u/mochi-and-plants

I’m a staff UX researcher and I’m tired for a lot of the same reasons people post on here.

I love design (in a past life I did design stuff, just not UX design). I’m trying to pivot into Service or UX Design or to at least have that be part of the work I do.

For folks who went from doing exclusively UX research and now do, or are, Service or UX Designers, how did you do it?

Did you take any classes? Did you have a design mentor at work? Did your work allow you to shadow designers/take on design work? And what sort of challenges did you face? What advice would you give to someone pivoting?

I’m a senior researcher. I am under increasing pressure to do more in less time, as many of us all are. I have been able to use AI in some areas (first draft of emails, planning docs, etc. One area that I am finding the hardest to do faster is data analysis/synthesis. I tried AI and it had even a hard time doing some basic organizing of some data and the analysis was too surface level.

That said, I feel like there’s something there that I’m missing. I use it to extract quotes, but other than that I do manual coding and analysis. And it’s frustrating when I have a bunch of different datasets (notes and synthesis in Miro, notes from interviews, transcripts from other interviews, etc) and need to turnaround quickly into the next steps (report, ideation, prototype).

We have Claude account at work but that’s it. How is everyone else speeding up their process, specifically the data analysis /synthesis stage?

Also, I’m a parent with two kids under 3. I just came back from maternity leave and I am running on limited sleep, energy, and bandwidth. I feel like my brain is kind of mush these days. So I am kind of looking to see how AI can lift some tasks off my plate, if any.

I don’t know if I hate work or if I hate working in general. I am not motivated to work, thinking about work stresses me out.

Just venting. I am in my 40s. Just had my second child last year. I know of two people who retired at 40. RETIRED. I am dreaming about retirment. Because I started a family later in life, I feel like when I am going to retire that’s when my kids will be older and moving away / moving on. I want to be with them now while they are so dependent on us.

I am just sad and bitter. Having two has been a big shift for me. It’s been hard to juggle two kids and working full time. I am both the happiest I’ve ever been (we struggled to have kids for about a decade), but also the most tired and worn out I’ e ever been.

I also had a late start in work life so financially I feel like I can’t just not work for a few years. I only recently started to feel financially stable. I feel like both my family and career have much more positive outlooks than I ever imagined, I also am struggling to balance it all. I feel like I am not doing a good job at work and wanting to spend all my time and energy with my kids and parents. And I’m starting to feel resentful that I do have to work so much right now and sacrificing time with my kids. But giving up a job right now, in this economy, is not a good idea. We live in a HCOL and without my income we will not be able to stay afloat.

Uuuugggghhhhhh. Just venting. Thanks for listening.

My family (spouse and two young kids ) are thinking of moving to south Martinez/Pacheco, Pleasant Hill area because of the diversity and schools. And we work in north bay so looking for a place that is not too far south so our commute isn’t too long.

I don’t want to live too close to the refinery in Martinez. But going further south, there is an airport and a golf course. I was looking at the shadowood neighborhood of pleasant hill and pacheco (west side of pacheco blvd). Those areas seem more affordable while still having access to good school, and pretty close to freeways so the commute wouldn’t be terrible. However, they are both close to an airport and golf course, both things that are known to cause health problems.

Anyone live in either area that can talk about their experience living there, how you deal with air quality, and if it’s worth it to live there or if we should consider other areas. Our budget is about $1M.

I work full time. Sr level.

Work is really busy and I am stressed. It’s getting busier and I feel like more is being added to my plate. I’m not alone. It’s just a very busy time. And I keep getting pushed to travel to places across the US. It’s hard to do with 2 kids and I’m breastfeeding.

I got an interview with a FAANG for a contract job (i worked there before in an adjacent department and it was okay). The job is also remote. It pays $50k more. I live in a HCOL area and have two kids in childcare. So, $50k would help us a lot.

But there’s no upward mobility, it’s contract. I’m in my early 40s, switched from academia to private in my late 30s, so I feel like I should be thinking about stability and moving up. But I’m an older mom and all I can think about is how much time and energy am spending away from my kids.

I feel like contract will be less stressful in that I won’t have to deal with the org wide stuff, I won’t have to travel (maybe to the office on occasion).

I just came back from parental leave a few months ago so I might be just reacting to coming back to work after being on leave. I might just need more time to adjust to being back at work. Changing jobs to a contract role during the current economic times seems like a bad idea. But I am so miserable working that I feel like I might as well be paid more?

I genuinely like using AI for my work. It has helped me in ways that I didn’t expect and has served well as a brainstorming buddy. For context, I am a staff level researcher. I switched from academia to tech during the pandemic.

While I am very excited, motivated, and encouraged to use AI - I feel torn because of the ethical concerns. Like, all the data centers that are popping up and destroying not just the environment but the communities neighboring the centers. Or how the more I use it, the more I feel it is taking away from junior / entry level folks to learn and grow. Or how AI will be used to push to do and produce more.

I genuinely like it though. My good friend is an AI scientist and she was the one that turned me to the cool things it can do and she has been using it for some social/environmental good projects. But I guess I just don’t feel good about using AI.

How do you all feel about AI? And how do you grapple with the feelings and knowledge of the negative impacts of AI?

My son has a milk and dairy allergy. His dairy allergy is not as sensitive (as in if a product has a small amount of milk he might have a tiny rash, but otherwise okay). His egg allergy is quite severe. It even affected him when he was breastfeeding and I was eating egg.

He was so fussy and had eczema as a baby. Then when we started solids (around 6months) he immediately broke out in hives. We avoided eggs, talked to an allergist, got tests done and confirmed his egg allergy (dairy too).

