u/kyuju19

ever since i was younger, i don’t recall looking back and memories/reminiscing my past. i’d look at photos and like a certain expression i had, or could recollect a certain location, but never could truly remember what i thought or felt in a certain situation.

as for my spiritual journey, there are so many things i have learned and studied, from fourteen years old til being twenty now, the eureka moments i would have.. this spiritual journey has been beautiful & brutal & numbing & nurturing.. all towards recently realizing i don’t remember things at all. maybe it’s a trauma response or maybe i truly live in the moment. i have to remind myself to remember what this all means & what ive learned/have been through

“remind myself to remember” was a code id kept with myself on what this human experience means, since we forget at birth

but recently it’s been really hard to get back in that state of pure consciousness, i’ve been easily tempted in laziness or sluggishness, numb again, and just with no motivation to continue/act upon things..

what are ways you remind yourself to remember that this is an infinite universe allowed to create & manifest things into existence? what allows you to always come back to center or gratitude?

idk if i’ve been in spiritual psychosis or if i am getting sucked back into the matrix or the old ways of living.. maybe this is me detaching and truly getting clear on what to hold on to & what to let go of.. but either way, i’m trying not to think too deeply into it

but it is rather weird & interesting how i “used to be so spiritual” but now it’s more of a blank state. but maybe that’s the point of it all? to be able to know internally even when all the circumstances convince you otherwise

i really want to be able to focus again instead of the original honeymoon phase when learning about spirituality or different concepts in hopes of escapism. but to truly ground myself in truth in the simplistic and most naked times

thank you, how’s this journey been treating you? what are core truths you hold dear & true to your soul throughout your process? what allows you to remind yourself to remember our purpose? what is the ultimate purpose?

ever since i was younger, i don’t recall looking back and memories/reminiscing my past. i’d look at photos and like a certain expression i had, or could recollect a certain location, but never could truly remember what i thought or felt in a certain situation.

as for my spiritual journey, there are so many things i have learned and studied, from fourteen years old til being twenty now, the eureka moments i would have.. this spiritual journey has been beautiful & brutal & numbing & nurturing.. all towards recently realizing i don’t remember things at all. maybe it’s a trauma response or maybe i truly live in the moment. i have to remind myself to remember what this all means & what ive learned/have been through

“remind myself to remember” was a code id kept with myself on what this human experience means, since we forget at birth

but recently it’s been really hard to get back in that state of pure consciousness, i’ve been easily tempted in laziness or sluggishness, numb again, and just with no motivation to continue/act upon things..

what are ways you remind yourself to remember that this is an infinite universe allowed to create & manifest things into existence? what allows you to always come back to center or gratitude?

idk if i’ve been in spiritual psychosis or if i am getting sucked back into the matrix or the old ways of living.. maybe this is me detaching and truly getting clear on what to hold on to & what to let go of.. but either way, i’m trying not to think too deeply into it

but it is rather weird & interesting how i “used to be so spiritual” but now it’s more of a blank state. but maybe that’s the point of it all? to be able to know internally even when all the circumstances convince you otherwise

i really want to be able to focus again instead of the original honeymoon phase when learning about spirituality or different concepts in hopes of escapism. but to truly ground myself in truth in the simplistic and most naked times

thank you, how’s this journey been treating you? what are core truths you hold dear & true to your soul throughout your process? what allows you to remind yourself to remember our purpose? what is the ultimate purpose?

i’m realizing all of this is truly to just have fun.. even social media, i am in the creative field and when i used to post out of genuine joy & fun for the creative energy my account was naturally attracting so much abundance.. the second it got to my head of how to do certain things, or what others might think—that’s when it became miserable for me + daunting/stressful to post..

now i’ve come to a post of realizing it’s all about having fun!! the things you wear, the things you do, the things you post, the things you experience.

