u/miseenen

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/02619288.1995.9974849

DOI: https://doi.org/10.1080/02690055.2020.1721143

Just felt I think the third one for today in Chiba. This one was a long one, too. Anyone else feel it, or any of the other ones earlier?

Sorry, long post. Two situations have been really getting to me over the past few days. To preface this, I may be having a stronger emotional reaction than I otherwise might because I’m nearing the end of a study abroad program in a country where I’m just about conversational in the language, and the whole thing has been pretty rough and intense for me. At the same time, this guilt is a problem that follows me around everywhere, it seems… just maybe not usually this painfully.

Situation 1: this is the more recent of the situations. The other day (Friday?) I was walking home with a friend from class. I was stressed out about upcoming finals and this one particular class had a paper 1000 words minimum more than the two other papers I have to write, which was frustrating me. My friend really has a bone to pick with this particular professor so she was just ragging on him and I was going along with it because I was frustrated, contributing a few of my own things. But thinking back on it, this professor has literally never been anything but kind and accommodating to me. I asked for an extension on the paper which he immediately granted, today I was a few minutes late to class and he asked if I was feeling better after being sick last week. So after class, I just walked home feeling like absolute garbage, the worst person on earth. It’s very rare for me to dislike a professor anyway and I’m a good student so they usually like me too. It hit me again just now and it’s just a sinking pit in my stomach, I feel so bad for shit talking this professor even though I know it’s never actually going to affect him in any way because he’d never know in the first place, and even though I was mostly just agreeing with my friend and going “really?? that’s crazy work” etc. I just feel so so bad for having done it.

Situation 2: This one happened at the beginning of this week. I was tired and running on little sleep. I wanted to go home and get some work done for my finals. I had a long day of classes and then after all that we had to attend a thing for the program which was another 2 hours or so. Then, after that was a celebration dinner. My friend (same one as above, actually) begged me to just go home with her instead of attending the dinner. Honestly the dinner didn’t sound appealing and it would have been a few more hours of being tired in a noisy restaurant, but I would’ve made it. It’s not the only celebration though, there will be another one later. I thought they saw me leave with her but apparently they did not because I got a text from a classmate and one of the program directors (who is just absolutely the sweetest person ever) asking where I was. I said I was going home and the director just said ok get home safe, my classmate said that she gave me a shoutout in the speech she prepared and I felt so bad I almost turned right back around. My friend convinced me not to and the train arrived before I could really decide to turn back. I would’ve gone to the dinner had I known… I don’t want to make things awkward for others. I didn’t lie when I told my classmate I was buried in work, though I just ended up resting when I got home. I just spent that evening wallowing in guilt basically. I still feel a little bad even though I don’t think it was really a big deal. I’d already agreed to help write a speech for the other celebration too (actually maybe that’s what the shoutout was for? just occurred to me).

Anyways, I don’t know if I really needed to write all that but even thinking about it now I feel like I can’t accurately judge the severity of my offenses. I used to be a complete recluse so all of this people stuff is somewhat new, but the professor incident reminded me of a dream I had in third grade that gave me a similar sense of crushing guilt. What am I supposed to do about this feeling? I haven’t hurt anyone, so there’s nothing to make amends for (I apologized plenty about the dinner anyway). I would also hate to burden my friends again after I couldn’t resist venting about the first dinner thing because I felt so guilty. I feel soft and squishy and malleable.

I’m a study abroad student who has been here for about 2 months, so all my devices are from the US if that matters. I use Sakura Mobile, monthly plan. This mostly happens on my phone, whether I’m on wifi or cellular doesn’t seem to make a difference that I’ve noticed. It doesn’t happen nearly as often on my computer, but when it does it seems to usually be when I’m on school wifi. I’m not using a VPN and this has never been an issue for me before, but right now it’s a little obnoxious because I can’t access google scholar lol. Does this happen to anyone else? Does anyone know why it happens or how to fix it?

I just went to the local drugstore to pick up some shampoo and conditioner but when I got home I realized I bought the wrong type. I haven’t opened or touched them yet and I have the receipt. Is it possible for me to exchange them or do I just have to live with my mistake? I speak enough Japanese to navigate familiar situations smoothly but this is unfamiliar and will be difficult, which is why I don’t necessarily want to just go in and ask. If I have to I will, but I’ve also heard that returns/exchanges aren’t really a thing here so if it would be better for me to spare myself the embarrassment then I’ll just eat the cost and go back tomorrow to buy the right ones.

Edit: I also used a coupon when I bought them if that matters

Update: I was able to exchange them without a problem! The coupon was even re-applied. The Japanese aspect was also not actually as complicated as I thought it would be, it was a very simple conversation (though it may have been more complicated if I couldn’t exchange it lol)

I’ve been curious about this for a while. In Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure, I often hear the characters clearly say じゃあない, lengthening the a sound. In part 4 at least it feels like they say it like that pretty much every time, but I don’t think I’ve ever heard it like that outside of anime and googling doesn’t really lead me anywhere. Is that a thing irl?

Apologies if this falls too much into the realm of homework help. I’m a college junior who is hoping to write a thesis next spring for my bachelor’s degree, and I’m trying to get ahead of my reading a little bit. As for the topic of my thesis the only thing I know is who I want to write it about. I have a general sense of the works I should focus on, but I need to read a lot of them still. I should have until the end of the year but I’m a slow reader.

On that note, is there anything specific I should be, like… doing? When I read? Should I be taking notes? Should I just read without thinking too hard about it? I want to prepare myself as best as I can because I know it’s going to be difficult no matter what. I just have absolutely no idea what I’m doing or anything about the process of writing a huge graduation thesis.

So I’ve really been working on my stp game and I think I’m getting there. However, when I’m wearing sweats or anything with an elastic waistband, I have to lower the pants to like almost below my cheeks or else my stp isn’t pointing down enough. Underwear fully up, because I use the dick hole on them. How low is too low??? (lighthearted post, it’s just something I’ve been wondering about— with my shy bladder I don’t know if I’ll even be able to use the urinal at all haha?

I am writing an email thanking my professor for responding to my other email answering a question I had. I have “分かりました。ありがとうございます！” written, but gmail put the red squiggly and suggested よろしくお願いします instead. I’m usually inclined to trust google’s suggestions, but even then it’s usually a blue line. Why is arigatou wrong here?

I’m looking for a book to buy as a gift to one of my professors back in the States but it genuinely seems like you just can’t buy it anywhere. The book is 女面 (Masks in English) by 円地文子. Every single site I’ve checked says “out of stock sorry you can’t order this one” and in the rare instance it seems to be available to purchase it’s a limited print edition selling for like ¥15000. Unfortunately I fear that my language and resource knowledge can’t get me any further than the first page of Google and checking the websites of some bookstores around me (it’s also not available to purchase using ehon). Is there anything else I’m not seeing? I saw it on the publisher’s website as well but if there was an option to purchase the physical book (not ebook) I didnt see it.