u/sapphicbrown

I saw someone post this underneath one of my posts about Eloise and they are so right. I’ve noticed the people who have an issue with her character and her feminism are all western women who live in first world countries and have a lot of privileges.

Not everyone who hates her is western but I think her character resonates more with people from a non-western background.

I’m an American but I was born and raised entrenched and indoctrinated in South Asian culture. The marriage mart is VERY similar to the arranged marriage system we have in our culture. It’s super similar and as woman we are groomed and prepared our entire lives for marriage and children. The whole community gets involved too and gossips about the guy, the dowry, the wedding itself. The wedding itself is multiple days and considered a huge event. Families go broke spending money on these weddings too. What people think matters a lot in our culture. It’s why honor killings are a thing in South Asian countries. Families care too much about their societal standing.

I relate so much to Eloise cause my days and nights are spent fighting my family against marriage as well . It’s an every day battle and one that will never end. It’s why I find Eloise harping on the same thing realistic. People say she has no character growth but as long as her mom is pressing her and no one is listening to her concerns about how women are oppressed her continuing to be mad and speak out is accurate. Her mom will never stop bothering her and as more of her family gets married she’s going to get pressured to settle down. I also resented a lot of the women in my culture who went along with the arachaic rituals of our culture too and looked down on them but it was hard not to when the women who are compliant are weaponized against you. My mom and others will use these women who eventually settle down and have kids as an example of the ideal life. It’s not their fault, but the fact that they don’t acknowledge how messed up the system is the problem. Once they are married it’s like nothing is wrong and our marriage culture isn’t toxic to them anymore so they don’t care.

It’s why I’m not mad when Eloise doesn’t want to talk about embroidery or floral patterns. She sees it as oppression and something women are indoctrinated into. These women won’t give her the same grace if the tables were turned. Feminism isn’t about supporting women’s choices. It’s a liberation movement about equality and many women back then upheld the patriarchy and didn’t do anything to deviate from it.

This is why I can’t take criticism of Eloise’ character seriously from people who don’t understand and are holding her to 2026 feminist standards. She’s not even a feminist tbh. She’s just a girl who is angry at the oppression she faces and has no outlet but to rage.

I’ve grown out of this mentality and I’m sure Eloise will too, but her feeling resentful of other women because they don’t see how messed up it is is accurate. As a desi, Eloise character is so relatable on so many levels . Tons of women in 2026 don’t have to deal with a marriage mart and are afforded the luxury of choice but I guarantee you if the arranged marriage culture were popular in America you guys would understand Eloise more. I’m raging 24/7 just like her.

I’m dreading her season because it seems like they are writing her disdain for marriage and her ideals about feminism as something she will grow out of and I’m not looking forward to it.

I see myself in her so much. Her getting annoyed with other women who just talk about marriage and traditional feminine activities is a realistic outlook of how radical young feminists feel at that age. I also felt the same way when I was Eloise’ age. I was annoyed at my fellow women for catering to the patriarchy and giving into the sexism of society instead of seeing it for what it was. I couldn’t understand how they were participating in a system that was meant to oppress them. Society is unfair and so many double standards exist and instead of challenging them a lot of women adapt or even uphold them. It’s not a bad thing, but it’s because of the loud obnoxious women who rebelled against this that we even have rights today. I did grow from this, but I thought I had solidarity with one of my friends until she herself got married to a guy who was the completely opposite of the feminist ideals she held. It’s why when she found out about Pen and Colin I related to how she felt.

It’s why I can understand why Eloise is so mad and upset all the time. SHE IS THE ONLY ONE on the entire show who sees how unfair society is and is the only one challenging the oppression placed upon women. Imagine being surrounded by people who talk about marriage all day long and nothing else. 99% of all the women gossip and talk about marriage or things related to marriage. I hate how the show portrays her in the wrong like she shouldn’t criticize and has all the characters surrounding her talk down to her and act like she’s crazy for not wanting to get married. Eloise has to be understanding of every woman on the show or else she’s not a feminist but none of the women have ever understood her or tried to see where she’s coming from. This is why she’s angry because she just can’t comprehend that other women don’t see the oppression.

Eloise is frustrated because she’s all alone in her beliefs and her constantly challenging societal norms is her trying to get the women to open their eyes about their own oppression but instead of challenging society, the women actively participate in the very traditions that oppress them.

Even all the hobbies that the women in the ton have are influenced by patriarchy and the marriage mart. Do they really want to sow and do embroidery or is that what was taught to them? Choice feminism is popular in 2026 but back then there was no choice. Women had to survive and were taught at a young age to do housework, how to crochet, knit etc.

Eloise’ view on marriage and her being the ONLY women in the ton to see through the facade and the patriarchal aspect of society is realistic and her being hostile and against “feminine” interests of other women is realistic tbh. I had the same thoughts.

I did grow out of it and I have more nuanced views but I relate so much to her. At her age my feminism was the same. I was angry because I was the ONLY one who saw how unfair my culture was.

It was an amazing scene and I’m glad that Robin coming out to Steve exists. The writers making Robin a lesbian is the best thing they have ever done. It was an amazing moment, well acted and still one of the highlights of season 3, but I hate that people use it as a gotcha to downplay the homophobia Will’s scene got.

“People had no issue with her scene” “her scene got no backlash”

As someone who was in the fandom back then, her scene got huge backlash as well. Steve/Robin had a huge fanbase and people were rooting for Steve to get the girl. All you have to do is search on the subreddit and you’ll find so many posts with tons of upvotes complaining about them making Robin a lesbian. There were tons of people who were mad and continued to be mad for months after it aired.

There are still fans who exist till this day who ship Steve/Robin and are mad they made her a lesbian.

There were so many reactors who were mad and saying that Robin led Steve on.

Acting like there was no homophobia or backlash towards her scene is disingenuous because there was.

Her episode wasn’t reviewbombed but it 100% got criticism.

This is not to say that Will’s coming out scene wasn’t flawed because it was. As a queer person myself I have a lot of issues with it. The problem is a lot of the legitimate criticism got drowned out by alt right MAGA grifters and homophobes. You had Fox News talking about it for weeks. Elon Musk tweeted about it. Alt right podcast bros were saying how stranger things has gone woke. It got review bombed by people who don’t even watch the show.

Maybe this is recency bias but David and Rachel have the best chemistry I’ve seen of any live action movie that has Clark and Lois, and yes that includes Margot Kidder and Christopher Reeve.

That kitchen scene between them was HOT and it felt like I was intruding.