u/funeralroses_

My surgery is scheduled 🥳 but I have to pay the surgeon before my pre-surgery consultation 😕 how much did you pay out of pocket for the surgeon, hospital, anesthesiology, etc.? My insurance is decent and I’m sure I’ll be able to afford the out of pocket cost, but idk what it is yet and I’m curious as to what the number could be

23F. I’m a (devout) Christian. I’ve developed some health issues that may impact my fertility. I want to be ready to have a baby in the next 2 years. I’m going great academically (grad student) and on track to be fully financially independent with a great career very soon.

The thing is, in 2 years I’ll only be 25. The older I get, the younger I feel and the more I realize how much I don’t know about life. Despite this, I would be more than willing to make whatever sacrifices necessary to have a baby at that age. The thing I can’t get behind lately is marriage.

As most young Christian woman, I idolized marriage when I was younger, and I thought it would be all sunshine, rainbows and Disney movies. But from observing the marriages of the people around me and the ones I grew up witnessing, marriage can often be a major disadvantage for women. I’d much rather be tied down by a baby than a marriage. But due to my faith, I can’t have a baby without being married (well I can, but I’d rather please God). I recognize that my stance also comes from a place of unhealed trauma (dysfunctional family, parents from a patriarchal/conservative culture, etc).

I want to be able to allow myself to be loved by a man one day, and to fully love him with no doubts or fears holding me back. But I feel like that’s just a fantasy, and the reality is that marriage would hurt me and put me at a disadvantage. I think marriage itself is awesome, but the way humans execute it is bad. And being a Christian adds another layer of complexity. I’ve witnessed that a lot of Christian men are obsessed with submission and ruling over wives and children. I just want to find one that’s not on some weird power trip, marry him, and start my family before it’s too late for me.

Has anyone else ever felt this way? How did you overcome and end up in a secure relationship?

23F. I’m a (devout) Christian. I’ve developed some health issues that may impact my fertility. I want to be ready to have a baby in the next 2 years. I’m going great academically (grad student) and on track to be fully financially independent with a great career very soon.

The thing is, in 2 years I’ll only be 25. The older I get, the younger I feel and the more I realize how much I don’t know about life. Despite this, I would be more than willing to make whatever sacrifices necessary to have a baby at that age. The thing I can’t get behind lately is marriage.

As most young Christian women, I idolized marriage when I was younger, and I thought it would be all sunshine, rainbows and Disney movies. But from observing the marriages of the people around me and the ones I grew up witnessing, marriage can often be a major disadvantage for women. I’d much rather be tied down by a baby than a marriage. But due to my faith, I can’t have a baby without being married (well I can, but I’d rather please God). I recognize that my stance also comes from a place of unhealed trauma (dysfunctional family, parents from a patriarchal/conservative culture, etc).

I want to be able to allow myself to be loved by a man one day, and to fully love him with no doubts or fears holding me back. But I feel like that’s just a fantasy, and the reality is that marriage would hurt me and put me at a disadvantage. I think marriage itself is awesome, but the way humans execute it is bad. And being a Christian adds another layer of complexity. I’ve witnessed that a lot of Christian men are obsessed with submission and ruling over wives and children. I just want to find one that’s not on some weird power trip, marry him, and start my family before it’s too late for me.

Has anyone ever felt this way? How did you overcome and end up in a secure relationship? Will therapy fix this? Am I asking the right subreddit? 😅