u/minahaldn

I have popped my prev post up before I get into this one.

Relationship/IVF advice

I honestly don’t know if I’m being completely unreasonable here and I need some outside perspective because I’m currently sitting in my living room crying my eyes out.

Today I was in the bathroom when someone rang our doorbell four times. I shouted for my husband four times, rang his phone twice and got no response. I eventually found out he was upstairs in the bedroom watching YouTube.

I got really angry and shouted at him because this happened last week too except last week he actually locked me out of the house. He thinks that situation was funny, and today I was already frustrated because I felt like I was being ignored when I was trying to get his attention.

Instead of apologising, he became quite defensive and started saying things like my voice is “white noise” to him because I talk all the time. He also said I was holding back anger, pointed out that I was twitching, and started talking about me having anger-management issues.

Then he said, “Is that how you’re going to shout at a child? Is that how you’re going to treat your child?”

That really broke me.

I’ve been going through IVF and it’s already emotionally and physically overwhelming. I’ve genuinely been having doubts about whether I can cope with becoming a mum, whether I’ll be a good mum, whether I’ll love my child properly and whether I’ll somehow mess them up. I’ve actually thought about these things before this argument.
Now I feel like what he said has completely confirmed all of my worst fears about myself. I’m sitting here thinking maybe I shouldn’t have a child at all and that maybe I should cancel IVF.

I do feel like I was justified in being angry because this wasn’t some random argument, it was something that had happened before and I felt ignored and dismissed. But I also recognise that I shouted and screamed, and I’m not saying that was necessarily the best way to handle it.

What hurts most is that I feel like I do SO much for him and his family. I genuinely try so hard. And I feel like I don’t have much of a support system of my own. My relationship with my family is awful and my best friend and I stopped speaking about a month ago, so tonight I just feel completely alone.

I’m not even sure what I’m asking anymore. I think I just need some outside perspective because I’m questioning myself, my relationship, and whether I should even continue with IVF.

He is always just a happy chalant chill guy, treat him like a child so evidently tell him off like a child.

Was I completely out of line for shouting, or has he taken this way too far by turning one argument into a judgement about my personality and ability to be a mother?

We’re finally in our first IVF cycle after waiting years for this. I’ve started my medication and I should be feeling excited that we’re finally here, but instead I feel completely overwhelmed and honestly questioning whether we should even be doing this.

I know IVF is stressful in itself. There are medications, appointments, scans, hormones, waiting, anxiety and just the emotional weight of everything. I’ve waited so long for this, and I know how much this means to us, but I’m struggling more than I expected.

I also work in probation, so my job can be quite stressful and emotionally demanding. My husband has recently started a new job where he works 6am–3pm, and honestly, he clearly seems to be struggling with the hours. I don’t understand why he keeps picking up overtime when he’s already exhausted. I feel like instead of taking some pressure off, we’re both constantly running on empty (you wouldn’t think we had a holiday a few weeks ago!).

Then yesterday happened.

My husband accidentally locked me out of the house for three hours while he was asleep inside. I was outside from around 9pm until midnight, ringing the bell, banging on doors and windows and calling him over and over again. He was completely asleep and didn’t hear anything.
I eventually snapped at him when he woke up. He was really upset and crying, and I felt awful, so I consoled him and made him coffee before he went to work. But I barely slept afterwards and I’ve woken up today feeling completely drained, stressed and like my head is full.

I know it sounds like such a stupid everyday thing compared to IVF, but I think it was just the final straw. I already feel like I have so much on my plate and I don’t have much left in me for additional stress.

On top of everything, I feel like I don’t really have any friends left. I feel incredibly lonely. Things have also felt really strange with my husband’s family recently. I used to feel quite close to his sisters, but their demeanour towards me has changed a lot. He’s the only married sibling, and his youngest sister has recently been liking reels about things along the lines of a sibling getting married and their partner being “boring” and not wanting to hang out anymore because of said partner. Maybe I’m reading too much into it, but when you’re already feeling vulnerable, things like that really get to you.

I just feel like I’ve lost a lot of the people around me at the exact time when I need support the most.

And now I can’t stop thinking, maybe this just isn’t meant for us.

We’ve waited years for this. I’ve finally started the medication and we’re actually doing it, but instead of feeling hopeful, I feel exhausted and scared and like I don’t know if I can keep putting myself through everything.

I know logically that yesterday has nothing to do with whether IVF will work. I know one horrible weekend doesn’t mean anything. I know my husband’s tiredness, my job, family stuff and feeling lonely aren’t signs that IVF isn’t meant for us.

But emotionally, it doesn’t feel that simple right now.
I feel so overwhelmed and honestly quite depressed. I just want a break from everything. I don’t want to have to be strong or keep pushing through another stressful thing.
I think I just need to hear from people who have been through IVF, did anyone else have moments during their first cycle where they genuinely thought, I don’t know if I can do this anymore?

Did it get better once you got further into the cycle? How did you cope when everything outside of IVF was already feeling like too much?

I don’t think I want to give up. I think I’m just exhausted from having to keep fighting for things I desperately want.

Hey everyone!

I’ve been a Phan since I was super young, but I’ve always been more of an observer/lurker in the fandom rather than someone who actively interacts. This might genuinely be my last chance to see Dan and Phil before life gets busier and I end up with a child and all the grown-up responsibilities that come with it 😭.

