Hello everyone, just asking for prayers for my mom. She has a biopsy procedure tomorrow for concerns for lymphoma. I’ve been crying so hard as I am attending school far from home, unable to be by her side.
My mind keeps on spiraling. She’s so young and I never imagined this. I want her to see me graduate, get married and have her first grandchild. She’s so frightened and I’m at a loss for what to do.
28F, M3, far away from home, single, 0 friends, landlord doesn’t allow pets, on the verge of crash out every second.
How do you guys do it?
Hi everyone. I apologize if this isn’t the right place to post this.
I know this question is also a little heavy handed. I’m 28F in my last year of medical school. I’ve been a devout Christian since 21 years old. I grew up in a Christian home but didn’t truly know who Christ was until college.
Before medicine, I’ve always dreamt of becoming a mother. I’ve worked in childcare for the majority of my life before I began med school.
I’ve never dated nor have been romantically involved with someone. Not by my own volition. Just never had anyone interested in me growing up. So I am a bit of a late bloomer. In my mid 20s, I’ve tried putting myself out there but nothing has been working out. I feel like I’ve been treated like a place holder for many men. Never the one solely picked. I keep hearing comments from Christian men who state “Oh you’re so nice but I’m not looking for something serious” or “You’re still a virgin? There must be something wrong with you.”
I’ve tried all that I can; online dating, speed dating events, group outings or local events. I’ve even had my parents play matchmaker at some point😅. I just feel invisible despite how much I greet people or try to connect with others. I am also a black woman with darker skin and so I understand I may not be everyone’s cup of tea.
I’ve prayed to God so much about this. But I feel He’s so silent on this matter.
I recently met a person online whom I like very much. However, I don’t think he feels the same way about me. He’s really great at talking but his actions do not match his words. We’ve been talking for about 5 months now and he hasn’t formerly asked me out, or asked when he can visit me. He lives about 3 hours from me and I’ve suggested many options like meeting at a halfway point, or virtual dates. But he beats around push about it. I’ve even suggested driving to him. He rarely calls and gets back to my texts hours or days later. And I call, he doesn’t pick up most of the time. I feel like I’m just a placeholder for him despite him sharing that he wants to have a life with me, get married, buy a house, have children etc. As well as addressing me as “babe” or “honey” but never stating what I am to him or asking me to be his girlfriend. Recently, I’ve been diagnosed with uterine issues and I am distraught.
At this point, I’m feeling burnt out by men and this whole process of dating. I see all my peers around me getting engaged, married, having their babies, etc. They make it seem so easy.
At this point, I just want to be content with myself and the Lord. But I don’t know how to let go of this desire of companionship. I’ve been alone for a majority of my life and just want to embrace it.
I just need to get this off my chest and no other sub felt appropriate to do so other than this one. I apologize if none of what I write makes sense, I guess I just wanted a place to vent. I hate being in medical school. I hate feeling like I’m always behind, always playing catch-up, never feeling good enough. The imposter syndrome is extremely loud. I’m so far away from my family and friends. I’ve yet to make any friends here and I am an M3. I do not feel supported by my medical school at all despite numerous attempts in reaching out. Medical school just takes takes takes, rarely seeing the fruits of your labor. Have to delay my step exams until next year despite trying so hard feels like a big slap to my face. I’ve always struggled heavily academically, even as a child where learning is a very slow process for me.
I never thought I could even pursue something like this. I am a first gen college grad, from a poor background and so I was never really encouraged to pursue a career like this. I wanted to go into illustration and create children’s books and animations. But more than any career, I wanted to become mother and settle down. Motherhood has always been a calling in my life and it only grows stronger as I get older. I’m also a non trad and so I came into medical at a later age.
But an advisor at my college saw something in me that I’ve yet to see. She encouraged me to pursue medicine because she believed in me.
Don’t get me wrong, I love science, especially anatomy and physiology as much as I love art. I came into medicine wanting to go into Peds. I love children and I love babies. Having my first exposure to pediatrics during my 3rd year rotation….I feel miserable. This is it not how imagined my experience would go.
