u/haerinzuu

First of all, i want to mention that i don't mean to be disrespectful towards neurodivergent people at all, I'm genuinely curious and would like to know more about it. If it sounds disrespectful, I'm sorry, but it's far from my intention, however, i can delete my post if needed.

So, a few years ago i was in therapy (not anymore, currently) and my therapist told me i was HSP, even if it's not a official diagnosis itself, that i fit right into it.

I looked for it on the internet, but some sources say it is neurodivergence and others say it's not, so I'm confused.

It is true that i can somewhat relate to some symptoms of other neurodivergences, but i don't think i personally am any of those. (but I could be wrong, of course!) I also have a brain-gut axis problem, and i don't know if that's something that's giving me any symptoms that I'm mistakingly understanding them as neurodivergence.

I found this subreddit, so i thought it could be nice to try asking here to see everyone's opinion here. Thank you so much to everyone in advance and again, i apologize if it sounds disrespectful in any way

first of all, i deeply apologize if this questions seem rude or disrespectful, i ask out of genuine curiosity, since i want to know more of myself, that being said, i'll give some context first.

5 years ago, i threw up all over myself at high school, which obviously made me have to go home. the issue was that it kept repeating itself for a few weeks, until my doctor told me to go to the stomach specialist (sorry if it's not the correct term, english isn't my first lenguage). i've been struggling with stomach stuff ever since i was a little kid, but it was often mistaken as me not wanting to go to school.

it had been a LONG journey of tests, some that hurt, some that don't. i got diagnosed with functional abdominal pain and chronic gastritis scars inside my guts.

the issue is that i'm 24/7 nauseous, in pain, and i never know when i will be getting a flare up, since i randomly spend hours throwing up a random day of every month, making me be extremely anxious everytime the 15th of the month come, since if i haven't threw up already, it will come soon.

after overthinking a lot, realizing that i had to drop out, can't do a lot of things to prevent flare-ups, anxious as hell of working since i know i won't be able to, and other "limitating" things, i thought.. what if i'm disabled? but for some reason, it feels wrong to just randomly use that label, that's why i came here to ask, since i don't want to seem disrespectful at all.

i know i'm missing some stuff i want to say, but i can't think of anything else atm, if i have to answer to anything, i will. but i really wanted to ask it. ^^

I've been making tests for around 6 years now, diagnosed with functional abdominal pain and chronic gastritis scars in my guts. I'm always nauseous and i hate it.

these 4 months had been... rough. since once a month i violently spend my morning throwing up and having diarrhoea at the same time, which made me develop an even worse emetophobia.

every month when it's near the 15th, i start to panic, cuz i feel like it could soon come, and I'm terrified :(

I've spent a few days crying at night cuz i don't know what to do, I'm even scared of going out lately in case i get a crisis. my worst issue is that next month, near the end of the month i have a few exams and i have to be there from 9am to 19pm... and I'm so scared of being sick that day.

i just don't know what to do and I'm so damn desperate at this point. I'm always at the verge of crying just by thinking that i can't do anything. i really want to vent to my parents but I'm too much of a scaredy cat and i can't do it. not cuz they are not supportive, but cuz i hate crying with people and i know I'm going to end up in tears. idk anymore and I'm tired :(

(sorry if something doesn't make sense, English isn't my first language)