u/popopotatoes160

My gf and I opened our relationship relatively recently (I'm bi) and eventually after some waffling I decided to try grindr, since I've been craving some M/M connection. I live about 40mi outside a good sized Midwest city so my grid is a real mixed bag. I'm mostly interested in t4t because I'm not even a year on T yet and don't really pass as anything in particular, a cis person could much more easily accidentally say or do something to cause dysphoria. I'm not affected by w/e shit ppl say in my inbox, it's more irl words and actions I'm concerned about. Which is good bc my inbox is full of... well the kinds of guys you find on grinder out in the sticks.

So I've messaged several trans guys throughout the week (and several nb people, and a couple cis guys that caught my eye), I'm not very good at coming up with what to say first outside of asking them what's up, unless they've got anything in their bio for me to latch onto. Regardless, I've gotten several messages into a few chats, and even though in two cases we did manage to pivot to the kinds of stuff we're into and whatnot, it did eventually fizzle. For one we had things in common, but he hasn't replied, the other he asked me and hasn't replied. I'm not into anything too crazy I swear 😅... there's a couple more chats that just kind of fizzled before getting to that point, but they were guys that indicated they didn't want to really go sexual fast. Each of these guys has been online since.

One guy mentioned a place he wanted to go in his bio, after chatting for a little while and vibing I asked him if he'd want to go sometime. He did not respond to that message, but said something else, I kept replying, having good conversation. He's adding me on another platform, so that's good, but I'm a bit confused still about his deal lol. I'm just as happy to make new friends as I am to hook up or whatever but bro does have me a little confused 🙃

Does anyone have insight or tips on how to make this... work? I'm not near any bars or places queer people gather and can't drive at night. Not to mention I'm so introverted those places are often too much for me. So meeting people from online would theoretically be great for me, I just can't seem to make it happen.

I'm a chronic overthinker and usually a more direct and physical person in matters of romance and sex. I've been actively trying to keep all this to like a couple hours at night while also gaming so I don't overthink it or let it impact my daily life, but I think my subconscious has been chewing on this in the background cause CLEARLY I've got a lot of thoughts. So any advice or even just commiserating would be great ❤️

There is a public park near me with a mixed population of a few wild ducks and many feral domestics. They frequently suffer from angel wing, and local animal control isn't willing or able to do anything. There is a local population of coyotes so the crippled ducks often don't last long. For the native wild ducks, rehabbers are an option, but no one is caring for the others. The parks department seemed disinterested in putting up a sign about not feeding bread. Is there anything I can feed them that acts like a supplement to prevent angel wing?

Edit: I live in the southern Midwest USA for context