At 2 we tried the baked egg challenge. He ate 1/8 of the muffin and started coughing within minutes so we stopped. Doctor said to avoid eggs completely until next year when we will try egg challenge again.

My son is from a donor egg but the donor did not list having any allergies. My husband does not have any allergies so my hope is that my son will grow out of it.

I have completely avoided eggs but part of me wonders if it’s helpful to introduce eggs in micro amounts. Ii ask because while I am careful the rest of our household eats eggs and I want my son to be able to mange an accidental ingestion of a small amount of egg (like if we used a knife and it had a trace of mayo on it). I wouldn’t give him a whole egg, I just want to make sure he is okay if there’s small amounts he ingests.

He is so sensitive that at his daycare when he was a year or so he touched a table where a child had eaten some egg product. The table had been wiped clean but there was probably a trace amount. He broke out in hives and was screaming. This happened a few times (not with the table but a child who ate eggs and had some on his clothes and was running around with a kid). So then anyone that played with my son had to change their shirts and my son had a designated high chair for eating.

He has not had any incident like that in a year. I don’t know if its because he’s getting less sensitive or if its because there are no eggs around him (which I doubt).

I have a 6 month old who doesn’t seem to have an egg allergy. So I think we will make some foods with egg in them. While I will be careful, I know my daughter may have some residual egg on her at times so I want to make sure that my son will be fine around her.

My son’z allergist kind of scared me about microdosing and told me scary stories kids and allergic reactions.

We know several people with kids who have egg allergies but they were all mild and have grown out of it. No one has had an allergy as sensitive as my son so I don’t know how to interpret some of those papers that just say “egg allergy” because it doesn’t mention degree of sensitivity.

Anyone have any experience or papers that indicate the severity/sensitivity of egg allergy and microdosing?

Edit: thanks all for the comments. Having read all your comments, I realized I was not of sound mind when I considered this. 4 hours of commuting a day for a contract job … oof, that’s not good for anyone.

Work is so stressful and busy I barely even have a chance to use the bathroom or drink water, my baby hasn’t been pooping, I feel so tired but also so socially starved. I guess this is just motherhood, haha.

Going to stick out in this job till I can find something better that is full time and remote. In the meantime going to try to put more boundaries at work and maybe get some cake or something.

Thanks all for keeping me grounded.

———

I have a full time remote job (amazing, I know). But with a little one that is starting daycare soon and one already in daycare and everything getting more expensive we are feeling the financial pressure increasing each day. I have a good paying job but live in a HCOL so honestly the money just doesn’t go far.

We have two kids, 6 months and 2. Monthly daycare will be over $5k. It’s so disgusting how much daycare is. And I don’t blame the daycare, they are wonderful and amazing. I feel like this country (USA) should do more to support childcare costs. And the fact that daycare teachers and staff get paid so little despite childcare costs also feels criminal.

We pay so much in childcare I wonder sometimes why I’m working. Like, I’m working so that my entire paycheck goes to daycare so I can have the privilege to work?

With daycare costs and inflation it’s too much. We are getting by but with rising costs I feel like I need a new job. We are also looking to move for a place that has better schools, but the cities that have even okay schools (not the best) are still way out of our price range. Or, if we could make it work but we would be house poor and miserable.

So now I’m considering jobs that are hybrid contract because of the pay. There’s one job I applied for that would require me to be in the office 3 days a week and it’s about a 2 hour drive away (one way). It would not just be better pay but the type of work and the company would I think set me up for a better position in the future financially and career-wise.

I can’t believe I have to consider leaving a full time remote job because of daycare costs and inflation. There are other reasons why I would change jobs but money is the biggest reason.

Ugh, sorry, I just need to vent. I have family in Canada that had a year of subsidized parental leave. And here I am about to leave my 6 month old in daycare and considering jobs that require me to drive 4 hours a day to pay money for other people to look after her. It is messing with my mind.

I am a senior researcher feeling stuck at my current job. It’s a full time remote job which is amazing. The pay is okay. The work life balance is currently not great and I feel like whenever I try new methods or try something new it is pushed aside. I work for a medium size company that is like many others, trying to use AI in new ways but is having a hard time figuring out what that looks like. There’s lot of pressure to show impact and there is a coworker I’m working with that I don’t really jive with.

I got a call from a recruiting agency that had a FAANG contract role on a really cool technology team that I think I’m well positioned for. It pays $60k more than what I’m making now. But it’s hybrid. It says it’s 3 days a week in the office and the office is about 2 hours away.

I have two kids (both in daycare).

$60k would be huge for us. With two kids in daycare and inflation, we can be more comfortable. Also, we want to move (we want to move to a place with better schools but HCOL).

For those in FAANG companies how strict is your RTO policy? I contracted at a FAANG a couple years ago and when they asked for people to RTO my manager was also remote and he said he would not ask any team member to go into the office. Also I learned so much there - I don’t feel like I’m learning as much where I am.

Also, is $60k worth leaving a full time remote job? It would be about a 2 hour drive one way. I think I would try to reduce it down to 2 days and get there early and come home early to avoid traffic (of use some public transportation part of the way to work while commuting).

Just wanted to share that I love this show so so much. I feel like the writing, acting, casting, storylines are so good. Sure, it’s unrealistic at times, but the core of I feel like it’s grounded in real people and their stories tied with timely issues.

I miss the show and wish new episodes were on today.

For any show writers and actors who stumble on this post, you are amazing and I hope that you’re doing well.