everyday should be a day to have fun and how to genuinely have the most fun.. everything became so performative or easily masked, when in the end it’s all about what makes you the most joyous, the most giddy, the most happy.. and one by one it feels like i’m cracking a code..

to follow your highest excitement, to just have the most fun, the more fun, the more abundance.. to train my brain to constantly look for what is more fun & to fill my life with it. WOW

whether that be visualizing, planning, moodboarding, or going out on a walk, planning a photoshoot, making music, it genuinely should be from a place of having fun.. and if not we should try to remind ourselves that thats the point on why we are here.

to experience the human life, and to have fun on this infinite timeline.. at times it seems hard, but once you truly commit to the fun but of it & simply allow yourself to ease into the fun-ness of life, it allows things to unfold. that is my goal for this year, to have the most fun. for that is where the authenticity lives.

hi everyone i am a 20 year old musician,

i've been surrounded by music, went to art school for middle + high as a vocal student, but recently have come to the realization that i had relied on my ear to come this far. i do top lines as well as make my own music, but have the habit of creating melodies on top of tracks/beats my producers would make from the references i gave them.

i have a specific ear when it comes to music in terms of my taste or what i like in each song, and want to be able to put things into my own hands. starting by learning the piano and guitar again but from a music theory & songwriting standpoint.

was curious what would be the best way to embed myself in all things music theory and for me to truly internalize what i am playing and singing.

i am starting by playing my favorite songs i want to master such as elliot smith everything means nothing to me or fiona apple waltz better than fine,

1. note names + treble/bass clef muscle memory
2. chords/progressions and scales
3. guitar and building chords
4. songwriting on guitar + piano a dull structure of songwriting
5. learning to produce to create my own demos + songs

what would your advice be for a practice routine or how you've each found it to be best to understand this and use it throughout all mediums? i've been surrounded by music, my mom being a piano teacher, and having former lessons when i was younger so i believe i would pick it up quick if i knew how to organize it in my brain..

what is your advice? i love jazz, shoegaze, electronic and folk music, all for their different purposes and would love to be able to create and songwrite in my own hands. thank you all, i'm happy to be on this journey but also incredibly frustrating at times realizing there is so much to do and daunting at the thought that i am only on the tip of the iceberg.

i am very visual/use symbolism to help a lot

going through music theory its helped me to think of chords as different colors/parallel universes/different friend groups, even astrology of musica universalis, etc.. what would be the best way to learn with a more neurodivergent/storytelling mind? thank you again!

just please word vomit to me everything that i would/should need to learn to be able to play + write anything i would want to create into music, and i can try to learn each step one by one~ haha, sounds very ambitious, but i am willing to put in the work especially at this point in my life

any apps or practice techniques/tips, anything is appreciated!

hi everyone, i am currently in south korea and cannot purchase the sheet music for waltz better than fine. i really wanted to learn & practice it on the piano, would there be anyone who has a pdf or could send it to me by any chance? or if there's another way to purchase it would gladly appreciate, thank you so much!

where to go when you feel like you’ve hit a wall. i know manifestation is key, but how do i let go of the past and the things right in front of me? the uncertainty, the numbness, the unhealed trauma. the world is so crazy, everytime i go in social media even more.. but on top of that being in the music industry and being a public figure is too much to handle at this point. jealousy & insecurities, eating at me like it never has. what is the point of it all when the only thing that can help me continue is myself..? this way sound like i am complaining, which i am and i admit.. but how can we grow stronger and how can we let go of these emotions.. what is the end to this pain? all the pain in the world, why do we have to suffer? everyone pretends otherwise but how do you gain that true happiness within again? yet again, i am 20, maybe i am young.. but i feel like ive seen it all, but know im not even at the tip of the iceberg. what are ways to pick yourself back up, to let go of reality and allow myself to cleanse & heal spiritually?