I feel like I’ve wasted so much time, effort and money pursuing something so out of my academic limits. I’m so tired of always being at the bottom of my class despite pushing hard. I’m so frustrated that egg freezing now has to come into the conversation because of potential concerns regarding geriatric pregnancy and delayed family planning, I’m so frustrated that I see my non med friends enjoying life, traveling, getting married, settling down, buying houses, cars etc. where I still feel stuck at square one, single and alone. I hate the fact I’m back on antidepressants and cry myself almost every night wishing I can rewind time.
I wish I worked in a nursery as a NICU nurse because my gap year job really told me that that’s where I truly wanted to be.
I hate this so much and wish I took the time to truly see what I wanted out of life.
Hi ladies,
I could really use some advice🥲. I’m 28 (F) and in my third year of medical school at a U.S. MD. I was recently ghosted by someone I truly thought might be the one. I’ve never dated before him, and I met him through online dating, which I started back in my first year. He was the first person I felt a real connection with, so the ghosting really shook me.
I’ve decided to step back from dating for now because it put me in a bad mental space and just focus on school. Maybe I’ll try again in residency, but I’ll be in my early 30s by then. I’m also a woman of faith, and sometimes it feels like that makes dating even harder.
Before med school, I always dreamed of being a wife and mother to a large family. Now I’m scared that with my demanding career, dating will only get more difficult, and that many men won’t want someone with my schedule.
I guess I’m just wondering if there’s still hope that I’ll meet someone who’s truly meant for me and if any of you have gone through something similar, how did you navigate it?
Thank you 😣🙏🏿✨!
Hello everyone,
I’m not even sure what I’m asking for at this point. I just know I’m struggling, and this community has always felt like a place where I can be honest. My spirit feels so low lately. I’ve been trying so hard to stay positive and trust God’s plan for my life, but right now I feel overwhelmed, unsure, and scared.
I’m a 28F in medical school, about to start my third year. Academically, my path has never been easy. I’ve struggled since childhood, and medical school has been no exception. I constantly feel behind. I haven’t been able to make close friends here, and living far from my family has made the loneliness even heavier. Most days, I end up eating lunch alone in my car because I don’t have anyone to sit with.
I also had to delay my board exam due to low practice scores, while most of my classmates have already taken and passed theirs. It made me feel incredibly inadequate, and I was told that this delay might affect my chances of matching into the specialty I hoped for or even matching back home.
On top of all of that, I met someone four months ago through a dating app (something I had sworn off). I genuinely thought he might be the person I’d spend my life with. Instead, I was love‑bombed and then ghosted two weeks ago. The hardest part is that I still miss him. I’ve always dreamed of becoming a wife and mother, even more than becoming a doctor, and he seemed to want the same things. I prayed so much about him, asking God if he was the right person. I’ve never dated before, and I truly thought this was finally my moment.
I’ve navigated so much of life on my own. I’m grateful for my family, but it hit me recently that without them, I would have no one. It’s painful watching others build community, relationships, confidence, and strong applications for their dream specialties while I feel stuck in place despite trying so hard to make these a reality for myself as well. I know comparison isn’t helpful, but right now, I’m struggling with liking who I am.
Hi everyone,
Would love some prayers for healing if that’s okay? A man I met a couple of months ago has officially ghosted me. I really thought my prayer was being answered when I met him. I really, really liked him but as time went on, I could tell his interest in me was dwindling. Less calls, less texts. Despite his reassurance in that he saw a future with me and couldn’t wait to meet me.
I miss him a lot. But I understand why things went the way they did. I prayed so much for discernment about this situation as I’ve never dated before. And God finally answered. Though I’m still heart broken about the matter and really thought we could make things work. This was my closest thing to a relationship even though he never officially asked me out. I don’t know what to make of this other than I’m feeling really down and a bit heartbroken.