u/the-orchid-thief

Looking for a printer rec for standard / basic black and white copies. Rather use a local shop than staples or FedEx. Thanks!

Hey I was grabbing some ice cream yesterday (around 5pm) and noticed a security guard - standing near the nail salon but I think was technically in front of the unmarked store front. Literally two doors down from screen door. He was wearing a tshirt that said SECURITY. Anyone know what that’s about? Seemed random … especially on a Friday afternoon.

Solid rec for a good dry cleaner to wash/clean special (expensive) clothing items?

I’ve had the urge last 3-5 years to write my own music — if not, just for the pure joy of it.

I am a retired ballerina, so I love all classical works but pretty much listen to all genres. Music is so much part of who I am (although I never learned to play an instrument or read music).

I also am a pretty avid writer, specially with poetry. Won some small competitions, but again write for the pure joy of it.

Does anyone have any advice on how to tackle song writing? Specifically how to translate your poems into a song? So many times I’ll listen to musician interviews and they’ll be like “I’ll hear the song- the guitars and drums… and then I’ll kinda play around with lyrics.”

But my brain doesn’t work that way, I guess I work with words first?… but yea, any suggestions? Writing songs for dummies question lol

Hey those who want to continue the Black Parade celebrations / emo night, there’s a spot that can accommodate LGBTQI+ friendly and has free karaoke every night.

Whose down? Lmk if you wanna come thru so I can give the venue a heads up.

My bf (29 M) and I (34 F) have been together for a little over 2 years.

We met at work, and our relationship has had its ups and downs. Most of our arguments are while on alcohol/drugs, in addition to him always being very possessively paranoid whenever we would go out. I would keep my cool, up to a point. Whenever I did defend myself verbally and physically that’s when disaster hit. So I started to take a different route when fights would occur, and either sit in silence or not engage with him when he’d spiral out.

The last year or so, we both took drastic steps (IMO) to cut back on our toxic lifestyle- and I’ve seen and felt the improvement on both ends… for the most part. I completely did a 180 and changed careers and surrounded myself with different friends that drink and party less, but he still has the same job in the hospitality industry so it’s harder to pull back from drinking and activities.

Anyways, last night we got into an argument that he claims I started or was over nothing? We had met up for some food/drinks, which he came immediately after working out at the gym. Fast forward a few hours later and the plan was to go out again to a different spot but I asked if he wanted to go home shower/freshen up to be more comfy. This made him spiral into asking “if he smelt” which he didn’t. I had a few drinks at this point tho so I must’ve repeatedly asked him if he wanted to go home and shower before we headed to our next destination. He lost it.

We got into a huge fight. A lot of things were said to me, but I’ll get to the main points, which is the reason I’m coming to this thread for advice:
He mostly accused me of starting our bickering for no reason tonight, that this argument was my fault, and then he went into the most hurtful comment someone’s ever told me (paraphrasing to the best of my ability);

“You’ve been with so many men… you’re so damaged… and I have to deal with the damage of your past… you’ve got serious issues.”

We weren’t even talking about any of this. He just said this out of nowhere. I was crushed… he broke my heart right then and there. I expressed how hurtful this was and how could he tell me this - visibly crying and shaking. He just sat on my bed zoned out and idk if the weight of his words hit him or he really didn’t give a shit. After some time, he eventually pulled me into a hug and said “I’m sorry I love you” a few times because I was just crying.

Sure, I have had a life before him- some trauma that he does and doesn’t know about. I’ve been to therapy during our relationship. But he too has a lot of familial trauma that he’s been open about with me - this past Father’s Day he cried for about an hour in my living room and didn’t want to engage with me. He does not want to go to therapy.

The point is, he and I have had some hard and dark shit happen to us in our past. And for him to throw that in my face, and claim my trauma equates me to being damaged goods beyond repair, essentially no man wants to deal with, was disgusting.

This morning I texted “I need some space for a bit,” to which he replied “ok I’m going to block you have a good day”

I just can’t make sense of his behavior. I can’t make sense if he really is empathetic and sorry for what he said. Or he just used words to shut me up because I was weeping so hard, he just pitied me with consolation until I stopped. I don’t know if he actually meant what he said. I don’t know what’s real. If a man thinks a woman is damaged, will he always see her that way?

Idk. The world is fucked up.

My bf (29 M) and I (34 F) have been together for a little over 2 years.

We met at work, and our relationship has had its ups and downs. Most of our arguments are while on alcohol/drugs, in addition to him always being very possessively paranoid whenever we would go out. I would keep my cool, up to a point. Whenever I did defend myself verbally and physically that’s when disaster hit. So I started to take a different route when fights would occur, and either sit in silence or not engage with him when he’d spiral out.

The last year or so, we both took drastic steps (IMO) to cut back on our toxic lifestyle- and I’ve seen and felt the improvement on both ends… for the most part. I completely did a 180 and changed careers and surrounded myself with different friends that drink and party less, but he still has the same job in the hospitality industry so it’s harder to pull back from drinking and activities.

Anyways, last night we got into an argument that he claims I started or was over nothing? We had met up for some food/drinks, which he came immediately after working out at the gym. Fast forward a few hours later and the plan was to go out again to a different spot but I asked if he wanted to go home shower/freshen up to be more comfy. This made him spiral into asking “if he smelt” which he didn’t. I had a few drinks at this point tho so I must’ve repeatedly asked him if he wanted to go home and shower before we headed to our next destination. He lost it.

We got into a huge fight. A lot of things were said to me, but I’ll get to the main points, which is the reason I’m coming to this thread for advice:
He mostly accused me of starting our bickering for no reason tonight, that this argument was my fault, and then he went into the most hurtful comment someone’s ever told me (paraphrasing to the best of my ability);

“You’ve been with so many men… you’re so damaged… and I have to deal with the damage of your past… you’ve got serious issues.”

We weren’t even talking about any of this. He just said this out of nowhere. I was crushed… he broke my heart right then and there. I expressed how hurtful this was and how could he tell me this - visibly crying and shaking. He just sat on my bed zoned out and idk if the weight of his words hit him or he really didn’t give a shit. After some time, he eventually pulled me into a hug and said “I’m sorry I love you” a few times because I was just crying.

Sure, I have had a life before him- some trauma that he does and doesn’t know about. I’ve been to therapy during our relationship. But he too has a lot of familial trauma that he’s been open about with me - this past Father’s Day he cried for about an hour in my living room and didn’t want to engage with me. He does not want to go to therapy.

The point is, he and I have had some hard and dark shit happen to us in our past. And for him to throw that in my face, and claim my trauma equates me to being damaged goods beyond repair, essentially no man wants to deal with, was disgusting.

This morning I texted “I need some space for a bit,” to which he replied “ok I’m going to block you have a good day”

I just can’t make sense of his behavior. I can’t make sense if he really is empathetic and sorry for what he said. Or he just used words to shut me up because I was weeping so hard, he just pitied me with consolation until I stopped. I don’t know if he actually meant what he said. I don’t know what’s real. If a man thinks a woman is damaged, will he always see her that way?

Idk. The world is fucked up.

I moved from Brooklyn to Sunnyside 🌞 really enjoying it so far! I am a big foodie and would love any and all must try’s in the neighborhood. Also any awesome Pilates studios as well? Thanks!