u/imnotdeadlmao

So i know fully I was sexually assaulted once by my ex. But, I was thinking about the past and im not sure if I was assaulted a different time. So they just got on birth control and I was still unsure, I said that I'd rather have a condom just in case. They have a disease where they have a high tolerance to everything. All their prescription drugs are at the highest doses because their body is abnormally good at fighting stuff like that. Anyway, we drank. I was drunk. I do not know if they were buzzed or not, because they acted normal. The most I've ever seen them was tipsy but it wasn't that night. Anyway we were making out and they were on top of me and straddling me and I was like "fuck it it's fine". I'm scared my judgement is cloudy because they did rape me like a few months later. So in retrospect all I can see is them as a monster. I dont know if im applying it to this or if it was actually assault. If it wasn't please let me know, I'd rather tell the truth and say they raped me once than add a lie to it. I guess that's why im asking here.