u/skeleton--steve

So me 26f broke up with my partner 30m

3 weeks ago

Ive regretted it since

Ive tried talk about it and he is avoidant about it

I dont know you hurt me

I dont know if i want you back

Which i did 0 denying that

But now his asked to sleep together

I want to because I want him close

I want to because I think itll open the connection

His always been very sex forward and emotions after

Most emotional connections with us happened after sex

Am I just hopeless if I do this

Im not sure what to do

Hoping someone's had a similar experience

I feel damned if I do damned if I dont

We broke up via text because i was stood up and i over reacted about it

Its complicated

So me 26f broke up with my partner 30m

3 weeks ago

Ive regretted it since

Ive tried talk about it and he is avoidant about it

I dont know you hurt me

Which i did 0 denying that

But now his asked to sleep together

I want to because I want him close

I want to because I think itll open the connection

His always been very sex forward and emotions after

Most emotional connections with us happened after sex

Am I just hopeless if I do this

Im not sure what to do

Hoping someone's had a similar experience

My birthday is coming my friends count the days

Its 10 days left

You havent planned anything they say

You always plan things

I try and smile it doesnt meet my eyes

I was supposed to be picking you up from the airport

Arms wrapped around you

Eyes full of love

A kiss we were both waiting for

That was my plan our plan

Ruined in a minute

I dont think im doing anything I tell them

I look at our text thread

6 weeks of scilence

You will not be in that airport

I will not be in the airport

But part of me wonders if I should still check

But I cant stand a second heartbreak if your not in that crowd ill fall apart

My address hasn't changed

Knock on my door

Please

Id open the door to you

Unsure on if i should reach back out to T

Was it bright but brief or will it come back

Or do I just let it go

Everything in me is telling me to just try but im so muddled in my own feelings I cant tell if I should or not

Dear T

The part that bothers me is the ending

You came on so strong

You met my passion

I was convinced you were my twin flame

The other half of me

Instead you chose to ghost

He who communicated so thoroughly

I know I shouldn't miss you

6 weeks is not long enough to bond so deeply

But i did

6 weeks of calls voice messages and laughter

Its funny how someone i knew for such a short time made me feel more than someone I knew for a decade

I worry about your mental health

I wonder if thats why you walked away without explaining

I think to message you as a stranger sometimes just to know that your okay

I know you worry you dont deserve all you want in life but you do your lifes been tough and I hope you continue working for it

In another life I would have gotten on the plane

I would have kissed you in the airport like a movie scene you asked for

Made you smile in a picture (a smile would have been good you're too serious) and left you stained in lipstick

I would have gotten to know you for a lifetime

I wouldn't be here confused wondering what I did wrong or why I wasnt good enough

In this one though

My number hasn't changed message me call me show up if you need me I am still here

I hope you get everything you want from this life

Your gonna make a good dad one day

I hope you make it

Yours sincerely that too kind overbearing girl

J