u/derederellama

I have a burning question regarding the iconic Ross vs Rachel letter fight in "The One With The Jellyfish." So, it opens with the two of them cuddling in Rachel's bed, and she starts saying how glad she is that Ross chose to take accountability for sleeping with another woman. But Ross is unable to contain himself any longer and screams, "WE WERE ON A BREAK!" Which kickstarts the big funny fight.

When he screams that, it immediately cuts to Monica outside darting up from behind the table in fear, right? That's how the scene plays out when I watch it on YouTube and Crave (and random instagram/facebook reels when they pop up, as well). But I swear there is a version where it doesn't cut to Monica, and we actually see Ross yelling right into Rachel's ear with her cringing away and covering her head. I can picture it incredibly clearly in my mind! But I can't find this clip anywhere, and I recently sold my Friends vhs tapes at a yard sale, so I can't check those either. Does anyone else remember this?? Or did I create a really vivid false memory for myself? lol

I've recently taken up reading regularly again, and I think it's been really good for me. However, something happens every time I read a book I really enjoy that makes me feel silly and sensitive: I mourn so deeply for it once I'm finished. I'm talking to the point of trying not to burst into tears because I thought about it too hard while in public. Usually, starting a new book - especially if it's by the same author - eases this pain for me, but I'd say on average, it takes me a month or two to truly get over it. Sometimes, I love a book or series so much that I might get misty-eyed thinking about it even years later. Certain characters and narratives I just get so emotionally attached to, it almost feels like a breakup or something when they're finished. I hate knowing I won't be able to consume something so great for the first time ever again.

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I have also felt this before from films and television series, but not at this level of intensity. There's just something about reading, possibly because it's typically a longer journey + it feels more intimate when it's in my own imagination rather than already existing visually irl?

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Currently reading a book I found in my room that I bought as a teenager and forgot about. I started it a week ago, and it looks like I've got about five chapters left. It's only been in my head for a week, and I'm in tears today over it almost being over. 😭 As I was crying earlier, I started to wonder how insane I am for this, so I've come here to inquire whether this happens to anyone else.

I was a regular cutter for most of my adolescence. I was the subject of several intensely embarrassing family interventions because of it, but every time they begged me to stop, I would just find more discreet places to do it (always got caught in the end, though). When I was 16, all the blades in my household were put in lockboxes, and in my desperation to break skin, I just started scratching at the same spot with my nails until it became raw, then re-picking the scabs off that same wound over and over. It began as a deliberate attempt at hurting myself and a replacement for cutting... but as months went by, it became a compulsion that I cannot physically control. I very quickly learned to localize my picking to just the feet because it's the easiest part of myself to keep hidden. I just wear socks at all times until I'm alone. I can't remember the last time I was barefooted in another person's presence because my feet are so scarred and missing most of their toenails. I've never even had sex without keeping my socks on. I've lived my whole adult life so far like this, and I hate it.

I feel like my current excoriation habit has some similar underlying emotional drives, but it's still very distinct from cutting to me. Cutting occured only in times of high distress, and it also just generally required more effort to complete. But the picking happens without me even realizing it more often than not. I often enter a trance when I do it and will continue doing it for hours without even thinking. And the pain it causes is something I tolerate but do not enjoy one bit, unlike the pain I got from cutting which usually soothed me. I don't ever remember regretting cutting myself, but I very frequently go too far with the picking and end up trying not to walk funny in public because the sole of my foot is completely raw, and I'm always angry with myself for days or even weeks following. Yet as soon as the skin there becomes peelable again, I take it right off. I can't stop doing it for the life of me!

I sometimes think "at least I'm no longer cutting" to feel better about it, but I know that's me lying to myself. I don't feel proud at all to tell my psychiatrist that I'm clean from cutting because the skin picking still technically counts as self-harm and is honestly a much worse problem for me now than cutting ever was. It's gotten to the point where I've even considered taking up cutting again to stop myself from picking 😭😭🫠

Has anything like this happened to anyone else?