u/germanduderob

Obviously most people here are aroallo, but there are so many different kinds! We should be able to add our exact aro identity/microlabel and sexual orientation as it would also make it easier to find people with a similar or even the same identity - that said, any fellow bisexual bellusromantics? 👀

I'd probably add silly stuff to mine too, like: "romantic kissing: 😤 - platonic/sexual kissing: 😍"

What would your user flair be if you could customize it?

Okay, so this isn't directly related to asexuality, but more so aromanticism, I suppose, however I'm asking this question primarily to alloromantic aces as I think you guys can give more insight on this than alloallos.

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So I just saw a post claiming there were three kinds of singles; "fun singles" who go on dates, have fun with various people, and aren't really worried about finding someone asap, "moderate singles" who are neutral about dating and romance and are fine either way, and "sad singles" who are basically incels.

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Now... is it just me or is "single and no interest in dating" missing? Is it THAT unusual not to date? Do alloromantics just assume that people must be either in a romantic relationship or looking/dating, while not even considering the option that some might not have any interest in dating whatsoever?

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I actually have experienced similar things before, with people just assuming I was dating or in a relationship. An online friend who knows I'm aro once asked me something about dating culture in the country I'm from, which obviously I couldn't answer, and they only realized I'm probably not the best person to ask this after I pointed it out. And then another person I had never interacted with prior once just casually referred to "my partner" and how they hoped I was in a happy relationship with them... I have no idea what could've prompted this as nothing I said implied I had a partner in any way, shape, or form.

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I knew amatonormativity runs deep in society, but it's honestly shocking to see just to what extent that's the case.

A bit of context: I used to identify as ace (aroace), but realized I'm just aro after all. One reason I figured this out actually has to do with this topic - whenever I'd see a post in this sub asking how people felt about kissing the majority of comments would say they didn't like it, even a lot of alloromantic asexuals would say they didn't, but still expressed romantic attraction in other ways.

There certainly seems to be a correlation between disliking not just sex, but also kissing, and by extension sometimes even all physical touch, so I started wondering if perhaps to some, if not many people, kissing is actually more of a sexual than romantic thing. This explained for me why I actually like and desire it - maybe I, too, actually think of it as sexual rather than romantic which is why I still desire it.