maybe it’s real.. maybe it’s limmerance.. first love? why do i feel this way and is it even true? where to go when you feel like you’ve hit a wall. i know manifestation is key, but how do i let go of the past and the things right in front of me? the uncertainty, the numbness, the unhealed trauma. the world is so crazy, everytime i go in social media even more.. but on top of that being in the music industry and being a public figure is too much to handle at this point. jealousy & insecurities, eating at me like it never has. what is the point of it all when the only thing that can help me continue is myself..? this way sound like i am complaining, which i am and i admit.. but how can we grow stronger and how can we let go of these emotions.. what is the end to this pain? all the pain in the world, why do we have to suffer? everyone pretends otherwise but how do you gain that true happiness within again? yet again, i am 20, maybe i am young.. but i feel like ive seen it all, but know im not even at the tip of the iceberg. what are ways to pick yourself back up, to let go of reality and allow myself to cleanse & heal spiritually?

it’s all about authenticity,
to know who you are
and to be completely aware of where/who you’ve been
not necessarily to be grounded in the reality that nothing can change, but accepting that you are who you are

being a 20 year old girl in the music/entertainment industry, what i’ve learned—
to truly listen to others first
my perception might be naive or young now, but through spirituality & the knowledge i’ve gained
true authentic confidence comes from within.

knowing who you are
and reminding yourself to remember who we truly all are..
souls having a human experience
and our mission is to shine our most authentic highest timeline light to others.. no matter if they think we’re delusional or dumb or naive

to be humble & grateful & authentic, ego may occupy at times, but truth will always lead. always tell your truth in your art. for there is no absolute truth except for energy— art is a direct vessel for that authenticity.

nature vs nurture,
we can’t escape the reality we’ve lived, but we can accept & grow
to manifest is to understand + allow ourselves to timeline jump
but in order to leap, we must accept
in order to grow, we must allow changes to be seen & apparent.

and being “ourselves”, to be a good human, to genuinely treat others as you would want them to treat you.. the golden rule, and being grateful. and positive outlooks, realizing manifestation is possible, that everything & anything can be a manifestation on our ends.

it all starts from belief.
and to allow ourselves to even believe in something delusional to our current reality is the first step of breaking out of the current cycle looped.

but to find that truth & authenticity within. i am learning that again, after years of masking and people pleasing.

i am finally coming back to myself and re-learning who i am and who i was. from childhood, to each era ive gone through, to dictate & differentiate : taste from identity.

letting go of how ive been programmed or subconsciously programmed myself to act or react. but to see what is truly authentic within me, and what that means for me in society.

in a time like this, the most radical thing we can do is to be ourselves, to be kind and to be a light to such dark times. it may feel hard, and it can be hard at times.. but light will always shine in a dark place. and i truly believe all will be seen soon..

how do you feel & any advice on what it means to be truly authentic in this world? spiritual & not—as an artist especially in such a trend-based, fast-paced industry. what are tips or advice you can give to a young 20 year old navigating this life?

🤍 love to all

it’s all about authenticity,
to know who you are
and to be completely aware of where/who you’ve been
not necessarily to be grounded in the reality that nothing can change, but accepting that you are who you are

being a 20 year old girl in the music/entertainment industry, what i’ve learned—
to truly listen to others first
my perception might be naive or young now, but through spirituality & the knowledge i’ve gained
true authentic confidence comes from within.

knowing who you are
and reminding yourself to remember who we truly all are..
souls having a human experience
and our mission is to shine our most authentic highest timeline light to others.. no matter if they think we’re delusional or dumb or naive

to be humble & grateful & authentic, ego may occupy at times, but truth will always lead. always tell your truth in your art. for there is no absolute truth except for energy— art is a direct vessel for that authenticity.

nature vs nurture,
we can’t escape the reality we’ve lived, but we can accept & grow
to manifest is to understand + allow ourselves to timeline jump
but in order to leap, we must accept
in order to grow, we must allow changes to be seen & apparent.

