u/waterfall203

I have moments where I feel so loved and then many more moments where I feel like I am in the pit of loneliness and that I don’t deserve friendships or community. I know these thoughts are condemning and not from God and I am requesting prayer for peace and calmness from these thoughts. I want to have close friendships with people. I don’t want to keep being in my despair. I want to live in God’s love and have a good community of people who understand me and can help me to understand God better.

I posted a week ago about how God transformed my mind and heart on abortion. I now cannot see the pro choice side clearly anymore. It was like I heard Him speaking directly to my heart and soul about how we should protect the vulnerable and how thinking otherwise is not appropriate.

I am posting again because I need Christian advice on what to do moving forward. I would like to better understand how I can grow and stand up for my views. I want to lovingly show others why thinking otherwise is wrong but without judgment. Does anyone have any biblical ideas or advice for me?

In addition, I had some Christian friends cut me out of their life unless I changed my view on abortion. It seemed a bit restrictive at first, but I am wondering if I should reach back out to them now that I had this experience and felt God calling me to understand why it was wrong what I have been thinking. It has been a month and I don’t know whether they will be upset or confused or whether they will rejoice and be happy I have prayed about it and God has spoken to me.

I guess ultimately I would like to know how to grow moving forward and where I can search for answers in the Bible and where to start reading. I am beyond grateful.

Original post:

I don’t know who else needs to hear this, but I am so grateful that I waited on God. After a long talk with a woman from my church, I heard God speak to my heart and my mind and my soul and knew this was the right choice. I felt Him speak to me and tell me how each child he formed is made in His beautiful image and how we need to protect the vulnerable. I can’t believe I am typing this out.

I have lost Christian friendships because of my stubbornness in wanting to follow “my body, my choice”. I can now say that God spoke and cut through to my innermost being and has opened my eyes to why that is wrong and why I should wait on Him and His perfect timing as well as His word. He has a perfect plan for each one of us. I am so grateful for God’s patience with me and that He transformed me. If He can transform the stubbornness in me, there’s nothing impossible through His power.

When I say that I heard God speak to my heart, I mean that I literally felt like He was there with me and this woman I was talking to. I felt this love exuding from me and had this image of a child on an ultrasound in my mind. I put myself in the shoes of a new mother who was conflicted on whether or not she should keep her child and then I saw the ultrasound and thought to myself, “I could never do anything to this child because they are precious and wonderfully made”. And then I felt God telling me “that’s your answer”. And I know in my heart that it’s right because God wants us to protect the vulnerable.

Thank you for listening to my story. I know God will continue to guide me.

I don’t know who else needs to hear this, but I am so grateful that I waited on God. After a long talk with a woman from my church, I heard God speak to my heart and my mind and my soul and knew this was the right choice. I felt Him speak to me and tell me how each child he formed is made in His beautiful image and how we need to protect the vulnerable. I can’t believe I am typing this out.

I have lost Christian friendships because of my stubbornness in wanting to follow “my body, my choice”. I can now say that God spoke and cut through to my innermost being and has opened my eyes to why that is wrong and why I should wait on Him and His perfect timing as well as His word. He has a perfect plan for each one of us. I am so grateful for God’s patience with me and that He transformed me. If He can transform the stubbornness in me, there’s nothing impossible through His power.

When I say that I heard God speak to my heart, I mean that I literally felt like He was there with me and this woman I was talking to. I felt this love exuding from me and had this image of a child on an ultrasound in my mind. I put myself in the shoes of a new mother who was conflicted on whether or not she should keep her child and then I saw the ultrasound and thought to myself, “I could never do anything to this child because they are precious and wonderfully made”. And then I felt God telling me “that’s your answer”. And I know in my heart that it’s right because God wants us to protect the vulnerable.

Thank you for listening to my story. I know God will continue to guide me.

I had a breakup with friends over political and personal beliefs and now I hear God calling me back to Him and to transform my beliefs. I want to have a renewed mind and spirit. I want to have friends again that I can talk with and grow with spiritually. I am asking for prayers that God would show me His love and create in me a renewed spirit because I feel I have fallen too far away. I can’t stop crying when I think of all the ways I have grown apart and all I want is peace and clarity.

I want to preface this by saying that it appears that no matter how hard I try to manage what I am going through, it always comes back.

When I experienced an NDE, it was filled with love and peace. I saw a figure who I immediately recognized as knowing since before I was born, like a pre birth memory. That’s beside the point though, as I’d like to better understand primarily the feelings and geometric shapes I have been seeing.

Bear with me here because I can’t understand this part or put it into words properly but I will try my best. Before my NDE, since I was a young child around the age of three, I would see beautiful geometric shapes like graphs in my mind that were increasing. There were shapes inside shapes and mostly like a white blue color. While they morphed sometimes, they would alway be increasing like a crescendo in music. I heard something telling me, something will happen at the end of this crescendo/geometric shape. And then that’s when my NDE happened and where things got even more bizarre.

Following my NDE, the crescendos and geometric shapes have taken on different forms. Now they seem to be this blend of decrescendos and somedays, I can “see” in my mind’s eye them descending into pitch black like I was in the middle of the universe and then other days they end with the figure I saw during my NDE. Nothing has taken away this. I also experience many feeling of love and peace coming back whenever I think about the moment and feel as though I can connect with the figure on a deep personal level.

Does anyone have any thoughts or resources I can read and research to better understand this? Somedays, I feel as though I can control it and other days, it feels near impossible.

Anyone else who had an NDE meditate on their experience and what wisdom they gained from it? Or just sit in the peace and love they felt during their NDE and reflect on it?

I’ve found these to be particularly helpful in integrating what I experienced during my NDE. I have thought about who I saw as well as the whole emotions and feelings I experienced. I have also been able to bring back vivid memories of the time to better understand it as well as feel immense love and peace in times of trouble.

I can understand if an NDE was traumatic, this could potentially not be the case.

Mine was filled with love and peace and meditating on it comes naturally like a pull and someone calling out to me.

If you decide to compartmentalize every aspect of your life as you deal with your mental health symptoms, you are still going to have to deal with them later on down the road. It’s healthier than masking symptoms because for masking, you are essentially still feeling the symptoms but putting on a smiling face for everyone to see. Perhaps masking is a form of compartmentalizing but it really is up to each person for what works for their lifestyle.