r/MissedInitials

I saw a message on here that felt aimed but, sometimes they all do. One lie? Many lies. Games played. Rumors spread. All I did was match your energy. If you have so much animosity toward me, feel free to text or call, I’d be willing to hash it out. It would be the first honest conversation I’ve had with you in a long time. I don’t want a fight. I just want the truth. Grow up huh? Funny coming from you. The childish games were laughable and even though you thought you were breaking me. I’m afraid that’s not possible.

If you don’t ever have the courage to tell me the truth, I’ll share mine. Please stop trying to lecture me about my health, both physically and mentally. I’m stronger than I’ve ever been in both departments. I would advise when you speak to your therapist you tell them the truth. That way you have a shot at healing things in yourself that would cause you to stop ruining the people who love you. Instead of all your emotional manipulation and head games.

I know you think you’ve gained something. I think you’ve lost so much. The only thing you’ve gained is false friendships and connections that are going to turn to ash and leave you with nothing. If you want evidence, look no further than me. I once considered them my best friends. I hope you have the strength to build yourself back up after it all crashes down. Trust me, you’re going to need it.

If you only knew how much better I am actually doing after stepping away from the mess that was my life just a few months ago. I’m not going to share too much because there is so much coming soon. I wouldn’t want to ruin it with negative wishes from you and your new “friends”. The reason I’m even mentioning this is because deep down inside I still care for you. I truly hope you heal and become the version of yourself I saw inside you. There are days I’m not sure if she was real. If she is, I hope you let her out. She is someone beautiful and admirable. She deserves the spotlight. Not whatever this creature is that keeps her shackled inside you.

Know that in order to find this man that I am now, I had to let go of that boy who was scared and didn’t feel like he was enough. The one who thought he deserved the treatment he was receiving. The truth is, neither of us was ready. I am now though. I know now what I stand for. I won’t ever lower myself to play in the mud that is the expectations of people I once called peers. I have my own goals now. I’m proud of who I am. I would rather be me than any of you. I don’t need you attention or approval. I have my own now. Goodbye.

I love you beautiful lady your my hole world your the one who i need and want in my life idk if you will see this or not but I really hope she does.

It doesn’t always have to be

Big and fancy,

Lavish or expensive.

It’s the simple things

I want to enjoy myself with you.

I want to run

in the rain with you

not because we seek shelter

but because we wanna

get drenched together.

I wanna hold your hands

As we walk, bare feet

Along the shores

Where the only voices

We hear that of the wind

And the waves.

I wanna stop and pick

The blooming wildflower

And stick it in your hair

While watching it enhances

Your beauty and paints

An unforgettable smile

On your glowing face.

I wanna go shopping

In the vegetable market

With you, as we select

The fruits and vegetables

To nourish our health.

I wanna cuddle with you

In the cool evening breeze

Under the comfort

Of a silver blanket of stars

That twinkles is just for you and me.

I wanna enjoy

The simple things with you.

Hello bb We can write together here if you agree💕

S,

I'm sorry. Sorry I fucked up our friendship because I couldn't be happy loving you quietly from a distance. The reality of losing you as a friend terrifies me, even more than knowing I can never call you mine. But when you kept talking down on yourself, it drove me wild, because all you saw in yourself was an older gal with baggage, while I saw the most Amazing woman in the world. And I know nothing could ever have happened between us, because you never saw me that way, and thats ok, but I just wanted you to know that, there was somebody who saw past the bullshit and trauma, and saw you, loved you, and wanted you to not feel lonely anymore. But now it seems, my confession and feelings have pushed you away, and I know, you have every right to walk away. You have every right to be angry. I don't blame you one bit. Just know that I will always love you, and want the best for you. Take care of yourself Kid.

J

Used to talk to someone whom I felt really connected with and felt she too had the same.. Concerned and used to like and care for a lot.. She was goin thru a lil tough time and feeling no one cares.. She used to like and appreciated the genuine care n concern shown. One day she just vanished without a word.

Hope you are well and someday happen to read this. Wherever u r jus be Happy. Hope to hear from u soon. Know that u r loved & cared for. You aren't alone.. Here for u always :)

I know that between us I have much more to be sorry for and I take full responsibility for my actions. I should've stepped back. I had a chance to stop you kissing me but I didn't. I didn't want to. I should've been braver, had more self-control. And I should've looked you in the eye when we went our separate ways. I should've been more gracious and used my words better. I know I tried to do right in the end but if I accidentally hurt you then , I'm so so sorry.

