u/mothiposa

Hiii I’m 17F and I’m going on my first ever date next Tuesday. The guy and me met on snap he’s very sweet, funny, says the right things, etc + he’s soooooo cute. We’ve FaceTimed every day and text 24/7. We’re gonna have our first ever date at the mall and I’m freaking out. I’m now about 150lbs but I used to be 230 at my highest (I struggled bad with BED). Now I have like flabby arms and my thighs look weird and my knees look a little indented. I’m scared he’s going to think I look fat or gross or disgusting. He also told me not to bring money but I’ll genuinely feel bad if he buys me stuff like I’m obv gonna bring money but what if he doesn’t let me buy stuff and he buys it for me? My aunt said that’s sweet but I’ll feel so guilty cause I don’t deserve that. He also said he wants to hug and hold my hand which is fine but he also brought up kissing and I’m fine with it but how? He said you just like press ur lips out but I thought you use tongue? And what if he asks me to be his gf? I really wanna say yes but I’m just so so so scared I won’t be good at being one. Please help any tips or advice on anything would be appreciated

Ok so I’m F17. I’ve been friends with this girl (let’s call her G) since I was in 6th grade, I’m currently going into my senior year. We’ve always been very close. In 8th grade this girl (S) came along. G and S got very close and I wasn’t as close to G anymore. Me and G had our first fight when me and her were in a group project with me, her, and our other friend. She never did any of the work and the day it was due we got into an argument and she went to S and I had said something at the time like “go to her like u always do” (cringe ik i was 13). Anyways another instance was when I invited G and K to go to an amusement park together. G said she couldn’t because she already had plans with her other friend NOT S. I said okay and went with just K. Me and K ran into G who was with S when she said her plans were not with S. S,G, and I were all in a friend group for majority of 8th grade btw. And the entirety of 8th grade, S had been bodyshaming me behind my back to G and G didn’t tell me until almost a year after. Yes I was overweight but I had lots of problems at home along with struggling a lot with eating (very bad BED). But I am doing better and I’m a healthy weight range and take care of myself now! Anyways to my face, S had told me to starve myself, that I was morbidly obese, that no one would ever date me because I was so fat. G never did anything. S also said the n-word to impress a guy she was dating (she is white and so was her bf). G never said or had a problem with any of this. Summer going into freshman year, we dropped S because long story short she tried to claim we bullied her and get us expelled (no proof and we didn’t get expelled lol). But she even sent a LEGAL letter to G and her parents saying something that if G ever talked about S again that S could sue G. G’s parents had to get a lawyer and pay a lot of money but the whole thing was resolved. Come freshman year me and G are closer than ever. And dumbass S told me to kms IN THE HALLWAY like 2nd day of school. But during junior year, G started hanging out with S again out of NOWHERE. So I distanced myself because I didn’t want to be around a person like her and S caused me so much anxiety with how I look and eating and stuff and so much stress for G AND her parents with the legal stuff and she took her back like that? And we both agreed to keep the peace with S but G PROMISED me she would never be friends with her again. She broke that promise and I’m the bad guy? G also used me (I think). My aunt whom I’m very close with would drive us around, bring us places, and buy us things. G’s family is middle class and my family is more like lower but I would NEVER hang with a friend with INTENTION of buying something and expect an adult to buy me stuff that’s not necessities. Like my aunt bought her clothes, jewelry, perfume, etc. And it did bother my aunt (she told me this) but she’s kind and felt obligated and I feel like G took advantage of this. For one of G’s birthdays, I got her some like body stuff, her favorite candies, and a gift card she requested. She then commented that I “only” gave her $35. In front of everyone mind you. She also has a perfectly fine house and has probably only had me over maybe 3-4 times where I’ve had her over at least 50+ and I used to get screamed at for it (which she knew) because I have 3 little sisters and she’s an only child. Maybe this is all stupid and little stuff but I genuinely feel miserable and used. I feel like I wasted so much time trying to be her best friend to never receive anything back and I have no one anymore. Am I in the wrong?