and being “ourselves”, to be a good human, to genuinely treat others as you would want them to treat you.. the golden rule, and being grateful. and positive outlooks, realizing manifestation is possible, that everything & anything can be a manifestation on our ends.

it all starts from belief.
and to allow ourselves to even believe in something delusional to our current reality is the first step of breaking out of the current cycle looped.

but to find that truth & authenticity within. i am learning that again, after years of masking and people pleasing.

i am finally coming back to myself and re-learning who i am and who i was. from childhood, to each era ive gone through, to dictate & differentiate : taste from identity.

letting go of how ive been programmed or subconsciously programmed myself to act or react. but to see what is truly authentic within me, and what that means for me in society.

in a time like this, the most radical thing we can do is to be ourselves, to be kind and to be a light to such dark times. it may feel hard, and it can be hard at times.. but light will always shine in a dark place. and i truly believe all will be seen soon..

how do you feel & any advice on what it means to be truly authentic in this world? spiritual & not—as an artist especially in such a trend-based, fast-paced industry. what are tips or advice you can give to a young 20 year old navigating this life?

🤍 love to all

it’s all about authenticity,
to know who you are
and to be completely aware of where/who you’ve been
not necessarily to be grounded in the reality that nothing can change, but accepting that you are who you are

being a 20 year old girl in the music/entertainment industry, what i’ve learned—
to truly listen to others first
my perception might be naive or young now, but through spirituality & the knowledge i’ve gained
true authentic confidence comes from within.

knowing who you are
and reminding yourself to remember who we truly all are..
souls having a human experience
and our mission is to shine our most authentic highest timeline light to others.. no matter if they think we’re delusional or dumb or naive

to be humble & grateful & authentic, ego may occupy at times, but truth will always lead. always tell your truth in your art. for there is no absolute truth except for energy— art is a direct vessel for that authenticity.

nature vs nurture,
we can’t escape the reality we’ve lived, but we can accept & grow
to manifest is to understand + allow ourselves to timeline jump
but in order to leap, we must accept
in order to grow, we must allow changes to be seen & apparent.

and being “ourselves”, to be a good human, to genuinely treat others as you would want them to treat you.. the golden rule, and being grateful. and positive outlooks, realizing manifestation is possible, that everything & anything can be a manifestation on our ends.

it all starts from belief.
and to allow ourselves to even believe in something delusional to our current reality is the first step of breaking out of the current cycle looped.

but to find that truth & authenticity within. i am learning that again, after years of masking and people pleasing.

i am finally coming back to myself and re-learning who i am and who i was. from childhood, to each era ive gone through, to dictate & differentiate : taste from identity.

letting go of how ive been programmed or subconsciously programmed myself to act or react. but to see what is truly authentic within me, and what that means for me in society.

in a time like this, the most radical thing we can do is to be ourselves, to be kind and to be a light to such dark times. it may feel hard, and it can be hard at times.. but light will always shine in a dark place. and i truly believe all will be seen soon..

how do you feel & any advice on what it means to be truly authentic in this world? spiritual & not—as an artist especially in such a trend-based, fast-paced industry. what are tips or advice you can give to a young 20 year old navigating this life?

🤍 love to all

recently i had an opportunity to go to los angeles, i am an artist and do music so i was staying and creating music at a home studio.

i am a 20 year old girl, and was surrounded by men 4-7 years older than me for the entire month.

learning and trying to be as friendly but as “cool” as possible, (looking back there was a lot of unhealed wounds/ego creeping in conversations) but also trying to do my best in the power dynamics that are “la creatives”

i’ve been learning & trying to embody what true divine femininity means or what true authenticity means for a while now.. manifesting my life & all the things that have come in.

but to the point of all this prefacing, i encountered a soul that i truly thought i connected to.. i felt safe, i felt heard, and i completely attached immediately. showing my true authentic but also very repressed self, it was very competitive at first (us both doing music and having very strong opinions/knowledge) , but was ultimately in awe every time we’d create such beautiful art together..

