u/naboss1

My girlfriend really likes Chinese cuisine particularly and I know she is roughly into most asian cuisines whether korean, japanese or chinese. Ive done some research and came up with a few restaurants in Brisbane i think might be appropriate. I want it to be more than just nice food, I want it to be an all encompassing experience so if anyone has experience in these places, I'd love to know your thoughts.

Restaurants:

- Donna Chang

- Suum

- Black hide caxton st

- Exhibition

- Yoko Dining

- Joy

I know its a weird mix, since some of these are way more expensive than others, but the main point is i wanna hear anecdotes as sometimes just looking at the menu doesnt tell the whole picture. I appreciate any responses!

>subclass 500 expires at the end of August and course marks/course completion is on july 3rd, Is it risky to travel to NZ from july 11 to 18? (im not from NZ)
by u/naboss1 in AusVisa

I posted above about my willingness to travel overseas after my course has completed but while my student visa is still valid. I called the department of home affairs and asked them directly and they said that my visa is valid until when it is valid, it cant be cancelled or i cant be denied entry while my visa is still valid. This directly contradicts what people on this subreddit say. It wasn't even a risk in the eyes of the department of home affairs, they gave me a direct answer that there was no risk.

Lost my gym bro recently, hmu if you wanna hit the gym together some time, I live inner city north. Shoot me a DM if you’re interested

My subclass 500 visa expires on 30th august, and my final course marks release on 3rd July which is when i will get my course completion letter. My graduation is on the 31st July but i planned on going for a trip before the graduation and also before applying for the 485 visa. Is this too big of a risk?

I do have a time frame of roughly 1 weeks between marks being released and me possible flying. But i feel its a bit rushed to try to get everything sorted and apply in the span of a week, but if it significantly lowers my risk then im willing to do it. I have seen other posts and responses are quite mixed in terms of whether its risky or not. If anyone has gone through this personally then i would love to hear your story.

My girlfriend is an extremely hyper-independent person. When we're physically together, things are honestly amazing. We spend almost every day together, she's affectionate, communicative, loving, and I feel completely secure. But whenever we're apart, especially for longer periods of time, it's almost like she forgets I exist sometimes. Communication drops off significantly, updates become sparse, and I feel very disconnected from her.

For me, little things like good morning/goodnight texts, occasional updates, and generally feeling involved in my partner's life are really important. They make me feel considered and let me know that my partner is thinking about me throughout their day. I don't need constant updates every hour, but I do need some level of communication and reassurance.

I've communicated this multiple times throughout the relationship, probably four or five times at this point. My girlfriend has told me that she doesn't naturally like giving frequent updates because it makes her feel like she's being watched or monitored, which I understand. However, I told her that feeling involved and connected is something I genuinely need from a relationship, and she said she was willing to provide that.

The issue is that she has consistently failed to meet that need. We're currently apart for about three weeks, and before she left I made it very clear that I would need that level of communication while we were apart. She agreed, but it's still been lacking.

When I don't get much communication or reassurance, I sometimes spiral and overthink. My girlfriend hates when I do this, which I understand. But when I explain that the lack of communication is often what triggers it, she says she's trying her best. I believe her, but what she gives is still nowhere near what I need despite me being very clear about it.

Another layer of context is that during the first few months of our relationship, she was extremely affectionate and communicated pretty well even when we weren't together. I will admit that we're in a shaky period right now. For the last month to month and a half, we've been fighting every few days, and we're definitely not as good as we were a few months ago.

Even so, I still show up for her as though nothing has changed because I believe the hard times are when you prove to your partner that you'll continue to love and care for them despite the difficulties. But lately it feels like she's unconsciously checked out or at least stopped putting in the same effort she used to.

So I guess my questions are:

• At what point does this stop being an anxiety issue and start becoming a compatibility issue?
• Is it unreasonable to want to feel involved in your partner's life and know they're thinking about you throughout the day?
• Has anyone been in a relationship with a very hyper-independent person where communication needs were drastically different, and did it ever get better?

The first four months were honestly great. She was extremely affectionate, always wanted me around, and would constantly tell me how comforting I was and how much emotional security I gave her.

This is where things started to change, and I realised it far too late.

I basically made her the focal point of my life. I stopped doing a lot of the things that gave my life purpose and made my entire world revolve around her, providing for her and making sure she was comfortable.

I think I was giving so much of myself to her, at my own expense, that eventually I started feeling like she wasn’t giving me the same amount back. I formed a lot of resentment because I felt like I was putting in more than I was receiving.

Because of that resentment, I unconsciously started treating her differently. We fought a lot, almost every day for two or three weeks. She would tell me that I wasn’t as emotionally understanding, patient, or comforting as I used to be.

At first, I blamed her. I thought she was treating me badly and that I couldn’t give her love because I didn’t feel loved myself.

Eventually, she started becoming more distant, and that distance made my anxiety go into overdrive. I’ve always been somewhat anxiously attached, but it had never really shown up in this relationship because she always gave me reassurance and clarity.

When she started stepping back, I became very anxious and started spiralling, which in turn seemed to push her away even more.

We’re still together, and she’s still affectionate to a degree, so I don’t think the relationship is completely doomed. But she’s definitely not as affectionate or forthcoming as she used to be. She used to be incredibly expressive about how much she loved me.
She still says she loves me, but I can tell she’s not quite as enthusiastic or open with her emotions because she doesn’t feel as safe as she once did.

My question is: is there any coming back from this?
I’m willing to put in the work because I think she’s worth fighting for. I just want to know whether I’m fighting a losing battle, whether I need to adjust my expectations, or whether there’s still hope, not necessarily of going back to how things were at the beginning, but at least of salvaging the relationship and stopping this cycle of resentment.

So myself and my girlfriend banter alot, its the basis of how we communicate. As of now we're a relatively new couple, about 5 months in. If im being honest from a personality stand point Im a pretty reserved and calm person and shes very extroverted and social, I knew that before we got together she had alot of guys "chasing" her. This context matters because the banter im eluding to in the title is when she says things like "oh if you dont wanna do that, Ill get my 10 other guys to do it" or "oh ill just ask [insert name] to do it then". She is obviously joking as i can tell by her tone but i cant help but think theres some truth to it because i know she gets approached alot. Ive brought it up with her in a more casual capacity saying that i dont like it and her reply is always "well im with you arent i" or "well im in your house and chose you didnt i". While it does comfort me slightly, it still gets to me knowing one small mistake i make, and she might actually put those words into action because there really is a bunch of guys waiting to sweep her away.

I just wanna know if this is partly my own insecurity playing up and making this a bigger problem than it really is because i dont wanna make a mountain out of a mole hill. But then again i do want to set certain boundaries because its a shit feeling every time and I dont wanna feel this way.