Things people say…

”Doesn’t it come with bacon?”
Yes we still have to ask.

“Give me everything.”
I don’t know what your everything entails. Do you mean mikes way? Or do you mean everything that you see? What do you not want because im 90% positive you don’t want everything.

“Give it to me mikes way. Add lettuce, tomatoes and onions.”
…… so mikes way?

“Banana, jal, and lettuce, then can you add the mikes way?”
……… so you mean the juice and spices?

”can you let mike have his way with it?”
You’re not funny, you make everyone uncomfortable, and you’re a thirty year old man. Get a life.

”what do you think I’d like?”
Dude i literally don’t even know you, what do you mean you want me to guess what you’d eat today?

”why didn’t you ask me if i wanted it hot? I want a hot sandwich and i can’t believe you didn’t ask!”
We’re literally trained not to ask. Some stores don’t even allow it. Plus you added a bunch of stuff already, im not letting your lettuce and tuna near my grill.”

”can you sub ham for turkey on the number 8?”
No but i can charge you a 7 with bacon?

”can i make my own sandwich?”
If you open your eyes, tilt your head to and to the left, you will see that we indeed do have the number 8, ham, turkey and cheese.

”can you sub ham for turkey on the 13?”
Not if you want to pay extra for the meat. Inventory isn’t cheap.

”does the veggie/meatless have meat?”
…..

”can i have the pickle sandwich?”
No because we’re jersey mikes not jimmy johns.

”can you do this sandwich i saw on tik tok?”
I can give you a sandwich off our menu and you can tell me the toppings AFTER I PREPARED THE SANDWICH

**edit: will add on when i remember things that I’ve been asked

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u/imnotafurrybro — 4 days ago

Wdym carve the bread?😭

You’re telling me you want me to deflesh my babies? The bread i spent hours on?! The fluffiest softest BEST BREAD IN THE WORLD

AND YOU WANT ME TO CARVE IT

I AM PATERNAL FOR MY BREAD

I was told by corporate that i made the best bread that he’s ever seen and you want mE TO CARVE IT OUT AND JUST TOSS IT?!?!?!!?!!!11!1??!1?1!

TELL ME IM NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO FEELS PATERNAL TOWARDS THE BREAD ESPECIALLY IF YOU OPENED

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u/imnotafurrybro — 18 days ago
▲ 1 r/AskVet

What’s the best thing to do?

I really don’t know what else to do.

I have 8 dollars to my name, need to buy a car, and im having to give my next paycheck for my own 600$ dentist surgery.

I have no pet insurance, and i can’t afford a vet at all.

My dogs been having seizures nightly, we keep her in the bathroom at night because it’s the best place for her as she won’t bump anything (she still managed to splatter blood everywhere)

She’s a 5 year old malignois mix with chow and she started having spaced out seizures but just last night at 1 in the morning and at 7 in the morning, she had seizures that lasted 2 minutes and resulted in frothing, peeing herself, and exhaustion from her

I feel like the best thing would be to euthanize her but i obviously don’t want to and am trying not to cry as i type this at work

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u/imnotafurrybro — 2 months ago

WAR IS OVER

AFTER HAVING MY CUP IN ME SINCE APRIL MY PERIOD FINALLY LET UP AND I NO LONGER NEED TO HAVE IT IN ME!!!! IM ON BIRTHCONTROL AND CAN FREELY DO THINGS WITHOUT WORRYING ABOUT THAT SUCKER POPPING OR LEAKING

u/imnotafurrybro — 3 months ago

How to unswell

It’s caused by an infection that im having surgery for on Tuesday. Im in amoxicillin, ibuprofen, and don’t eat solid food at the moment. The surgery is for wisdom teeth affecting it and to extract the one tooth that’s the cause of it

Edit/update:

Im going to the hospital first thing in the morning. Im up rn to take my meds and swelling still hasn’t gone down, but ill listen and get it looked at. Wish me luck

u/imnotafurrybro — 3 months ago

(TW!Dead bird)What bird is this?

I plan on preserving this beautiful guy but i also want to id it so its not just on display but also as a biology piece

South texas rgv!

u/imnotafurrybro — 3 months ago

Imma beat him up!! 😤

(Nsfw cause of poop talk)

Im gonna beat my boy up!(not really lol) He’s usually so cool and chill!!!! He likes my glasses and likes to explore so i usually let him wander around on top of me while I’m in bed. I fed him tuesday a pinky and he drinks water. The dummy decided the best place to poop was IN MY HAIR 😤 pics are of the nastiest man

So here are the questions.

  1. What does a healthy poop look like?
  2. While he doesnt necessarily like being held, once he’s comfortable, he’s exploring my shoulders/hair/glasses he’s a curious boy and i think its cute! But im worried he might’ve been so stressed that he pooped so i can put him back :/ again, he’s chill once let alone to explore but feeling snake pee on my shoulder RIGHT AFTER A SHOWER wasn’t great :,)
u/imnotafurrybro — 3 months ago

Im debating upgrading elote into 30 gallon vertical or should i stay at a 10 gallon horizontal? I want him to have more room and theyre semi arborial(they climb? Idk how to spell)

My shelf comfortably houses the ten gallon and the 30 but not a 20 gallon or anything bigger horizontally

u/imnotafurrybro — 4 months ago

My snake elote is a strange little guy, is it normal for him to pick up the water bowl and kinda toss it around? I literally JUST filled it with water and he decided to lift it up and drop the water in his tank :,) he buried himself for a moment but then went back to his hide. I haven’t picked him up yet and dont try to stress him out, only putting my hand in to give him his water

u/imnotafurrybro — 4 months ago

Hi guys! Im new to owning corn snakes, this is my first one! I’ve decided to name him(was told it was a boy) Elote Preparado because of his colors lol. I would love to hold him and handle him, but in order for him to be fully preparado, he needs to acclimate! No touching until broski takes a few pinkies! 🥰🌽

u/imnotafurrybro — 4 months ago