u/enkelinieto

I was diagnosed in 2001, but a few of these symptoms are new to me. I had a really bad flare that started Saturday night, I could feel the butterfly rash coming, it was making my scalp’s hurt and my lips were getting puffy, along with some major brain fog by the end of my shift. Had to call out Sunday because I had a very angry, bright red butterfly rash, it felt as if I’d rolled around in fiberglass and someone poured boiling water down my back. The one that often throws off my husband is when I say my hair hurts. I think something happened when I got COVID a few years ago because I’ve never had a moment where I said my hair hurts before. I went to the hospital in 2021 for possibly the most severe flare since my diagnosis. Now my skin hurts, but I have no hives like I used to get, I still get puffy eyes, lips and fingers, which makes me look like I’m having an allergic reaction. I know that if I had gone to work Sunday, I would have had a breakdown. Wearing my most lightweight nightgown was painful and I know wearing a t-shirt and the vest I have to wear would’ve been more painful. Add to that the lack of energy, it would’ve been very obvious to my managers and maybe some customers just how bad I was feeling. I have a lot of regulars who are used to a very bubbly person, when I’m in pain, I get very quiet.

Pre-diagnosis, I would look like I was having a severe allergic reaction. Now, I really only have the butterfly rash and sometimes my eyes and lips get a little puffy. My husband has had his hand smacked away because he touched a spot that, for lack of a better description, felt like road rash. I used to get HUGE dinner plate sized hives, they gave off heat… now there will be huge areas that’re so sensitive that clothing is painful. I have days where I can say “my hair hurts” and I’m scared of wearing anything other than a super simple nightgown. I’ll get hives where ever there’s elastic (ie: bra, socks, panties) the ribcage is often the most painful place. I currently look like Quasimodo with one puffy eye, I’m trying to figure out how to slow the progression of this flare so I can actually cook dinner, hard to cook with an eye puffed shut and swollen fingers.

Scarlett St Clair’s Touch of/Game of series is a Hades and Persephone series. Touch of titles are from Persephone’s perspective and Game of is Hades’ perspective. Do you think it would be worth doing this on kindle? I already have the physical books, but carrying 2 books around might look weird if I’m killing time in a doctor’s office/waiting room.

I had a coworker at my last job, nihilistic, always pissed off at the world, but at the same time obsessing over his ex. He was considerably younger than me, I'm 40 and he's in his 20's, then he'd always be complaining about not having money, when he had a new tattoo every time I saw him.

Apparently he didn't like my manic pixie energy, I was too bubbly and happy and I talked to the customers too much. You know what? I know one specific couple always came to me specifically BECAUSE I talked to both of them, even though the wife was bound to a wheel chair and non-verbal because of a stroke. I had my regulars who, I knew their orders before they got to the deli. I was always the one giving little kids treats.

I even had a customer in awe that I knew what a piece of meat was that he'd given me. He came to the deli with a vacuum sealed piece of meat along with one of the managers so I knew we actually had the go ahead to work on what he'd given me. I took the plastic off, looked it over then went "Sir? Is this an Iberico Ham?" he seemed pretty stunned and told me it was. I asked if it would be okay to sample some slices since I was cutting 3 pounds of pork paper thin. there were 5 of us total, including Mr. Grumpy.

When I was finished cutting the meat and gave the customer his bags, queue Mr. Sunshine "So, what's the big deal?" I couldn't help it "Try it first and I'll tell you..." my 2 other coworkers had tried theirs and commented it was better than the prosciutto in the fridge. "Iberico Pork... he basically handed me the pork equivalent of Kobe Beef." Then came the questions from the other two on why I knew what it was... I was a food major in college. I told them how the pigs were wild and ate truffles and only resided in Spain and Portugal aka The Iberian Peninsula.

