u/khokhaywala

Hey everyone,

I'm a summer research assistant at the Department of Electrical and Computer Engineering. I had spent the last few weeks at Kingston and since it's the summer, have not been able to meet up with many people. Would love to connect to people currently studying at Queen's (both undergrad and post grad + I'm a rising senior at my home university) even if it's remote or over discord.

A bit about myself. I love talking about basically anything from Sports to entertainment, politics, pop culture, gaming, art, history, philosophy etc so if you want a yapping buddy (some convos may end up being deep) it would be my pleasure. Would be down to meet up irl too if you are spending the summer on campus. Sending lots of love and best wishes to hopefully my future friends.

Hi everyone. I am writing this more to gauge if I have been dealt a unique experience or if this is truly the norm with Spas in Lahore (and perhaps other cities). I booked a one hour spa that was for the full body (yes ik I should have not been so naive) but the spa place (a very renowned one in Lahore that charges a fair amount of money) had explicitly communicated and marketed that towels would be used. Interestingly, they only had female masseuses but that was not a huge personal issue since massage therapists are supposed to be professionals for whom a massage is equivalent to a doctor operating on a patient (or at least I thought).

I get taken to one of the rooms where I am asked to wear a towel (as expected) and I lie down. Then comes the masseuse and essentially turns off the main lights of the room and lights up a candle. It came across as a bit too steamy for my liking but I assumed maybe all spa experiences are like this (it was my first time after all). 2 minutes into the massage, the masseuse (F) without asking removes the towel and starts working on my legs and hips without any covering. This being my first time caught me quite off guard and took a bit of time (a few minutes) to process before I could muster the energy to ask why the towel had been removed. She then replies by saying that this is how full body massages are done here and it would be difficult to apply oil with covering (if so then why ask me to wear a towel in the first place). At this point I am so taken back that it's difficult for me to question back and in fairness to the masseuse she tried her best to make it as relaxing/comfortable as possible (once she realized that I wasn't there for any "extra services", which seems to be the norm there). Finding it difficult to process what's happening, I ended up just letting her work the backside of my body without much rebuke, and she was quite nice and professional about it.

30 minutes later, when we get to the front side. I again had expected that I guess for this case she would put a towel back on or let me wear it. She asks me to turn over and now starts working on my front side of the body completely nude and starts by applying oil + strokes to the genitalia. I am not sure what word I would use to describe that experience (maybe a mixture of being slightly uncomfortable, shock, awkwardness and confusion) but again just the unforeseen sequence of events prompted no response from me (sort of like a freeze response). After working on the front side of my body (and again in fairness to the masseuse, very professionally) for 30 minutes. The full body massage was complete after which she asked me to put on a towel before she walked out (like she hasn't seen and touched every shade of my body already).

I am still trying to process the experience and as a consequence wanted to ask everyone here who has been to a spa (both men and women because she said that even the women here are fully naked) if this is usually what happens or was I dealt a different deck of cards. I must clarify that there was thankfully no sexual activity (or even the thought/discussion of it) in the 1 whole hour she was massaging, and was quite professional and welcoming given it was a fully nude man she was working with. But is this usually the case at fancy spas or have I just been misled? Because the vibe of the place, and per the masseuse in general, gave signals that people just come here for sexual gratification instead of an actual relaxing experience to clear up their body. That concludes my Ted Talk. I wish this was one large fiction story that I had made up for interactions but (sigh).

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Salaam everyone,

Eid Mubarak first of all. Need suggestions for possible ADHD therapists in Lahore (preferably F). I am a third year university student and honestly, despite all my best efforts and attempts. I have found it very difficult to be disciplined and consistent in my everyday habits. I have a decent CGPA but lack of discipline, leaving things to the end, forgetting key things, not following any consistent routine has meant I end up underperforming not just academically but in how I carry myself overall. I am not very organized in how I plan or execute things, often relying on close to deadline rush of adrenaline to get works done. I plan out many things but never follow up on them and also struggle with holding myself mentally during exam situations. Most worryingly, I have a horrible concept of time, am often late for classes, meetings and any set of activities I plan out for a day with time durations end up going way off the mark (apparently the most common symptom).

I have been recommended by several people to get a formal diagnosis and if necessary, treatment. Additionally, if I were to get diagnosed, how much would the medication cost? I would prefer keeping this away from my parents who have not been very warm to the idea of this whenever I have referenced it. TIA! The person should be trustworthy and keep things confidential.