we’d smoke & do other drugs, but everyday i felt so free and so alive.. maybe it was a coping mechanism of escapism.. but things have shifted after coming back home and away from them

learning that they didn’t truly care for me all this time, and feeling very used.. i had been too naive & young, indulgent & impulsive..

and after lots of learning i can come to the point realizing it was either a narcissist or a fake twin flame.

i’ve never understood or thought a true twin flame could come into my life, but this just showed something greater and more important to learn.

to always put yourself first, i was giving away my energy, my love, letting go of all of my boundaries simply because i thought it was fate..
my heart was getting too ahead of itself and somehow convinced my headstrong brian in the process..

i am letting go of my energy, but through this experience i have learned so much and wanted to document and share with you all..

i am a very spiritual person and always have been, but for a while i was so lost and brought into such a worldly way of thinking—
thoughts i’ve formed as a young woman working in a creative field
but also how to communicate/be spiritual in a world of ego & brokenness.. learning a lot, but also forming clarity day by day

we’re always learning!
and we’re always living!
lots to digress, lots to interpret, lots to learn .. <3

what do you all think & what are some advice you could give with what is possible i have felt etc? i’m not sure, feeling quite lost but also at the brink of something greater ..

recently i had an opportunity to go to los angeles, i am an artist and do music so i was staying and creating music at a home studio.

i am a 20 year old girl, and was surrounded by men 4-7 years older than me for the entire month.

learning and trying to be as friendly but as “cool” as possible, (looking back there was a lot of unhealed wounds/ego creeping in conversations) but also trying to do my best in the power dynamics that are “la creatives”

i’ve been learning & trying to embody what true divine femininity means or what true authenticity means for a while now.. manifesting my life & all the things that have come in.

but to the point of all this prefacing, i encountered a soul that i truly thought i connected to.. i felt safe, i felt heard, and i completely attached immediately. showing my true authentic but also very repressed self, it was very competitive at first (us both doing music and having very strong opinions/knowledge) , but was ultimately in awe every time we’d create such beautiful art together..

we’d smoke & do other drugs, but everyday i felt so free and so alive.. maybe it was a coping mechanism of escapism.. but things have shifted after coming back home and away from them

learning that they didn’t truly care for me all this time, and feeling very used.. i had been too naive & young, indulgent & impulsive..

and after lots of learning i can come to the point realizing it was either a narcissist or a fake twin flame.

i’ve never understood or thought a true twin flame could come into my life, but this just showed something greater and more important to learn.

to always put yourself first, i was giving away my energy, my love, letting go of all of my boundaries simply because i thought it was fate..
my heart was getting too ahead of itself and somehow convinced my headstrong brian in the process..

i am letting go of my energy, but through this experience i have learned so much and wanted to document and share with you all..

i am a very spiritual person and always have been, but for a while i was so lost and brought into such a worldly way of thinking—
thoughts i’ve formed as a young woman working in a creative field
but also how to communicate/be spiritual in a world of ego & brokenness.. learning a lot, but also forming clarity day by day

we’re always learning!
and we’re always living!
lots to digress, lots to interpret, lots to learn .. <3

what do you all think & what are some advice you could give with what is possible i have felt etc? i’m not sure, feeling quite lost but also at the brink of something greater ..

I went through a lot.. and all to the conclusion that the answer is always love & light. That that is my truth and my authenticity. Felt so defeated when someone said that dark and evil will always Trump the goodness, and it made my heart crack a little. Only to realize that my truth and purpose is to spread love and light energetically, through my life and my art. And to tell the truth. For others aren’t fools but are simply naive, but for someone who knows the secret and are hiding it is the true villain.. And in any way that I can remember this for myself in a world that tries to trick us into believing otherwise, how can I always remember that love & light has infinite definitions. Not only in just happiness and rainbows, but in the dark, the confused, the weary, all of it can still have the truth of love & light.. To hold that within but also not be tempted or confused by others’ thoughts or emotions?