You made mistakes too, but you already know what they are. If I hadn't made it clear I forgave them ages ago. But sometimes I'm afraid that you're spiraling in your own mind. I hope that you've forgotten about me, that you're moving forward. A selfish part of me, the part that refuses to let go, hopes you'll reach out, and that you still care for me.

I hope that things are going well for you and that you meet someone new, someone better, and that when we meet again you are glad to see me, unaware of the pain that's sure to be inside me at that moment.

For the little that it's worth, I did love you....I still love you.

I hope you love yourself.

I'm trying and failing to love myself right now.

Take care,

Of acceptance.

Bam bam baaaaaaaaaahhmmm!

Yep.

Today , I not just acknowledge - but FULLY accept that everything about this connection..... And I mean EVERYTHING was all a delusion that I fed that remained only in my very messed up head.

With that - comes the awareness of that there are NO letters or poems or subliminal messages of love for me - and I am now aware of how totally unhinged that idea ever was to begin with 😅

This delusional - borderline psychotic time here was a fun and exciting - messed up ride that nearly sent me to a psych ward 😂😂😂

#noregrets(sorta)

I've enjoyed writing shit - so I think I might linger - but I am no longer looking - I ACCEPT PAST TEMPTATIONS THAT THERE IS NOTHING TO BE FOUND FOR ME however acknowledging that if I look hard enough, I will find messages in everything that align but NOT cos it's reality - but because of how real I WANT it to be ...in MY MIND ( that and reality are NOT the same thing)

Ok.

Well

Goodluck to me

And a reminder to all

- we are all victim to thee human condition.

Peace out lovers ✌🏽

Well it took 3+ years to finally purge out the toxic mess you left me with and to get my feelings right. and truth be told i really thought it was coming to the grave with me .But last night it changed I was writing a story (nic and sara) and it was like my inspiration was gone. The pool of confusion had dried up the love for you was different felt different not the i want you kind but the kind you get for a friend and that felt great .I did not hate you which is what i thought i would end up with. Now if i meet someone i can truly fall in love with them all the way . And my records clean i have no hate for any !!! D

The Hardest Part

Time stopped in an instant, the whole day standing still. Was it truly you I saw, or memory bent to will?

I pictured you smiling — or maybe it was hope, a stranger with your features my lonely eyes could cloak.

My chest stirred with a flutter, my thoughts unraveled free. Could it be the girl who still holds my heart in secrecy?

Probably not. Coincidences pass each day. It wasn’t you — even if I wished that way.

You’ve gone beyond us now, into a life anew. Still, the image brought me comfort, if only for a moment or two.

Because before love faded, before everything fell apart, we were friends first — heart to heart.

And maybe that’s the hardest part: not the dreams we couldn’t mend, but losing the quiet comfort of calling you my friend.

-can we still be friends?-

I don't know if youll ever see this im sure you go on here I know you do .no matter what is said or what happens were we go from here if we pass or live .I love you raw real over the top now then tomorrow in my heart in my soul in real life I love you .it sits in my chest like it's crushing me different things like you said if we only had a box at the river,, the memory's of it just beingyouandiand laughing and smiling,all thei loveyous I remember everybody of it .apart of that crushing pain is how our hole situation was impacted and affected by you sister and how oncethst stained the situation itwasheldhard and steadfast .youd happy now ,morenowthen you're then but your sister isn't there putting pressure on your relationship that I feel isufair . I don't think you acknolged I did my best.

I DID MY BEST AS LONG AS I COULD TO LOVE YOU THE BEST I COULD

Face I love you .

It's easier to be happy were you are with out responsibility or influences of people I want you to know you are my one that got away I will for ever regret k let you slip away.that I lost you that I pushed you away . I regret that you hate me but if UT makes you happy then hate me . Every one has hated me and I'm used to it .I did the best I could the best I new how and that's not enough for you or any one I'm used to that as well.but it's the best I can do .

I wish we could talk and I know we won't I know you won't. But I wish we could . I love you and I'll ways love Ed you and I will always have space for you inmy heart in life and in death because that's what I feel like. I'm not going to reach out and im going to try not to post about us .but just know that even if I'm not I still think of you every mourning and nite every time I'm sad and happy every time it's lonely on the road and thers only silence it's you I think about .

I did want to be your forever always bit I wasn't enough to be yours please stay safe and be happy this boat banker is n OK longer holding you back and your goin g to be someone amazing for your person .

Lonely roads soon ahead that will lead back to the unknown emotions of laying eyes on one another