u/oaklicious

Olá tudo,

Sou Estado-unidense e amanhã chego a Belo Horizonte pra visitar um par de semanas. Eu danço salsa e bachata e foi várias vezes a dances de forró em Buenos Aires, então gostaria sair a dançar aqui em Belo Horizonte.

Alguns locais que me podem recomendar pra isso?

Desculpe se é pergunta tonta, mais os lugares de forró são como de salsa onde é normal que um homem convida mulheres desconhecidas pra dançar?

Meu Portuguese é nível intermédio, gosto de sair a dançar como jeito de conectar com pessoas locais quando viajou.

In my early career I was really excited to be “part of the action” and I worked very hard as a contractor’s field engineer until I eventually got into Commissioning and 8 years in became the commissioning manager for several large (~$200M) water plants. It was exciting, I learned a ton, made giant piles of money and completely burned myself out.

I’m now coming back to the work force after a couple years abroad and I do not give a shit at all about the career excitement I had early on. I still care about doing a good job, but I am over busting my ass and working nights and weekends. I kinda don’t mind being a paper pusher if I’m working a clear 40hr week and not constantly stressed out.

I’m being engaged to work as an owner’s agent on commissioning projects for a large municipality. I was curious to hear from those of you who have done this role if you liked it and how was the experience?

FWIW this is actually a small consulting firm that works as the owners rep for various city agencies. I wouldn’t be a municipal employee.

I’m a year in to dancing Bachata with an advanced Salsa background. I would say I’m a solid pre-intermediate bachata dancer currently working up through the intermediate stuff.

Lately I’ve really focused on bachata and gone from standard moderna stuff to more creative variations on shadow position, mirrored basic, and the Madrid step, as well as more advanced sensual moves.

I’m a bit of a disaster these days at socials as I move away from my comfort zone. I’m not entirely confident in everything I’m trying out, so timing is suffering and I’m getting more awkward looks when things don’t go well. On top of that, I don’t have confident enough command of what I’m leading to properly gauge a follow’s level and adjust accordingly.

It’s a bit rough. I am not discouraged at all; I think this is just part of the process, and on the whole people in my scene are pretty nice and accepting of my antics. I’d say I’m having 50/50 great dances and real disasters.

Am I in “intermediate hell” then? Is there going to be an “advanced hell” later? Is it all just hell?

I see a lot of traveler posts here understandably frustrated when locals respond only in English, even when you’re trying to practice Spanish with them. As a non-native C1 speaker it can feel discouraging when you work so hard to speak this language only to be responded to in English.

I have been living and traveling in several LatAm countries for several years now and have essentially two categories of local friends: one half are truly desperate people who work shitty ass jobs with little mobility. The other half are typically remote workers with American or European companies who have disposable income to travel and enjoy their lives.

The former group do not speak English, and the latter group enjoy their career mobility specifically because they speak fluent English. Latin American people are almost as a rule kind and inviting, but live with economic instability and often labor rights that would be shocking to people in the global north. English capability can be a “golden ticket” for many of them.

Remember if you are visiting somewhere in Latin America if somebody isn’t helping you practice your Spanish, try having a chat with them to understand if they want to improve their English or if they’re just trying to be polite. You can really contribute to these people’s lives and help them by practicing with them!

I’m dating in my 30s and have found it really helpful to define what are the characteristics in a partner that are *most* important to me. Things like independence or sexual compatibility, without which I just don’t think I’ll be able to develop a lasting romantic connection.

Discussing this topic with friends I’ve come to a far more challenging question I wanted to ask the general populace- what are (potentially negative) characteristics of a partner that you could learn to live with and negotiate on? These could be general vibes or really specific things.

It’s easy to imagine all the positive things we desire in an ideal partner but chances are we ourselves have many negative characteristics we would hope our lovers can see past. What do you think you can learn to live with?