Anxious attachment but aware?
I 26F started dating my boyfriend 26M 2 years ago. We moved in together last year. I have always been anxious, but I’ve noticed my relationship anxiety is through the ROOF lately. My biggest fears are what he thinks of me that he won’t tell me. That he loves his ex more than me. That I will lose him. That I’m not actually chosen but convenient to him. I lost my mom when I was 13. All of this to say I think I’m anxious attachment.
The worst part about this is he is the most amazing human being in the entire world. He has never once given me a reason to question whether he’s being faithful or question his love for me. So, I haven’t. I understand that these thoughts are anxiety ridden and not results of his actions. I know he loves me, and wouldn’t do anything to hurt me, but my anxiety won’t fully let me believe it. That said, the last thing I want to do is weigh him down with these feelings. I understand how exhausting being with an anxious attachment can be and he doesn’t deserve that. Any advice? It’s gotten to the point where I feel like I’ll never be able to be in a happy relationship. The thoughts are constant and they hurt. I am also specifically trigged by his exes. I don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t want to lose him and I really do want to better myself for him.