u/taftiendsbullydrama

I feel bad for asking, and I want to preface this by saying I’m genuinely asking I’m not trying to make fun of anyone. If anything, I’m a little concerned for the kids. But what’s up with the way they talk? Are they doing it on purpose? I feel like Jill and that man she’s married to (I don’t know his name.) They sound off to me too, but not nearly as severe as their children.

I’m venting here so this might be harsh but for context, everyone on this HOA is old as hell, and sometimes I genuinely feel like they’re trying to relive their high school days by making everyone who lives here miserable. Like my title says I feel like I’m in some sort of retirement home ran by dictators. They are so rude, nobody ever smiles, nobody says hi back, and the whole vibe just feels weirdly hostile. I honestly can’t tell if this is normal HOA behavior because I’ve never lived somewhere like this before.

The reason I even bought here was because I thought having an HOA would make life easier. At my old apartment complex, I dealt with really extreme issues from upstairs neighbors heavy substance use, partying, intense stomping at all hours of the day, just constant chaos. Property management did nothing. So after that, having a little structure honestly sounded nice. But this building has been so high control, it’s too much.

My fridge died a couple weeks ago and we had to wait until yesterday to get it replaced. The interaction took MAYBE 10 minutes. The delivery guys came, took the old fridge, brought the new one in, and left. I literally let the building know they were coming ahead of time. They told me which garage to use, I followed instructions, used the padded elevator, and stayed with the vendors the entire time.

The next day, I get these wildly dramatic emails from the HOA/building management talking about how “concerned” and “disappointed” they are because I didn’t have the vendors sign in. Apparently this was a “security breach.”
A security breach? Be fucking serious. I wasn’t letting random strangers roam the building. I was with them the entire time while they replaced a refrigerator in my unit. It took TEN MINUTES. And this is what kills me about HOA living. If I supposedly “own” my home, why does it feel like I’m having to ask permission to breathe.

My neighbor said he literally got fined because his 12 year old kid yelled “woohoo!” too loudly at a sports game and Karen who sits on the HOA heard it from the hallway and had a fit about it. They also tried to give me grief because my four year old niece spent the night, saying they need to be “aware” of anyone staying more than three hours. Im sorry, but if my preschool aged family member sleeping over is a threat to the building, maybe we’ve lost the plot. I am just so over it.

Also, I forgot to initially put this in, but I don’t drive. I don’t live in a city where you need a car. My partner does drive, and I have my own private parking spot. They threatened to have his car towed because we didn’t check in and have it registered. Obviously if someone was using my spot without permission, that would be another story, but my partner who they’ve seen 1 million times and they know has my consent to park in the spot. Give me a break.

Edit 1: just wanna add when I was younger I rented through a private Landlord and was a building with an HOA and they didn’t act like this.. it was super chill.