u/lilou135

I'm sick rn (probably the flu, seeing a doctor tomorrow). Body symptoms often trigger my anxiety and the last days it was really bad. I was lying in bed and couldn't eat and for a moment I considered calling my mother who I haven't been in contact with for 4 years. But then I remembered how she is and that she wouldn't take care of me but probably be another burden. She would probably make it about herself and how worried she is about me right now which would lead to me taking care of her and downplaying my symptoms or getting more anxious.

I don't know where I am going with this post I just wanted to vent. I wish I had a mother who could take care of me when I need her.