u/hanachan707

TEXTS WILL BE POSTED IN COMMENTS BELOW🙏🏻

i have gathered enough courage to confess to my childhood best friend and did it today over text (because we are currently long distance and I got jealous when she spoke about a guy she liked and then stopped liking). well… I don’t know if she understood that i meant it in a romantic way???

I am neurodivergent and i already have great trouble understanding what people mean when they say something but this is a whole new level. yet is it platonic if she calls you her wife and sweetheart, compliments you, calls you for 9+ hours and tells you she loves you at least three times a day? or am I just an idiot?💔💔

i guess this very much corresponds with pride month. i love my childhood best friend, she is my only safe person (outside of family) and the only friend i have shown my true self to without feeling shame or embarrassment. she communicates so clearly and understands when i need time in complete solitude

i have felt different about her ever since we were kids and this feeling didn’t go away even after we stopped talking for 5 years💔 only became stronger after we reconnected 6 months ago. it’s the same for her.

we haven’t had the chance to have a deep talk about our relationship and where it’s going (as we currently live in different cities) but um. it’s in my plans. hopefully in hers as well..

i just wanted to make this post to share my joy and love and celebrate the existence of emotions. they are fascinating and terrifying at the same time. i wish every woman reading this a splendid day!!!

and I don’t mean it in a ‘i don’t know how i feel about xyz right now so I can’t tell you’ type of way (though I experience it quite often too), but in a ‘my emotions feel incredibly fake and completely nonsensical only once I vocalize them’ way.

on the rare occasion when i do understand what i feel and manage to put it into words that then leave my mouth (or that then are sent online, doesn’t matter!), my entire struggle suddenly feels like i am exaggerating it. i immediately start thinking whether or not my feelings were true/real/genuine in the first place. if it’s a real life interaction, i feel so insecure and uncomfortable out of nowhere and i am very positive that it shows

it is very hard to put my experience into words, but i did my best to describe it while still making some sense. so, did anyone else go through this?

i have recently (well, it has almost been 4 months lol) reconnected with a childhood best friend i had a dumb fight with around 5 years ago. just for context, her and i have been very, very close before that argument. straight up almost confessing our love and affection for one another kind of close. we didn’t date though, but she wanted us to.. so did i! still do

i am old enough to understand what friendships are supposed to look and feel like, but what about close friendships? my best friend genuinely wants us to move in together over the summer (we are currently living in different cities and haven’t seen each other since the falling out), often tells me how nice and sweet i am, I also get at least one ‘i love you’ during the day. our calls last for 5+ hours, too. don’t get me started on the curious reposts online

is this genuinely how best friends act towards one another or is there more to it? i am so cheeks at understanding such things which is why i need a tad bit of guidance 💔 I also apologize if my post isn’t coherent. english isn’t my first language