was losing their mind over Cassius getting hurt and insisting everything was their fault. Paladin snapped that it was. 

Watermelon, breaking character, squawked and retorted that Wizard was just “yapping” because they were worried about Cass. Papaya said she knew that and OOC she thought the whole situation was dope af, but IC, Paladin does feel that it’s Wizard’s fault for teaching Cass how to cast Life Transference. Watermelon didn’t say a word the rest of the session and left early, saying they were having a bad mental health day. 

A couple sessions later, Cass and his 8 str ended an encounter pinned by an Entangle spell. As soon as the villain went down, Wizard ran to Cassius not to get him free, but to kiss him. I called a timeout to remind them that I’d said no romance because it’s CREEPY. The dungeon master told them off too. Watermelon tried to insist that Wizard was just overwhelmed with emotion. I pointed out that 1) Why is one of those emotions lust? 2) Cassius is a tween and Wizard is an adult by their race’s standards. 3) Even ignoring the hebephillia, kissing someone without asking, especially if they’re tied up, is gross. 4) I’d said no romance because it’s CREEPY. 

Watermelon: But Wizard loves him!

And their voice broke. 

Me: Are you crying? 

Watermelon: Why can’t you just play along? They’re both 13; it’s not that big of a gap, is it? I love him!

Dungeon master: Wizard is an adult and Cassius isn’t, even if they’re the same age. That's a big deal. 

Me: You love him? He’s not real. What’s wrong with you?

Watermelon: He’s real enough to make me cut!

Record scratch. Papaya and the dungeon master started spam-pinging the mods, but it was late and none of them were online.

Me: You cut yourself? 

Watermelon: YES!

Me: Over DnD? It’s just a game. Jesus, Mary, and Joseph – OVER A GODDAMN GAME!? 

In hindsight, I should have been nicer to someone melting down right in front of my eyes. But at the time, all I saw was a big baby who needed a reality check. 

Watermelon: It hurts me when Cass won’t pay attention to them.

Me: You cut yourself over a fictional kid ignoring your original-character-do-not-steal? It’s just DnD. IT’S A FUCKING GAME. WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU, BRO?

My dad heard that and knocked on my door to ask what’s going on/tell me off for swearing, so I hopped off the call to explain myself and then went to bed. 

When I opened Discord again the next morning, Watermelon had either left or been banned, and the mods had added a hotlines channel and PMed me to explain that there was more to Watermelon’s meltdown than just “being a big baby” as soon as they pieced together what happened. 

Watermelon and I share a couple other servers and they went from chronically online in both to radio silent. They also haven't unfriended anyone from the server as far as I can see, not even me. The campaign died. The dungeon master is traumatized and just plays in one-shots now. Watermelon had been running a campaign at the time; Raspberry started his own and poached a few of their players. I joined it too, bringing Cassius with me because I like him too much to give him up.

I was doing go-backs yesterday and went to the condiment aisle. There was a couple looking for something and I was holding a mouthful of water at the moment so I couldn't immediately ask them what they needed. But I noticed that a bottle of dijon mustard was out of place, so I moved it to reveal stone-ground mustard. The lady's face lit up and she grabbed a bottle. Helping customers on purpose is nice and all but happy little accidents feel like crack.

A few months ago during gobacks again, I helped an old lady find a tub of dip she liked, and she couldn't find an expiration date on it. I joked that maybe it was stuffed so full of preservatives that it'd never expire. Apparently she's one of those chemical-phobic organic-only people and that spooked her so bad she almost put it back, but I took a look at the ingredients and told her that dextrose is just sugar, sodium benzoate is another kind of salt, and guar gum comes from beans. That reassured her enough to buy it after all.

Also, whenever customers are looking for something I have in my gobacks pile, I'll just hand it to them.

Probably toeing the line of rule 2 here. As a Latina whose name irl name is also Celeste, my name is pronounced with the final E. But the entire media is pronouncing Celeste, another Latina's, name without it. Non-Spanish speakers get my name wrong every single time without fail, and I wonder if that's what's happening here too. Sure d4vd rhymed her name with chest, obsessed, and cigarettes, but considering how he treated her, can we trust him to even bother learning to pronounce her name right?

Thought that'd be more awkward, which is why I'd avoided eye contact the previous times I did this (also autism but that's neither here nor there). Not much option to avoid eye contact after being addressed directly, though, so I decided to do a power move and stare him down.

edit: other people's leftovers. I didn't even buy anything myself

Title. I used to find talking to people exhausting and I thought that I'd feel the same way when I had to coordinate with my co-workers or show customers around, but I didn't. Hell, I even feel good about myself when I help a customer find an item. I actually do like talking to people when there's a goal at the end of the conversation.