Ok so I’m F17. I’ve been friends with this girl (let’s call her G) since I was in 6th grade, I’m currently going into my senior year. We’ve always been very close. In 8th grade this girl (S) came along. G and S got very close and I wasn’t as close to G anymore. Me and G had our first fight when me and her were in a group project with me, her, and our other friend. She never did any of the work and the day it was due we got into an argument and she went to S and I had said something at the time like “go to her like u always do” (cringe ik i was 13). Anyways another instance was when I invited G and K to go to an amusement park together. G said she couldn’t because she already had plans with her other friend NOT S. I said okay and went with just K. Me and K ran into G who was with S when she said her plans were not with S. S,G, and I were all in a friend group for majority of 8th grade btw. And the entirety of 8th grade, S had been bodyshaming me behind my back to G and G didn’t tell me until almost a year after. Yes I was overweight but I had lots of problems at home along with struggling a lot with eating (very bad BED). But I am doing better and I’m a healthy weight range and take care of myself now! Anyways to my face, S had told me to starve myself, that I was morbidly obese, that no one would ever date me because I was so fat. G never did anything. S also said the n-word to impress a guy she was dating (she is white and so was her bf). G never said or had a problem with any of this. Summer going into freshman year, we dropped S because long story short she tried to claim we bullied her and get us expelled (no proof and we didn’t get expelled lol). But she even sent a LEGAL letter to G and her parents saying something that if G ever talked about S again that S could sue G. G’s parents had to get a lawyer and pay a lot of money but the whole thing was resolved. Come freshman year me and G are closer than ever. And dumbass S told me to kms IN THE HALLWAY like 2nd day of school. But during junior year, G started hanging out with S again out of NOWHERE. So I distanced myself because I didn’t want to be around a person like her and S caused me so much anxiety with how I look and eating and stuff and so much stress for G AND her parents with the legal stuff and she took her back like that? And we both agreed to keep the peace with S but G PROMISED me she would never be friends with her again. She broke that promise and I’m the bad guy? G also used me (I think). My aunt whom I’m very close with would drive us around, bring us places, and buy us things. G’s family is middle class and my family is more like lower but I would NEVER hang with a friend with INTENTION of buying something and expect an adult to buy me stuff that’s not necessities. Like my aunt bought her clothes, jewelry, perfume, etc. And it did bother my aunt (she told me this) but she’s kind and felt obligated and I feel like G took advantage of this. For one of G’s birthdays, I got her some like body stuff, her favorite candies, and a gift card she requested. She then commented that I “only” gave her $35. In front of everyone mind you. She also has a perfectly fine house and has probably only had me over maybe 3-4 times where I’ve had her over at least 50+ and I used to get screamed at for it (which she knew) because I have 3 little sisters and she’s an only child. Maybe this is all stupid and little stuff but I genuinely feel miserable and used. I feel like I wasted so much time trying to be her best friend to never receive anything back and I have no one anymore. Am I in the wrong?

Hi I’m F17. Since I was 13-14 I’ve felt just horrible. Like one moment I can be out with my friends having fun but the second I’m alone all my bad thoughts come back like every “good” thing is like a bandaid and that empty feeling I feel always comes back (if that makes any sense). Ever since I was 10 I’ve binge ate but within the past year, I’ve lost around 60lbs from purging. And last year I struggled with SH but I was able to stop (I haven’t in months). My mom says that she’s worried that I may have an ED or that I’m depressed and I never deny either but she doesn’t do anything about it. I went to my school psychologist and opened up like a LOT like I even cried and shit. She said she would check up on me throughout the year and never did. And lately it’s all gotten so much worse. I can’t sleep, I’m having thoughts of killing every single day (I would never do that because I’m scared it wouldn’t work), I feel exhausted even when I do get sleep. I don’t know what to do it’s all getting so much worse and I have a rocky relationship with my mom, my dad isn’t around, my stepdad is an idiot, and I’m not in school so no one there can help, my friends suck. I just don’t want to feel this way but I don’t know how to get help or if I even need help. Is this all normal?