u/justafunngai

I was in the hospital for physical issues. My first day back to work was Tuesday this week and they told me they had to "eliminate my position"

So now I'm incredibly stressed out and no longer have health insurance. They offered severance but I had to sign not to sue or defame them. I had no choice but to take it because I'm poor.

I know I'm about to have an episode because insomnia has started. I can only do my best to take care of myself and ride this one out. It's annoying when you do all the things you're supposed to and life takes a giant shit on you.

This year has been the worst of my adult life so far:

-moved across the country with only the stuff that could fit in my tiny car

-New job start date was delayed a month

-car breaks down for good during my first week at new job

-have to buy a new car so added car payment & full coverage insurance to my bills

-living in a busted place with an 80 year old landlord

-started having liver issues in march

-gallbladder removal surgery in April which only made my issues worse

-liver issues got me hospitalized last week and they did not determine a cause

Like WTF is going on????

Thank you for listening.

Just watched this for the first time tonight and it definitely got me thinking.

As a schizophrenic person, I see Frank as a hallucination that sparks delusional psychosis. Schizophrenia sometimes makes me feel more important than I actually am when I'm in psychosis. It can also make me feel completely alone. Schizophrenic people are most likely to die by suicide. I interpreted the ending as a message to suicidal people saying that you aren't as alone as you thought you were, you do touch other people's lives, and people do care about you.

But I don't know if that was intentional and I wonder if the director even thought about actual schizophrenic people while writing this story. I don't think it was a great idea to give schizophrenic people the idea that our time travel delusions can actually be real and things are better off if we are dead.

I know that he goes deeper into the time travel shit in the director's cut and I don't think I care to watch that. I like to see this movie as a classic schizophrenic experience.

Just spent the last week in the hospital because I was not able to stay awake, confused, super nauseous, and off balance when walking.

Turned out my liver enzymes were pretty elevated, my ALT was 684 (which is like 19 times the upper limit). They did so much testing and even a liver biopsy that showed nothing. They ruled out viral, any infections, drug-induced hepatitis or autoimmune hepatitis. So they sent me home even though I still feel like shit.

3 days after I get home, I get 1 more test result back that says I'm positive 1:40 for anti-smooth muscle antibodies.

My GI said "this is nearly normal and does not indicate autoimmune hepatitis"

My doctor asked me if my symptoms could be related to mental health issues.....

So how the fuck else do I have hepatitis? If they've ruled out everything, why are my liver enzymes so high and why do I feel awful? I don't drink, I don't do drugs, I eat fairly well.

They offered referral to rheumatology and outpatient physical therapy, which is great, except that when I went back to work yesterday they told me they had to "eliminate my position" lol they fired me for being in the hospital. So now I no longer have health insurance.

I immediately applied for unemployment and medicaid when I got home but those things can take some time. I don't know why I still get shocked by how horrible and heartless everyone is.

I guess I just feel hopeless and like I might die before anyone bothers to figure this out.

#1 Hannibal - for obvious reasons

#2 Mason Verger - what a fucking nightmare of a person

#3 Freddie Lounds - I wish she died

#4 Jack - exploiting Will and bringing him to a point of no return

#5 Dr.Chilton - what a quack, he deserved what he got for fucking with people's minds

#6 Alana - completely throws Will away when he is framed despite how close they were and then fucks his boyfriend while she's at it

#7 Bedelia - just a real mind fuck right there

#8 Will - leaving Molly and their kid when he knows what going back will do to him

What do yall think?

I just finished the series tonight by the way and I am heart broken that Will Graham isn't on my tv anymore. I don't know what will fill this void.

Hi everyone, I have schizoaffective bipolar type. I tend to stay on the depressed side, but mixed episodes come out sometimes as well. These are so hard for me to get a grip on.

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I'm so IRRITABLE and I hate it! Every little thing pisses me off for no reason. I go from sobbing in despair to planning fun getaway trips. I can think clearly enough to ask myself why the hell I'm doing what I'm doing, but I can't stop doing the thing. I desperately need something to hold onto during these episodes and I'm not sure what can help keep me grounded.

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I am exhausted with myself during these times and I know my wife is too. The worst part about this disorder is the shame and regret from doing things you would never do if you weren't in an episode.

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I do the things I can that are in my control to stay stable, but sometimes episodes just happen and that isn't fucking fair.

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I saw a meme on facebook the other day that said neurodivergent people don't apply for jobs they know they aren't qualified for, but neurotypical people do.

And it definitely makes sense to me considering all of the mediocre management and leadership I've had in almost every job in my life.

So today I said fuck it and applied for a job that I don't have the experience for but I know I'd be good at. We'll see what happens!

I had surgery at 10:30am yesterday and left the hospital at 2:30pm. The pain was pretty rough and I needed assistance moving around to get to the bathroom and get in bed. I was VERY hungry which surprised me and I had a lot of crackers, jello, and miso soup. After eating, I pretty much slept the rest of the night.

I woke up at 6:30am today with a lot of pain and had to take prescription pain meds. I fell back asleep until 10:30am and was able to get out of the bed and go to the bathroom on my own! I've been managing the pain with Tylenol and Ibuprofen today. I did take a shower independently and that kind of sucked and made me really sleepy.

I'm about to eat a toasted pepperoni & cheese sandwich so wish me luck!