Anyone else have these moments at work? I mean, I'm always bubbly and happy, but there's something special when I get super excited over a (in this case) piece of meat. I've commented on people's jewelry, knowing all the gemstones (magpie energy) and I love talking about the cultural clothes that people wear. I know my hyper fixations were definitely interesting to them, but everyone in the deli deemed to be surprised on what I knew about... idk... do we give off some sort of vibe that we should be dumber? lol

Okay, we’re both autistic and I understand him fairly well. He feels he’ll fit better in apparel because he’s good at organizing things. I just feel bad that he feels he has to change where he works because customers tell him to smile or say something to managers about him not smiling. He’s perfectly professional, just stoic. In the whole year I’ve known him, I’ve managed to make him laugh once. I’ve heard women tell him to smile and I’ve been tempted to speak up and ask how they’d feel if a man told them to smile, because I know it happens all the time and we hate it, seems hypocritical to tell him to smile.

I was proud when this happened at my last job, I had memorized certain customers’ orders and I sometimes had their product on the slicer by the time they got to me. Now I have customers who look for me specifically as a cashier now, some because I know how to bag the groceries.

I’ve made jokes about my autism, “I have a system” one guy even said he looks for me because I don’t crush his bread.

Another is a family with a low functioning autistic girl. I know how to handle her and it seems all the people with autistic children look for me because I know to lower my voice and I know how to stop tears and meltdowns with stickers. With the autistic customers I just say “like sees like” and let them know I understand, especially if I see stimming.

As a military spouse, you find ways to keep yourself busy when your other half is deployed, especially when you’re a sub wife and it’s weeks if not months of no emails. I got a notice while we were living in base housing (during the pandemic) that I could not have my garden in pots, everything had to be in the ground.

Background: We were supposed to move but then COVID happened, the gardening started pre-pandemic but then I got more into it when I found out we couldn’t leave. I originally did some basil, oregano and tomatoes in pots, but got a notice that I couldn’t have potted plants.

Reason I was petty: I got notices for things like the AC units still being in October first, but it was still in the mid 80’s.

However, if I needed THEM to do anything it was like pulling teeth. A hornet’s nest twice the size of a basketball? The fire department ended up taking care of it because they were tired of waiting. When the pipes burst in our house? They berated me and the following conversation happened:

Housing: If you’re letting the dog pee in the house, there’s going to be an extra cleaning fee.

Me: (yes, I know my comment probably wasn’t the right thing to say, but I was furious) One, even if he DID pee in the house TODAY, that sound was fucking loud and it probably scared him. Two, I have seizures! There are probably more piss stains, and blood, in the carpet from me than him. (That almost got my husband to laugh… not that a pissed off wife is funny)

But long before the incident with the pipes there were other small issues that after 4 years I just ended up going. My garden goes in the ground? We’re staying here 3 more years? I’m growing oregano… and you’re going to have to deal with it when I leave. It’s been 2 years, I wouldn’t be surprised if it has taken over half the front yard. You see, oregano can be very invasive and VERY difficult to get rid of. It really took root while I was there. I was constantly going out and, well, not pruning… just getting little sprigs for cooking. But when we left, I pulled up the little mini dividers that were keeping it from taking over the yard. They’re going to have to get REALLY creative to get rid of it.

A recent phone call to my next door neighbor there? A new family has moved in, and when he told the wife what the plant was, she was ecstatic! So, plant’s still there and HUGE! 😈

Edit: Getting a lot of comments about mint, there was already mint when we got there as well as strawberries.

You guys will probably understand this better than most, my husband tries, but all he really sees is wife is in pain. Today my hair hurts, wearing a T-shirt hurt… it was difficult to take a nap because anything touching my skin hurt. It’s hard to explain when I have bad days at work, coworkers and regulars do notice my off days and it’s hard to explain when I’m asked what’s wrong because some people seem to think something happened for me not to be my chipper self. I’m just happy my job doesn’t care if I don’t wear a bra, that would be THE most painful thing to have to do. In high school I would get welts wherever there was elastic. I’m also Autistic and my father was in the Air Force, so military humor + Autism has landed me in hot water in the past. A manager said something about me not wearing a bra and my response was “They’re not big enough to hang out the bottom of my shirt, and if the men can’t handle a woman without a bra that’s not my fault. If I wear a bra tonight, I’ll have welts on my rib cage and you’ll have to send me home early because of how much pain I’d be in.” I’m a C cup… so grapefruit sized?