So, I wanted to ask: what have your experiences been like meeting Dan and Phil? I’d love to hear any stories, advice, or what to expect!

Also, is anyone else attending the Manchester show (either day)? I’m going solo and don’t actually know anyone IRL who likes or even knows who Dan and Phil are. I was thinking it could be nice to make a group chat or Discord for anyone going alone or just wanting to make some new Phan friends before the event!

Let me know if you’d be interested 🫶

Hi everyone,
I recently picked up a second-hand DJI Osmo Pocket 1 because I’m on a budget. I’ll mainly be using it for holiday vlogs, family videos, days out, and general memories rather than professional content.
The camera came with:
The Osmo Pocket itself
Original hard case
USB adapters
Original charger
Original box

I’ve been doing some research and keep seeing people recommend various accessories but all for the 3&4’s, so I’d love to know what you think are actually worth buying and what would just be a waste of money for my type of use.
I’ve also seen a lot of discussion about:
ND filters – are they worth getting?
Best video settings for indoor and outdoor filming
Any must-have accessories for travel and family vlogging
I have noticed some people buy silicone cases and covers, but I think I’ll probably stick with the original hard case and keep it in a separate pouch/bag when travelling, so I’m not too concerned about extra protection unless there’s something I’m overlooking.
If you own or have owned an Osmo Pocket 1, what accessories would you recommend, what settings do you use, and is there anything you wish you’d known when you first got it?

Guys, am I being stupid or did Jasmine used to be part of a girl YouTube group where they used to do fashion makeovers and all of this other stuff with another girl called Angel but I can’t remember what the other two girls were called?

Hi everyone,
I’m hoping to have my embryo transfer this summer and I’m currently putting together an IVF journal to help me stay organised (and sane!) throughout the process.
I know that ultimately embryo quality, uterine conditions, and a lot of luck are what matter most, but I’d love to hear about all the little rituals, habits, superstitions, routines, or comfort measures you did around transfer and during the two-week wait that made you feel positive and helped you through it.
I’m talking about things like:
Eating specific foods (McDonald’s fries, pineapple core, pomegranate juice, etc.)
Warm socks 🍟🧦
Acupuncture
Daily walks
Meditation or affirmations
Transfer day traditions
Things you did before transfer to prepare your body
Anything you genuinely feel helped contribute to a successful pregnancy and live birth
I’m not looking for medical advice or guarantees—just interested in hearing the little things that became part of your story and helped you feel like you were giving yourself the best possible chance.
As someone who loves planning, I’m collecting ideas for my journal and would love to hear what worked (or even what didn’t!).
Wishing everyone here success, wherever you are in your IVF journey. 🤍✨
Bonus question: If you could go back and give yourself one piece of advice before transfer day, what would it be?

Hi everyone,
I’m hoping to have my embryo transfer this summer and I’m currently putting together an IVF journal to help me stay organised (and sane!) throughout the process.
I know that ultimately embryo quality, uterine conditions, and a lot of luck are what matter most, but I’d love to hear about all the little rituals, habits, superstitions, routines, or comfort measures you did around transfer and during the two-week wait that made you feel positive and helped you through it.
I’m talking about things like:
Eating specific foods (McDonald’s fries, pineapple core, pomegranate juice, etc.)
Warm socks 🍟🧦
Acupuncture
Daily walks
Meditation or affirmations
Transfer day traditions
Things you did before transfer to prepare your body
Anything you genuinely feel helped contribute to a successful pregnancy and live birth
I’m not looking for medical advice or guarantees—just interested in hearing the little things that became part of your story and helped you feel like you were giving yourself the best possible chance.
As someone who loves planning, I’m collecting ideas for my journal and would love to hear what worked (or even what didn’t!).
Wishing everyone here success, wherever you are in your IVF journey. 🤍✨
Bonus question: If you could go back and give yourself one piece of advice before transfer day, what would it be?

I don’t really have many people around me who truly understand what IVF is like. We’ve chosen to keep things quite private because I don’t want the pressure or expectations from other people constantly asking if we’re pregnant yet.

I’m also younger (25) than a lot of people who seem to go through IVF, which honestly doesn’t bother me, but sometimes it can feel a bit isolating. I also feel like there’s still a stigma around IVF and people assuming it’s always the woman’s “issue,” when that’s obviously not always the case.

We’re currently on the waiting list and hoping to start around August. I’m from up north in the UK and would genuinely love to connect with other girls who are going through something similar whether you’re waiting to start, already in treatment, or just understand the emotional side of it all.

Would just be nice to have some friends who get it 🤍

I don’t really have many people around me who truly understand what IVF is like. We’ve chosen to keep things quite private because I don’t want the pressure or expectations from other people constantly asking if we’re pregnant yet.

I’m also younger (25) than a lot of people who seem to go through IVF, which honestly doesn’t bother me, but sometimes it can feel a bit isolating. I also feel like there’s still a stigma around IVF and people assuming it’s always the woman’s “issue,” when that’s obviously not always the case.

We’re currently on the waiting list and hoping to start around August. I’m from up north in the UK and would genuinely love to connect with other girls who are going through something similar whether you’re waiting to start, already in treatment, or just understand the emotional side of it all.

Would just be nice to have some friends who get it 🤍