While going through the CSE undergraduate curriculum, I noticed that there doesn’t seem to be a programming course in the first semester. Is this correct?
So will there be any need to learn a programming language before coming to college??
For context, I have a brother who is six years older than me. Today, my parents were casually discussing properties and finances with both of us. During the conversation, they said that no matter how much I earn or whatever property I buy for them in the future, it would never truly be “theirs” to enjoy because I am a girl and, after marriage, my husband might not allow it.
Before anyone jumps to conclusions, my parents are not particularly old-school. In fact, coming from a middle-class family, they worked incredibly hard to give both me and my brother the best opportunities possible. They treated us equally throughout our lives and, if I’m being honest, they probably spoiled me a little more. They sacrificed a lot to send us to the best schools, and thankfully both of us understood those sacrifices and worked hard enough to get into tier-1 colleges. My brother graduated with a great package, and I am likely to earn something similar as well.
For as long as I can remember, one of my biggest motivations has been to make my parents happy and give them the life they deserve. Not by sacrificing my own happiness I genuinely enjoyed studying and working towards my goals but because I wanted to be able to give back to the people who gave me everything.
So when they said that, I felt a sudden shock.
It wasn’t because they thought I wouldn’t want to take care of them. It was because the assumption was that some future husband a stranger I haven’t even met yet would somehow have the authority to decide whether I can do something for my own parents.
That’s the part I can’t stop thinking about
Do they really expect that from me? Do they think I would let someone else decide whether I can support the people who raised me? The idea that my ability to care for my parents would depend on someone’s permission feels so foreign to me.
What surprised me even more is that these are the same parents I always considered progressive. They believed in my education, encouraged my ambitions, and never made me feel less capable than my brother. Yet that one comment made me realize that even people who support their daughters wholeheartedly can still carry assumptions about what marriage means for a woman.
Maybe they were speaking from fear or from what they’ve seen happen around them. But it still left me wondering why it is so normal to assume that a daughter’s commitment to her parents becomes conditional after marriage.