u/gobogorilla

I posted on my lunch catch-up/date the other date and I appreciate all the feedback. I had decided to just treat it as lunch with an old friend and not attach any thoughts of a relationship to it.

However, it turns out she is now divorced (3 years ago).

We had a great visit and find that our situations are similar and our friendship seems to still be strong. After lunch I got a TERRIFIC hug from her and she expressed the desire to get together again soon. I don’t know where, if anywhere, this will go but I feel comfortable now seeing what’s next.

Thanks again for all the feedback!!!!!!!

I have a catch-up/lunch date tomorrow with a woman I’ve known for probably 20 years. I haven’t seen her in about four years. There has always been a friendship between us, with some maybe-more-than-friendship tension underneath it.

I’m very interested in a relationship with her and want to see where things go.

THE RUB: The last I knew, she was married and I think she still is.

If she is, I will probably pull back to friendship status—but part of me doesn’t want to. I haven’t had an emotional or romantic connection with anyone since my wife passed away six years ago, and I long for that kind of connection.

TELL ME: I WOULD BE THE BAD GUY IF I PURSUED THIS RELATIONSHIP?

I already know the answer, but I want a relationship soooooo badly. I am so freakin’ lonely.

2 days ago I posted about dealing with SI - Today I realized I am swinging manic. I am a retired attorney due to my mental health issues. This morning I decided that what my area needed was another washed-up attorney offering to fill out forms for people and I will make soooooo much $$$ that I will be able to get my financial life back on track. This is my normal, grandiose feelings and plans to make bunches of money and become successful. I am on my second pot of coffee and want more. I have been up since 2am. and my head is jingling, if you know what I mean. This is such a "fun" ride!!!!!

2 days ago I posted about dealing with SI - Today I realized I am swinging manic. I am a retired attorney due to my mental health issues. This morning I decided that what my area needed was another washed-up attorney offering to fill out forms for people and I will make soooooo much $$$ that I will be able to get my financial life back on track. This is my normal, grandiose feelings and plans to make bunches of money and become successful. I am on my second pot of coffee and want more. I have been up since 2am. and my head is jingling, if you know what I mean. This is such a "fun" ride!!!!!

I (M63) remember back when we were kids how the whole world stank of cigarettes. There were no smoke free places, airplane, store, sport stadium, restaurant - EVERYWHERE. I was working in a restaurant back in the early 80s and remember when they first divided the store and made part non-smoking.

This is a true occurrence my late wife wrote about:

A few years ago, maybe five, I was an e-Bay junkie. I'd browse for anything that lit on my mind-housewares, books, classic toys. One particular item--a metal lunchbox that I used in elementary school had me searching and eventually bidding. It was perfect, just a few minor scratches, thermos still intact, very good condition. I bid. And waited. And had the winning bid until the final few seconds of the auction wore down and a sniper stole the coveted lunchbox from me. I mentioned it to my husband, who I thought hadn't been paying attention at the time.

Fast-forward to Christmas of whatever year it was: I opened a special gift from my darling husband, and there it was: the much-coveted lunchbox. Only...it wasn't the one I'd been bidding on. No, this one was dinged up, with paint gashes. I inspected it closely, then unlocked the metal clasp and opened the hinged door. No thermos either. Instead, inside, an aged strip of black Dymo label with the letters L-a-c-i-n-d-a spelled out, was taped on the floor of the box. My mind stirred. Could it be? I mean, really? Could my husband have managed to somehow reach back into my childhood, fish through all of my silly belongings, and present me with the very lunchbox I used? How?

I believe God used my husband and that lunchbox to teach me how individual and personal He is. It does seem (even to me) too marvelous to believe that He would nudge my husband to search e-Bay for a similar lunchbox, find one and be a winning bidder, only to discover that it is THE very item I grew up with. The item was shipped from Texas, how it got there in the first place is a mystery, other than perhaps my mother may have sold it at a yard sale when I was a teenager. The strip of Dymo label I do recall very well. In sixth grade, [MF](a friend) spelled out my name with a label maker and often spelled my name Lacinda, rather than Lucinda. She fastened it to my lunchbox, but I removed it from the outside and placed it inside.

Now, I know some of my friends and even relatives roll their eyes and mock this story, and in all good-natured fun it does seem, even to me, most unbelievable.

And yet, I believe.

I (M63) married my high school sweetheart and we were together 42 years (39 married) She passed in 2020 from cancer. She is the only lady I have ever dated, kissed, held hands with, been intimate with, anything. Am I the only one our age that finds themselves trying to learn how to date and be with a new person with very little experience?

I don't want to spend the years I have left alone. Not asking just about sex but, about all the other parts of intimacy with another person. Heck, I don't even know if I kiss right or not (LOL).

How do I get the confidence to date when I have almost experience dating, or all the other stuff? THANKS for any thoughts on this.