How can I not be offended when others do not hear my truth? How can I stay unbiased and hold that space out of true love & light? How do I not have an ego when I encounter others that think otherwise?

i'm grateful & curious
i'm grateful for the knowledge i've learned, and curious of how it will manifest.
music is the only thing in my life now. do it until you can barely take it.
you can always you know what yourself or get married to someone wealthy. there's always another option. this too shall pass

(these were the thoughts i wrote down when i was spiraling.. shows how limitled our ego can be.. how much lack and insecurity.. when we are the creators and have limitless possibilities. i pray i will understand how deserving i am, and to allow myself to TRUST in the universe)

i cry at the thought that my family would sacrifice themselves for me but i wouldn't for them..
when will i learn to love when i can sacrifice myself?
am i capable of it?

this world is brutal, but thats why we must help heal.. universe please guide me as a soul & artist. that’s the only purpose left for me here. may i find love and abundance. i pray.

to tell the truth and be honest with you universe. to know exactly what it is i desire. what i am grateful for and what i am curious about. to never let anyone dim my light and my whimsy. i still have the light in my eyes for i am a pure soul.

let it be EASY
you are meant for an EASY life
have fun! enjoy the journey!
love life because i love to live

heal & regulate nervous system
know you are deserving

i just turned 20 and have been on a spiritual journey/opened my eyes to all of
this since covid age 14.

please tell me it gets better, that life is worth living! because i know it in my heart i just need to convince & remind my mind everyday.

i read back at my reddit posts and am shocked to see i have even written these things, 

for my memory is completely fogged.

another thing, 

do you lose your memory when you awaken?

i can barely tell you what i did last week, 

or anything else for that matter

and i recently turned twenty.. i’ve lived this way for so long 

my memory is horrible, but that’s why i live so completely in the present 

also—traveling feels like jumping/switching realities or portals 

has anyone had similar experiences?

what do you think memory is?

and does everyone have good/bad memory?

life feels so nice, so easy, almost too easy in a way 

and all i can acknowledge and reaiize, is that i have brought myself here

through all the turmoils, the days of questioning, the tears of existentialism, 

i can say, i genuinely love this life, and am curious for more

and to allow myself to be curiouser & curiouser!

we must give ourselves grace, but also the permission to be in awe of this life!!

people around my life may feel pessimistic, kindness seen s weakness

but that is the only thing that keeps us going

the living light within us, the living light at the end of the tunnel

the light you can be for yourself and for someone else’s life.

we are all broken, accumulated with dirt debt within us

but at the end of the day chop wood, carry water

we are on this earth full of magic and unlimited potential 

i allow myself to revel!

i allow myself to question & wonder!

to explore & experience

i sometimes, and most times may not understand the full scope of it

if i’m in psychosis or if i’m truly enlightened

if the government and capitalism is a man made structure

or if i have to tap back into reality and just hustle to make more money 

but the more i think, the more i learn, the more i live

there is much more to life then to just work to live to die 

i am heavily privileged that i can be in this state 

but also must acknowledge that i have manifested my life until now

to give credit and gratitude for myself, 

and to dream on & create more experiences i desire to live 

to co-create with life and the universe is a beautiful thing 

is for connection. connection to our souls. connections to other souls.

relationships + connections within life. 

the more i live, the more i realize, it depends on what you desire to connect with 

what do you want to create?

who do you want to become?

and you connect to that vibration, that essence, that being, that soul

and you connect to that version of you now. 

for when you be, when you are, you become, 

realizing how connected everything is will be the most mind boggling to understand 

that everything is here and now at a fingertip’s reach

what is blocking you?

what is the lack?

remember who you are, who you’ve become, and who you will become

remember who you are,

and get clear on what you desire

life is on creative mode!

connect + create!